TTC After a Loss

s/o Did you foresee your m/c (clicky)

Heather's "let's play a game" post below made me realize that a lot of us here "knew" something was wrong before we learned we were miscarrying.  So, did something in your heart tell you the pg wasn't viable before you actually m/c'd or learned of the missed-m/c?[Poll]

Re: s/o Did you foresee your m/c (clicky)

  • I knew immediately when I got the BFP. something in my gut told me something wasn't right.
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  • I wouldn't say I knew something was wrong or I was going to m/c but I did feel like something was not quite right. It was so long since I had DD that I didn't know if how I was feeling was normal or not.
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  • I voted Other- I was so far along I absolutely did not expect anything to happen at that point, but I used to have dreams all the time about the baby coming 2 months early and not being ready for her. It was right at 2 months early that she died. Weird huh.
    BFP #1- 1/16/09- Baby Ava stillborn at 32 weeks, possible cord accident, 7/30/09
    BFP #2- 1/5/10- Baby Jack born at 37w2d, 6lbs 13 oz, 8/24/10
    BFP #3- 7/30/11- Baby Boy Due April 3, 2012
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  • One of my best friends was due exactly 3 weeks before me so we were sharing everyting about TTC, testing, etc.  She started telling people she was pregnant at around 10 weeks after her u/s.  I went for my u/s a few weeks later and left her a message that everything was great, saw hb.  Turns out she was in the OB's office at the same time b/c she was m/c.  After that, I just had a weird feeling and I wasn't surprised at all when I started spotting.  I ended up having my m/c exactly 3 weeks after hers. 

     

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  • With my first loss I knew right away.

    With Zoe I knew that I stopped feeling her, but I kept telling myself I was just missing the movement. When they told me heart stopped, I was screaming I knew it, I knew she was gone.

    With my twins, I thought it was too good to be true....it was.  I didn't know though.

    DD(9)DD(5.5)DS(3)DS(born 2/1/11) July 2006, lost a baby at 8 weeks, natural miscarriage , May 2009 lost Zoe Eliana at 17 weeks no reason known, possible under developed organs. Lost two more babies in September 2009 at 7 wks 4 days. Had myomectomy surgery to remove a large fibroid in November 2009.
  • I didnt know anything was wrong at the time, but now looking back when my symptoms went away at 9 wks, I should have known something was wrong. I'd never that lucky to have no symptoms!
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  • Yes and no.... Haliegh wasn't affected by ABS until she was about 9-10weeks... (while we were on our honeymoon.... I hate Kauai now!!!) Up until week 12- I really tried not to get attached.... then, I was full steam ahead.
  • I had no idea with my first. I felt like such a fool for not knowing for so long, even though there's really no way I could have known. For the second I was on tenterhooks so I expected it every time. I still struggle to have faith in this one.
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  • It was expected...I dont think my body was nurished enough to have a baby just yet. Mind you, we got pregnant after coming back from the honeymoon. As I prepared for the wedding, I was on a very strict diet and there were times when I wasn't eating at all. It couldve been the lack of nutritions. To top it all off, while pregnant I got the flu and took lots of medications for it. So I dont know if that had something to do with it. Oh yea, I got laid off work THREE DAYS before my wedding; all the stress couldve been the cause of it too....who knows; maybe 2010 will be a good year for all of us....good luck to all who are TTC!!! (((hugs))
    Married April 24th, 2009 BFP May 13, 2009 Blighted Ovum-6/18/2009 8wks M/C 7/1/2009-lasted 2 and half weeks 1st round of Provera 10/1/2009-10/10/2009 =still waiting!?!?! FIRST AF showed up: 10/25/2009-10/30/2009 SECOND AF 12/2/2009-12/6/2009 THIRD AND FINAL AF BEFORE TTC: 01/12/2010-12/18/2010 2nd round on Provera: 3/3/2010-3/12/2010 AF- 3/17/2010-3/23/2010 1ST ROUND CLOMID CD5-9: 3/21/2010-3/25/2010 BFP-April 25th, 2010 M/C-May 15th 2010 (NO HEARTBEAT @ 8.5wks) AF #1 since mc on July 15th, 2010 (TTC since this date) AF #2 since mc on Sept 27th, 2010 (TTC) Oct. 2010-decided to go see an RE Dec. 2010 Diagnosed with PCOS Dec. 11th 2010 AF #3 since mc AF #3 since mc-Dec 11th, 2010 Jan 25th, 2011- 1st IUI w/ ovidrel Feb 7th 2011- TOTAL BUST~~BFN AF showed her face Feb. 10th 2011 Feb.25th 2011-IUI #2 w/ Clomid and ovidrel shot-??? Pregnancy Test on March 11th-BFP Daisypath Anniversary tickers image
  • OTHER:

