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Worried about missing out while at work...

garrayagarraya
in Working Moms
I havent actually had my baby yet but its getting closer.. I work 45-50hrs a week and I'm so afraid already of what I'll be missing after I return from maternity leave. I plan on breast feeding and taking care of MY baby. Which is another concern because I know how hard it can be to work and breast feed at the same time.. pumping doesnt have the same effect and from what I understand, your milk is more likely to dry up faster :(  It kills me to think that I'm going to have to leave her with my mother in law instead of being there myself to take care of my baby( No offense to Grandma!) Does anyone else know what I'm talking about or have advice?
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Re: Worried about missing out while at work...

  • SoldiersGreenBeanSoldiersGreenBean

    Yes, pumping isn't as effective as a baby.  However, that doesn't necessarily mean that your milk will dry up.  Check out kellymom.com for great breastfeeing info.  There are things you can do to help up your supply, too, so try not to worry that it will automatically happen.  We made it 6 months, but I have more than one girlfriend who has made it past a year.

    I've have very few bad days, as I think that feeling guilty takes up too much time and energy.  It's wonderful that she's with her Grandma (I hope it works ok for you guys!).  Also try to remember that it takes a village to raise a child.

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  • AlisaSAlisaS member
    You are going to have to get over the "MY baby" thing real quick.....
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  • luciagdelopezluciagdelopez member

    It takes a village to raise a child. 

    Be glad you have your MIL to help in watching your baby vs no family around.  I love my nanny but at the end of the day she is not grandma.  However, my DD has become so independent and confident in herself by being around other kids and is not super clingy with me.  She knows that I can leave and will always come back. 

    Take things one step at a time and I am sure everything will work out.

    AND, there are tons of women that have pumped and worked up until the baby is 18 months so it is doable.

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  • 14years14years

    I returned to work when DS was 3 months old and pumped until he was 1 year.  He's 16 months old now, and we are still BFing nights, mornings and weekends.  It CAN be done!  A lot of us here have successfully pumped and worked, so as you get into it, you can always get a lot of great tips and support here.

    I have never focused on what I am missing with DS -- he really enjoys daycare and has a lot of fun, and we spend a lot of quality time together.  So, I focus on what we do have together. He is very well-adjusted and happy and, while he loves DH and me best, he trusts other people and is very out going.  Good luck!

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  • anglynn1124anglynn1124

    Dont beat yourself up about being a working mom...that IS taking care of your baby too !    babies arent cheap, they need things which cost money, how are we supposed to get them those things ?  by working !   sometimes, it takes 2 parents to do that and give your child the best life possible, there is nothing wrong with that !

    as for pumping, i formula feed, so I cant help you too much there but lots of working moms pump successfully , so there is no reason to assume it wont work for you..it might be challenging, but if it's really want you want to do, you can make it happen !

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  • qw23fv09ij87tf23qw23fv09ij87tf23
    It is great that you can leave your child with a family member instead of a stranger. I would not be so hard on yourself. I woudl be lying if I said that you would not be missing out on some things. I missed one of our daughters' first steps. At first I was sad but I did not beat myself up over it. They know that you are mommy and no one else can replace that.
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  • carrie4gcarrie4g

    You have to stop yourself from overthinking it. Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy and all the time you get with your LO during your maternity leave .Returning back to work can be difficult at first but a lot of moms on this site have been back for awhile and I'm sure a majority of them would agree with me when I say that I feel a wonderful sense of balance and really truly enjoy my life and feel that this is the best for my family.  The world doesn't revolve around allowing you freedom to take care of your baby 24/7. that just isn't life and you'd be miserable if that's all you did. Part of life is learning to put your emotions aside and do what is best for your family as a whole. So don't overthink it and enjoy your last few weeks of eating whatever you want guilt free.... ! Smile

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  • weddedwifeweddedwife member

    I'm not going to lie, working FT is hard. I hate thinking about what I'm missing. I too leave DD w/ grandmas during the week, and trust me, the peace of mind I have from that versus leaving her w/ strangers is priceless.

    You can successfully nurse and work. Check out the book "Nursing Mother, Working Mother". I found it extremely helpful and encouraging.

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  • garrayagarraya

    Thankss ladies... your advice helps :) I think I like this discussion board thing.. I'm new and its pretty comforting

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