Help me out of this funk (feeling really down mentioned)

BabyMimi · November 2009

I know I have mentioned this on here before: my SIL is pregnant. It would be one thing if we had a decent relationship but we don't. If I were to tell you the whole background I would be typing all day so I will just say that from the moment she started dating DH's brother, she has been very competitive with me. We have gone through stages where we haven't even spoken because her awful attitude led me to avoiding her at all costs. Now that she is pregnant, her facebook page is all sunshine and butterflies (so not her, she is usually a negative nancy) and I can't STAND it! Logically, I know that it she is just enjoying her pregnancy and not even thinking about trying to stick it to me but for some reason it is really bothering me. Why do mean people like her get to enjoy a worry free pregnancy and nice people like me and DH have to go through a loss and when we are pregnant we will be so worried that something will happen. I hate being a jealous person (it is so not me) and I hate feeling like this. I just want to get my own BFP so I have my own LO to focus on and I can forget about her...

Addicted2thenot · November 2009

I am sorry (((HUGS))) , life is just not fair if it was none of us would be on this board.... but we are. When you do get your BFP you will appreciate it that much more ( I know I will), until then at least you have a nephew on the way, it just stinks that you have too see his meanie mom to see him.

TravelinMama · November 2009

I'm sorry. Life sucks sometimes. *hugs*

bebeblues · November 2009

Uh, if by competitive SIL u mean----buys a wedding dress similiar to yours, buys a car bc u bought one, buys landscaping bc u did, paints her living room and kitchen bc u did---oh, and my MOST FAVORITE---GETS KU bc ud did!! (This happened w/my SIL not ONCE, but TWICE!!!)....then yeah--I understand the competitive SIL. They're royal pains in the butt! (Sad thing is, I love mine dearly if she'd just grow the freak up and stop trying to do/have what I do/want).

uh---so if u feel the need to share---feel free to share a long pm w/me---also, Travers has one of those greedy/selfish SIL's, so maybe u can hit her up too!

First off---HIDE her fb stats, I did that w/my SIL and it's WORLDS better already.

Second---I avoided discussing the pregnancy/baby stuff w/her to the point I think she finally got the hint and we now have a "don't ask-don't tell" relationship---maybe u should try that.

Third-----TTCAL makes ALLLL of us this way to a point. I'm not "that kind of person" either. I never thought I'd be bitter or jealous of someone who's ku. I also thought it would be "fun" to get to ttc for awhile---ya' know for a few months like they make it out to be soooo fun in the movies---yep, not feelin' that!

Last.........you gotta hang in there. This was ur first cycle back at ttcal. Don't hit urself or get upset yet.

ACM1616 · November 2009

I don't exactly feel your pain, I only have 1 SIL, and they had their first son before I even met DH (they now have 2 boys)... but I do know how hard it is to have babies and pregnant women in the family. My sister has 3 kids, the youngest is just turning 1 next week, and my brother has 2 kids. Not only that, I have 2 close friends who are pregnant with number 2 - that's going to be 2 kids for both of them since i've been TTC! Life is just soooo not fair sometimes! But your time will come soon, and then you can forget about her petty life.

PeetiePie · November 2009

My advice is to hide her on FB. It's too tough to have to see all that. I hid a ton of "friends" from college on FB and recently deleted a bunch. It made me fee a whole lot better!

(((hugs)))

nikkinoodle_528 · November 2009

i feel your pain my sister is like this. i love her but she makes me crazy! she is due in feb and is constantly posting about it on fb and calling me to talk about her u/s. it is so difficult when it is your family and not some friend you can avoid talking to for the next few months. but i agree w/ pp to hide her fb status, at least then you don't have to think about it when she isn't around. it is hard for any of us not to be jealous don't let it get you down. sending love your way...

grr_aargh · November 2009

I'm sorry. I don't know how to get you out of your funk because I'm in one too. I'm supposed to spend Turkey Day weekend with my bro and his knocked up hasn't been to the doctor still smoking 19 yo baby mama. It makes me want to barf.

Don't get me wrong, I love my bro and I don't know his girl well enough to like or dislike her. But they're young with no degree, discernable income, or real plan. We have degrees, incomes, and a plan and no baby. It's so fundamentally unfair.

ERICA21779 · November 2009

Hi,

I am so sorry you're feeling like this. The only advice I can give is just ignore your SIL, avoid her as much as possible without alienating her because in the end she will be the mother of your niece/nephew who you will love and he/she will be a part of your life.......I didn't really get along with my SIL but I kept it civil so that I'd be a part of my nephews and niece's life. Someone suggested blocking her updates on FB, I would definately try that and it may alleviate some of the sadness if you're not forced to have her updates in your face everyday!

I hope you feel better and get your bfp really soon!

BabyMimi · November 2009

Wow thanks everyone! I'm glad I'm not the only one feeling this way.

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