    For several weeks the dr. thought they were conjoined twins and I was sure I would m/c.

    The week before my m/c we FINALLY got the all clear from the doctors. The ONE week I felt confident in my healthy preg I go and m/c.

  • With my 1st m/c, I was blind sided. The second, I knew...
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  • Not at first.  My first appt was at 8 weeks.  Starting at around 7 weeks I felt sure that I was going to lose the baby.  No spotting or loss of symptoms, just a feeling.  Sometimes it's not fun being right.  Although on the plus side, ever since I found out I was going to lose the baby, before it had even died, I felt 100% sure that my next pregnancy would be easy, healthy, and uneventful.  I hope I'm right next time, too.
  • I felt like something was wrong.  I had never worried about m/c until  two weeks after I got the bfp (the first two weeks were all hopes and dreams - imagining planting bulbs in the yard while in early labor (in Nov.) so that we'd have pretty spring tulips, envisioning nursing our LO at the Thanksgiving dinner table, etc).  Then one night I woke up with a nightmare about m/c'ing and was having sharp shooting cramps.  From that night on, I worried.  The cramps worsened, but there was no bleeding.  The dr gave me an early u/s and I measured three days behind and there was a gest. sac and yolk (expected at that point).  Came back a week or so later when we expected to see h/b and there had been no development.  That entire time between u/s, I knew something was wrong.  It was not a shock at all when there was no h/b.  
  • I kept telling my dh like 2days b4 my appointment that I thought something was wrong. He kept reassuring me I was fine. The day I got to the dr's office, I was so sick and so nervous that I sat in the parking lot trembling. Dh was having to calm me down before I even knew what was wrong.

    It didn't hurt any less though---I was so devastated when the u/s tech told us that it didn't look good.

  • At first I felt like everything was going to be alright, but the day before my appointment I suddenly decided that this pregnancy must be ectopic...I researched ectopics and decided that since I hadn't had pain, it was going to be ok. The next day, there was no heartbeat. Definitely foresight...but the wrong "diagnosis".
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  • For some reason, I was really obsessive about reading anything m/c related before I had any indication there was anything wrong.  The second I saw spotting (which was very light and nothing anyone would be concerned about), I knew it wasn't going to turn out well.  I told my husband two days before my first appointment to brace himself for bad news.

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    4 early losses 2009, 2010, 2015.  Baby #1 born 2/13/11.  
  • The first time: No way. I was scared and all, but at my core, I never really thought I would lose my baby. I got little twinges and uneasy feelings, and looking back, those might have been some warnings from somewhere, but I was quick to brush them aside.

    This last time: I knew almost right away, and even though things kept progressing, in my heart, I knew we would never hold our Pumpkin.

  • I chose other.

    I always had it in the back of my head as my family has a lot of history of miscarriage.

    However, after my first appointment when I should have been in the mid-7 week range showed early 5 weeks and no hb and then two days later the doctor's nurse sending me for an immediate u/s after the doc had first causually said to just come in the next week, I knew it was just a matter of time. Although it took 3 more weeks for the hb to actually stop.

