Attachment Parenting

why is the stroller so important???

Nearly every time I talk to my mom she comments on how we "need to get Em used to that stroller!". I'm not against the stroller, by any means... but she is too small to do anything but lay flat in the stroller (which she hates, and is bad for her reflux) unless she is in the carseat- which she also hates. I don't mind, I have a sling and an ergo.

Last night my mom's reason for getting her used to the stroller was so that I could go on more walks. I said we go on plenty of walks (hello, there is a natural parenting store 6 blocks away!). She said that it was better exercise to push a stroller... uh, opposed to physically carrying her? Really?

It's not like riding in a stroller is some life skill she needs to master. And I have ZERO doubt that eventually she will no longer want to be carried all the time, and then the stroller will be used. 

I'm still trying to figure out why this is such a sticking point for my mom. I think it might be because baby carriers *look* hard, while anybody can push a stroller... so she wants to be able to push Em in a stroller? 

*note- I have nothing against strollers. I have 2, and they will be used someday. I just don't see forcing it

Re: why is the stroller so important???

  • LOL at the stroller as a "life skill"!

    I would guess it's because she wants to be able to push her?  Does she?  Is she interested in wearing her at all?

    When I went down to visit my parents when kiddo was 5 months old, I had them borrow a car seat.  My mom asked me a million times if I wanted the stroller too - and I said no we don't really use one every time.  But then it was pretty funny because everywhere we went, she made sure to point out to people that I always wear kiddo and never use the stroller!  Moms!

    I'd just ask her way she's worried about it.  Maybe let her take kiddo for a walk in the stroller some - it might be that she just wants that experience?

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  • They aren't.  Some people are just obsessed with them.  I don't get it.
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  • I also LOLed at the "life skill" comment.

    I have a stroller that might get used someday...I just really dont like them. I would just tell her you simply dont like them yet either.

     

  • I'd be willing to bet that its because your mom wants to push her in the stroller.  We went to the zoo this summer with my parents and you wouldn't believe how excited my mom was to push the stroller around.  She thinks baby wearing is cool, but she doesn't feel comfortable doing it personally, so pushing the stroller is her way of being involved.

    When DD was an infant my MIL asked me a few times when I was going to stop BFing.  It really pissed me off that she kept asking, until I realized that she was just looking for another way to be involved.  She wanted to "help us" by buying us formula and by being able to give the baby a bottle so I could have a break.  Her intentions were good, but her methods were screwy.  :-)  She also really wanted to buy us baby food, but thankfully backed off when I explained that I was making DD's food.

    Grandparents are funny creatures.  :-P

    Heather Margaret --- Feb '07 and Todd Eldon --- April '09
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  • My parents and ILs LOVE the stroller.  They always want to walk him around.  It's definitely a way for them to be involved.
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  • she probably wants to use the stroller herself.  My mom will wear a baby, but not for a walk. She got us an awesome stroller, I explained that I love it, but it's forward facing and i'm just not into it yet (theyre only 2 mos. old!)  For short trips to the store, I wear one and have one in the carseat facing me, or if DH is with me, we both wear a babe.  I have a snap n go that I use if necessary.  That way, at least they are both facing me.  Dont worry, mom...we'll use the fancy stroller eventually. 
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  • imageIU_baby:
    My parents and ILs LOVE the stroller.  They always want to walk him around.  It's definitely a way for them to be involved.

    Agreed.  My parents think it's cool that I wear DS and definitely see the advantage but whenever they babysit they always make sure I bring the stroller so they can take him for a walk.  Luckily he loves the stroller as well so it's a win-win.  

    Sounds like your mom wants to be more involved and doesn't know how to go about asking without being annoying.  

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  • The stroller is vitally important = it holds all the crap while you are carrying your LO!
  • imageIU_baby:
    My parents and ILs LOVE the stroller.  They always want to walk him around.  It's definitely a way for them to be involved.

    This. 100%.

    DD actually looooves her stroller, so we put her in as soon as she could hold her head up (which opened me up to a completely different sort of "advice"). But I definitely don't think that "mastering" stroller riding was a significant milestone for her or anything. No reason to do it if neither you nor LO are interested. But if you already have the stroller, then you can tell your mom "We prefer to wear her, but you are completely welcome to use the stroller when you take her out."

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  • imageKateB1984:

    My MIL always tells me wearing DS will only last so long because he'll get too big and heavy soon. So I'd better get him used to a stroller before it's 'too late' and he refuses to ride in it.

    I read a fantastic article when DS#1 was born about our stroller addict culture. Because so many times it's easier to wear your child or teach them to walk. My friends are stunned I don't have a double stroller for my kids. Um.... usually I don't even have a single stroller when I'm out because I wear the baby and my 2yo walks everywhere. Don't get me wrong - I'm not anti-strollers at all. I just think they're overused, especially for young babies and kids old enough to walk for long periods of time.

    I agree that it's probably partly that she wants to push him, but I also think it could be part of the cultural 'spoiling' mentality - if you don't get your child in a stroller, sleeping on their own, on a schedule, taking a bottle, etc, etc, later it will be too late.

    I usually just let my MIL (or whoever else) rant and then smile calmly and say, "that's really something I'm not concerned about." I find it easier than trying to uselessly explain my point of view when it falls on deaf ears.

    you know what's funny though? My dad is rather anti-stroller. He isn't pro BWing, he just thinks that once a child can walk, they should walk. He HATES seeing 3, 4, 5 year olds in strollers looking all zoned out. He is a PE teacher :) 

    So, she "needs" to learn to sit in a stroller, but not for too long! lol

    I don't mind if my mom wants to try the stroller. Maybe she will like it. But, I prefer wearing her... 

  • your mom wants to push her in the stroller.  I guarantee you that is it.

    My mom LOVES taking DS for walks.  It's a grandma thing I think.

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