Attachment Parenting

You know what bugs me?

When people leave their baby to cry, and then turn on white noise or put on head phones or get in the shower so they don't have to hear them. If its difficult to listen to, don't you think its difficult to go through? If its unbearable for you, don't you think its unbearable for your kid? It makes me want to start slapping people.

It's one thing if your baby won't.stop.crying. no matter what you do and you feel like you're going to lose it so you put them down and walk away. Its another thing entirely to make the decision that you're not only going to ignore your baby's cries, you're also going to pretend that its not happening.

Lilypie First Birthday tickers Lilypie Third Birthday tickers Keshias Birthday 2012 046edit

Re: You know what bugs me?

  • The headphones I don't get... but I have (and will again) gotten in the shower when Em is really upset and freaking out. The noise of the shower makes her calm down 90% of the time, and the shower calms me down. So it's not to ignore her, it's because that's something that works. Same with the white noise- it's like an off switch. I've put her in her bouncer before and then gotten out the vacuum. It might look like I'm ignoring her.. but really it is soothing to her.
  • Loading the player...
  • imagecindy453:
    The headphones I don't get... but I have (and will again) gotten in the shower when Em is really upset and freaking out. The noise of the shower makes her calm down 90% of the time, and the shower calms me down.

    We had to do this with ds.  We would take 30 minute shifts.  When it wasn't my shift I would go out on the balcony and cover my ears or go into the bath and run the water so I couldn't hear.  But he had horrible colic.  Horrible, horrible colic.  And he was never alone...dh was with him when I was hiding and vice versa.

    image
  • I don't understand it either. It breaks my heart when I'm alone with DD, sick hungry and fixing myself food, and she's in the same room with me crying her head off. I'm speaking to her, going over and offering her comfort, then going back to the stove... but still, I'm usually almost in tears by the time I'm done cooking... then my food gets cold because I'm too busy comforting her. I can't imagine going into another room and letting her CIO!

     

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • I really don't get it either. I could never ignore my child's cry, I can barely walk away for a second when we both need a time out to calm down.
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickersLilypie Third Birthday tickers
                                ~Missed MC at 8 weeks. D&C at 12 weeks on 4/17/13~ 
                               image                     
       Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • imageHippinski:

    imagecindy453:
    The headphones I don't get... but I have (and will again) gotten in the shower when Em is really upset and freaking out. The noise of the shower makes her calm down 90% of the time, and the shower calms me down.

    We had to do this with ds.  We would take 30 minute shifts.  When it wasn't my shift I would go out on the balcony and cover my ears or go into the bath and run the water so I couldn't hear.  But he had horrible colic.  Horrible, horrible colic.  And he was never alone...dh was with him when I was hiding and vice versa.

    This pretty much sums up months 2-4 of DD's life.

    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickersLilypie Kids Birthday tickers
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • It makes me sad.  I know a woman who decided to Ferber (after BFing and nursing on demand for the first 7 months) and she and her husband would go downstairs and watch TV while LO cried.  The idea of that absolutely broke my heart.  I also hate hearing CIO advice given to newer CIO parents.  "My LO only CedIO it out for a week, so keep at it!" "whenever we go on vacation or have a schedule change we have to re-Ferber," ack I could go on.  I do not even open CIO posts anymore and keep quiet when it's discussed in front of me.  Course, at this point everyone I know knows how I feel about CIO and also knows that we made it to a STTN toddler w/o CingIO once...so it's just kind of out there.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imageDobie_Mama:
    imageHippinski:

    imagecindy453:
    The headphones I don't get... but I have (and will again) gotten in the shower when Em is really upset and freaking out. The noise of the shower makes her calm down 90% of the time, and the shower calms me down.

    We had to do this with ds.  We would take 30 minute shifts.  When it wasn't my shift I would go out on the balcony and cover my ears or go into the bath and run the water so I couldn't hear.  But he had horrible colic.  Horrible, horrible colic.  And he was never alone...dh was with him when I was hiding and vice versa.

    This pretty much sums up months 2-4 of DD's life.

    That's totally different from turning on white noise JUST BECAUSE you don't want to hear the baby. If its going to help them, fine. If its only going to help you, not fine. Sometimes I'll go in the shower so I don't have to hear DS cry, but his dad is with him. . .he's not alone.

    Lilypie First Birthday tickers Lilypie Third Birthday tickers Keshias Birthday 2012 046edit
  • One of the "you just have to let them CIO" rants I got subjected to when DS was first born was from my hair stylist. She told me that when all 3 of her kids turned 6 weeks old, she turned on the white noise in her room, shut off the baby monitors, & just left them in their cribs for 11 hours. It was so hard, she said, but I just had to do it.

    I actually told her that was a horrible thing to do to a newborn & that I had no intention of taking her advice. She shut up after that.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Ugh, so heartbreaking.  Or when the mom checks into a hotel for the night while the dad lets the baby CIO.  I just don't get it :(
  • imagewebMistress0609:

    One of the "you just have to let them CIO" rants I got subjected to when DS was first born was from my hair stylist. She told me that when all 3 of her kids turned 6 weeks old, she turned on the white noise in her room, shut off the baby monitors, & just left them in their cribs for 11 hours. It was so hard, she said, but I just had to do it.

    I actually told her that was a horrible thing to do to a newborn & that I had no intention of taking her advice. She shut up after that.

     That's horrible.  Good for you for speaking up.

This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"