    BFP #1 9/23/09. Missed MC 10w3d D&C 11/3/09.

    BFP #2 4/13/10. Bridget born 12/28/10

    BFP #3 Finn born 8/11/15


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  • with the one in 2008, I did. I knew something wasn't right.
    MY FOUR ANGELS... M/C 12/26/02 AT 4 WEEKS M/C 12/31/07 AT 12 WEEKS, D & C M/C 12/5/08 AT 9 WEEKS, D & C ***BFP ON 3/26/09*** MARY REYNA BORN AND PASSED AWAY JULY 31ST, 2009 AT 23 WEEKS. GOODBYE SWEET BABY...I WILL MISS YOU FOREVER. ***AFTER 17 WEEKS ON BEDREST*** Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I had a dream about 3 weeks after we found out I was pg,  that I was telling people I was K/U and then at some point in the dream someone said to me. "Oh by the way you really aren't, HA HA" I woke up in the morning in a panic and took a test. The freaky thing was that when we went to the doc at 10 weeks they told me growth was only measuring 5 weeks 5 days and if I count from my O day on my chart it's almost the exact day from that dream. I was then totally freaked!!!  

    Second time I never really felt pregnant although my levels were going up so I knew it was doomed from the start.

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  • My first one, no.  I honestly thought everything was going okay.  We had two sonograms done and both times the baby had a visible heartbeat and during the 2nd one the baby was bouncing around.  My intense morning sickness had me a little worried, but I truly believed that everything was going to be okay.  My mother had problem free pregnancies, as well as both of my grandmothers.  So, why not me?

    My 2nd one I felt wasn't going to happen.  I just knew that deep down inside I was going to lose this one and it was going to be soon.  But I still allowed myself to get close to the situation and fall in love with being pregnant again.  I don't regret doing that.

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  • I knew something was wrong.  I literally kept forgetting I was pregnant.  I started spotting at 5 wks and told DH I thought I'd have a m/c.  He didn't believe me because I spotted with DS and everything turned out ok, but for some reason I KNEW everything was ok with that pregnancy.

    Even after I saw the hb at 7 weeks, I still kept telling DH I didn't think this baby was going to make it.  When it was confirmed at 10 weeks that the baby had recently stopped growing I wasn't surprised.  Sad, of course, but I felt like I knew it from the getgo.

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  • I had absolutely no idea.  When I went in for my first u/s at 8wks and they told me they suspected it was ectopic I didn't believe them.  Everything I read about EP said there would be symptoms and I felt nothing.  I just could not wrap my head around how this could be possible.
    ectopic 2/09 - 8wks chemical pregnancy 9/09 - 5wks missed miscarriage 2/10 - 6wks miscarriage 8/10 - 9wks miscarriage - chromosomal abnormalities 7/11 - 8wks Last period 10/18 IUI #3 10/29 BFP 11/12
  • The first time: I knew when my second HPT was much fainter than the first.

    The second time: 100% blindsided. Everything was going exactly textbook. I had all the symptoms.  (Raging m/s, in particular. It hurts when people say m/s is such a good sign).

    The third time: I knew right away, but it was such a weird situation considering I had been bleeding for two weeks (I thought it was my period that was lasting too long) and tested when the nurse suggested it. I wasn't surprised to see my empty ute on the u/s that time around. 

  • imageShellShockedMama:
    I knew immediately when I got the BFP. something in my gut told me something wasn't right.
    same here.  when I saw the US and saw the HB, I still knew.  something deep inside told me that this wasn't going to last
  • imageShellShockedMama:
    I knew immediately when I got the BFP. something in my gut told me something wasn't right.

    Ditto, isn't it odd?

