1st Trimester

I think I have to break the news to my boss today...

I'm really nervous since I'm only 9 weeks and I want to wait until 12, but I manage a big team working on a big project at work and there's talk of moving some team members off the project and changing resources around.  I feel obligated to let them know, but I'm still really scared that I'm early in my pregnancy.  I don't expect my boss to be supportive, but I also don't feel it's fair for decisions to be made about moving resources around without her knowing.  What do you think, should I bite my tongue and wait, or let her know now?    Ugghhh!!!!  I barely slept just thinking about it!

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M/C Nov 9, 2011 at 11 weeks.... We love you & miss you Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

Re: I think I have to break the news to my boss today...

  • I'd wait but then again I'm not exactly the moral police. GL!
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  • This is tough, I felt the same way with my 1st pg.  Told my boss very early on and everyone on my team knew by 14wks.  I thought that would give them plenty of time to transition things.  It was a disaster, all it did was annoy people that I would be gone and they didn't use the time to appropriately shift things.  

    This time I realize that even if I wait until 18-20 wks they have PLENTY of time to make changes. 

    Don't feel obligated to tell, management wouldn't give you the same courtesy if there were changes 9 months ahead for you. 

  • I think you need to tell when you feel you have to.  I always intended to not tell my boss until around 12 weeks.  Then I found myself feeling way more sluggish than I had anticipated because symptoms hit harder than expected. I wound up telling her at around 7 weeks just to be on the safe side. It was time for me to get observed and I wanted her to know that I may not be as energetic as I usually am.  I also had a few co-workers who had already guessed and I didn't want my boss to hear it from someone else first.
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  • imageka2005:

    Don't feel obligated to tell, management wouldn't give you the same courtesy if there were changes 9 months ahead for you. 

    Very good point!

  • I was going to wait until 12 wks but ended up telling my boss at around 8 b/c I needed time off to go to the Dr., I wasn't my usual energetic self, and some co-workers had already guessed b/c I had put on a little weight, etc. so it was just easier to put it out there.  My boss is very nice and he was really happy about the news.  If your boss is a troll, which it sounds like she might be, then I agree with the post about not feeling obligated to tell.  Like they mentioned, not all employers would tell you if they could foresee some sort of change or issue that you would be encountering within the next 9 months.
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  • THANK YOU so much ladies, your advice is so helpful.  I decided to wait to tell.  You're right, my management wouldn't tell me months in advance of an expected change.  Plus, I was feeling awful that my boss (who isn't the nicest person in the world) would know before most of my family & friends.  I'll see how I feel about telling her at 12 weeks......  Whew - a HUGE weight was just lifted off my shoulders!Smile
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    M/C Nov 9, 2011 at 11 weeks.... We love you & miss you Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I'd wait until you are comfortable regardless of projects, resource moving, etc.

    DD1 born 5/24/10.

    Missed M/C at 14 wks Feb 2012.

    DD2 born 5/14/13.

    Missed M/C at 9 wks July 2015.

    Expecting someone new 4/17/17.
  • I would wait.....you dont want to be taken off of a project just because you're pregnant.

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