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Anyone Elses DH nervous?

crystalknppcrystalknpp member
in Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss
So the Ob-gyn said we were ok to have sex again about 3 weeks after my surgery but DH was so nervous about hurting me he said lets just wait til your post op check up and for first AF. Well the check up went fine and AF has come and gone. The Dr. said we can't TTC again until January to make sure I'm healed enough from the surgery I had. Well DH told me last night that he's nervous to have sex now because he's scared of getting me pregnant again before January when its 100% safe for me to be pregnant. We've always used condoms and I have never gotten pregnant before we were ready to start TTC but for some reason he's now petrified that they wont be enough and I will get pregnant. I know he is just nervous and me needing major surgery and loosing the baby all at the same time was probably just alot for him to deal with. I just don't know how to reassure him that I'm going to be fine!!

"Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart"

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Re: Anyone Elses DH nervous?

  • Temp950106187509203Temp950106187509203 member
    I think this is a pretty normal reaction.  There's such a feeling of powerlessness that so many partners have, because there's nothing he can do to "fix" things for you.  Like you said, he's just nervous and doesn't really know how to act with this situation.  I would try to sit down with him and have a little heart-to-heart.  Tell him that you need the emotional connection with him that sex brings, and gently remind him that condoms have always worked for you in the past.  Your doctor knows the failure rates for condoms, and if the Dr. didn't tell you to get on multiple forms of bc and has given you the go-ahead for sex, that must mean that the Dr. is willing, from a medical standpoint, for you to take that risk.
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  • lindsay.loulindsay.lou member
    My dh is very nervous as well. I think just watching me go through such a painful physical trauma freaked him out. He just wants to do everything *right* so he's nervous.
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  • jesseandbrijesseandbri
    I am the nervous one in our home.  DH is ready to have sex again full steam ahead but I am scared out of my mind!  I got PG before getting AF between my two and I don't want to do that again.
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