  • I had no flipping clue that I would lose the first one.  I had every symptom imaginable.  The second one never felt right from the second the line appeared.
    4/08 BFP resulted in m/c
    8/08 BFP resulted in m/c
    3/09 Polyp removed and dx MTHFR (both copies)
    6 Clomid cycles, all BFN
    5/09 IUI#1 with Clomid=BFN
    6/09 IUI#2 with Clomid=BFN
    8/09 IUI#3 with Clomid=BFN
    IVF#1 = BFN
    IVF#2 = BFN
    IVF#3 ET 2 Grade A blasts 11/16/11
    Beta #1: 485
    Beta #2: 2,495
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  • imagelunatwo:
    I had no flipping clue that I would lose the first one.  I had every symptom imaginable.  The second one never felt right from the second the line appeared.

    this. When I started bleeding again this weekend I was like FFS. I hate being right.

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  • It was a complete shock to me.  I had no loss of symptoms or anything that would have tipped me off.
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  • Yep, from the minute I got the +HPT, I knew something was wrong. I had been totally stressed out and I figured my stress would have affected the baby. At my first OB appt, they went over everything and said they were sending me for blood work and that my first u/s would be after my betas were 79,000! I went for my betas and the nurse called me back to schedule the u/s for the following week. Since my betas were high, I allowed myself to relax and get excited only to find out at the u/s about the blighted ovum.
  • I got pg the first month of trying, and thought that was too good to be true.  It was.  I also had this bizarre thought of not wanting to "waste time" and wanting to get started on the next cycle trying....which made no sense, since I was still pg and had no symptoms to indicate anything was wrong. 

    Yet, when I had spotting at 6 weeks, I didn't worry because I know that spotting can be normal.  So I think it was just weird feelings all around.

     
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  • I knew.

    When I was pregnant with my DS I shouted it from the rooftops at like 6 weeks. This time, I only told people after I saw the HB at 8 weeks and even then I only told close friends and immediate family. There was something about the 12-week mark that scared me.

    I just knew something was wrong before I ever even spotted (at 12 weeks - 5 days before the 12-week scan).

     

     

    Momma to three boys: Henry - 4yo Alex - 18mo Jack - born 2/23/12 at 20w due to ruptured uterus (previa and accreta resulting in hysterectomy) He only lived here on Earth for an hour, but he will live in our hearts forever. m/c #1: sept '09, m/c #2: july '10
  • I had no idea I was pregnant until I had some spotting.  It was really too early to be AF, so I went to the ob's office.  The CNRP wasn't confident that I was PG, and I hadn't done an HPT.  So, they did an HCG level.  I called the next morning, and the nurse said "you're pregnant!"  I was estatic and thrilled.  But as this was my first pg, and hadn't really been on the boards at all before that, I wasn't even thinking about the possibility of m/c or even doubling betas.

    I went back Monday for a 2nd beta, and sure enough, it was dropping.  *sigh*  The worst part of it was that when the CNRP called with my 2nd beta results, I saw the ob's office on my caller id.  I was at work, so I scurried out of the area near the exam rooms and went into the office.  I said "I'm so shocked and surprised, but really happy."  That's how I answered the phone with her...and she said, "Don't be so happy just yet."  What a sh*tty way to tell someone they are going to m/c.  

    Later, I asked the receptionist to flag my chart that I never want to see or speak that that CNRP again.  Period.  So, I answered "no," I knew nothing was wrong, and got way too excited too soon.  When we get our second BFP, I'm going to be so much more cautious and reserved.  

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  • I wish I had.  But I had no clue.  Full-blown pg symptoms, no cramping, no spotting, no heartbeat.

     

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  • As soon as the u/s tech saw that I was dilated and effaced at 18 weeks, I had a sinking feeling I wasn't going to last full term. 
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  • I picked other b/c at our 1st ultrasound we saw a HB.  It was slow and irregular, but I just "knew" that everything was going to be ok.  I'd even had dreams that I was pg w/ triplets before the u/s. 

    Even a week later, when I started spotting and went into the ER, the doc said that things looked good (no HB, but it could be early).  Then the next day it was all over and I had a complete, natural m/c.  

    I guess I was in denial.  

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    miscarriage at 8 weeks - August 2009
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