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TTC After a Loss
Telling people your pregnant after a loss.
I was just curious what everyone's thoughts are on telling people you are pregnant after you have had a miscarriage before. I tend to like to be in private when I grieve. But I know if I got pregnant again it would be hard for me to not tell people. But I know I would kick myself if things didn't go so well again. What did/ would you do? Would you wait till after the 1st trimester or no?
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Re: Telling people your pregnant after a loss.
With the + last week I told you ladies, DH and my BFF because I was too excited. Then the afternoon came and I started bleeding and it sucked to tell what happened.
Next time it will be DH, you ladies, and the Dr. and that is it until I am out of 1st tri.
We told our parents right away and our sibs once we had seen the HB this last time. Sadly, loss can happen at any point, and we needed their support when we discovered that we were going to lose this baby as well.
Then I threw a temper tantrum on FB, so everyone and their mother knows about the loss now. But I wouldn't advise that particular course of action.
We will prob. tell the families right away again, beacause we are all very close, and wait until after the NT to tell everyone else.
BFP #1 2-8-09 Natural M/C 6w1d 2-19-09
BFP #2 5-28-09 C/P 6-1-09
BFP #3 10-30-10 Natural M/C 12-8-10
BFP #4 1-16-12 EDD 9-18-12 Stick baby stick!!
Same here! Only my DH and you ladies will know. I don't even plan to tell anyone at work until I obviously start to show. (Unless I outed myself by them lurking on this board which I do not know of).
Will shout if from the rooftops here on the boards. But we won't tell anyone else until 14-16 weeks. My loss was discovered at 12 w 3 days, so I'm not going to be comfortable until a few weeks after that.
BFP #2 01/10/10 M/C 01/31/10
BFP #3 12/24/10 M/C 01/20/11
BFP#4 07/18/11 EDD: 03/24/12
Natural miscarriage - April 2009 ~ We love you, 'Blueberry'
Lydia, born July 12, 2010
Labor buddy to Kelly0615
After planning our wedding for almost 1 1/2 years- we became pg 3 months prior. We announced our pg @ our wedding... so, along w/ the fact that I was 6 months when we lost Haleigh- EVERYONE know I was pg.
I don't know if we will tell people or not. Our problem isn't getting KU- or even holding on to pgs... it is having healthy pg's that are viable. I guess time will tell...
We waited with DS, we waited with the baby we lost (and didn't tell too many people after the fact) and we'll wait with the next.
We liked having the secret to ourselves for awhile.....and our families tend to make things unecessarily stressful.
12 weeks (technically like 8-9 wks after u find out) is not that long to wait....not for me anyway. I'll be waiting until after 1st tri.
i have mixed feelings. on one hand, i don't want some people to know because i don't want to deal with the questions, especially because we don't have many answers right now (not measuring right, haven't seen a fetal pole or heartbeat yet, etc). but on the other hand, because the pregnancy has been so stressful, i want other people to know... so far, i told my family and a few close friends. but i'm sure more people suspect thanks to my not so subtle facebook updates...
With our first, we told everyone at 9 weeks because of a blbbermouthed in-law. This time though, I'd be happy calling everyone after we deliever the baby happy and healthy.
It's to hard telling everyone about a loss, it's awkward and hurts. If I have my way, most people won't know for a very long time.
When I have a crying baby in my arms. Or when they ask. Whichever happens first.
I was only going to tell my family this time and I didn't even get a chance to do that. So screw it. Until my big fat belly appears, it's all mine.
My Blog
I had two early U/S b/c of the previous loss, and my doctor put me on modified bedrest and took me off travel, so I had to tell work right away. We pretty much told people b/c a) we need all the prayers we can get and b) in the case of another loss, we didn't want to be alone in grieving. So that's where it stands right now. Although I refuse to post anything on FB!