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Is it proper etiquette to send a baptism card

If you are the Godparent?   DH brother is the Godfather, but he couldn't come to the baptism- so we had a proxy.   The Baptism was about a month ago.   So today, DH asks me if I got the pictures developed from that day and may we could send his brother one.   I said "well I have them one a disk, so you can pick one and print it and send it.' 

Then it dawned on me and I said "Your brother never sent a card for Nicholas baptism"  I was thinking why should I send a picture? 

So DH says "Well he doesn't know to send one and Karen (the wife) wouldn't know enough to tell him that's the proper thing to do because she wouldn't think to send one either" 

I'm like "What?!  He's the Godfather, how can he not know it's common knowledge to send a card?!  I'm not even asking for a gift, just a card would have been nice-geez!"   My dad's freakin' co worker sent us a card and a check too!.

So let me ask you this- if you were invited to a Christening(Godparent or not) and couldn't make it, wouldn't you at least send a card?  

 

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Re: Is it proper etiquette to send a baptism card

  • If I was invited as a guest, I would at least send a card (I might not send a gift if we aren't close -- cash is tight these days).  But if I were the Godparent?  Of course I'd send a card and gift!  
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  • We attended in person for our Godson's baptism, and brought gifts for him and his parents along with a card.  Unfortunately, his parents didn't seem to know that it's tradition to give the Godparents a little something, so we felt a little odd giving them what we'd gotten them.

    We will certainly be expecting cards from everyone who is invited to our child's baptism. 

  • Yes, I'd send a card and gift if I was invited to a baptism and if I was the God parent my gift would be a bit more generous than if I was just an invited guest. Is there a chance your BIL is waiting to give a card or gift when he does see your ds?  Maybe during the holidays?

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  • AT LEAST a card. Maybe you can send a picture thank you note to others who attended or sent cards and he would happen to see their's? (mutual relatives)
  • imageJillRock96:
    If I was invited as a guest, I would at least send a card (I might not send a gift if we aren't close -- cash is tight these days).  But if I were the Godparent?  Of course I'd send a card and gift!  

    Well I wouldn't hold my breath about getting a gift.  But a card would have been nice. 

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  • I would send a card and a gift.

    I wouldn't make even so much as a ripple, let alone a wave, in my family over something like not getting a card.

    Obviously you picked this person to be a Godparent to your child because he has many wonderful qualities - why nickpick over his failure to go to Hallmark?

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  • imagelaura&dan05:
    Yes, I'd send a card and gift if I was invited to a baptism and if I was the God parent my gift would be a bit more generous than if I was just an invited guest. Is there a chance your BIL is waiting to give a card or gift when he does see your ds?  Maybe during the holidays?

    Oh if you knew my BIL you would know how funny this reply is.   According to DH, BIL has never EVER gotten Christmas or Birthday gifts for ANYONE in the family- only for his wife.   He just doesn't have the mentality that he should get gifts for family (like his own mother-when she was alive and brother).  I have been with DH for 7 yrs and we have never gotten a Christmas card from them or even a box of chocolates.    I seriously would die of a heart attack if BIL sent a gift (baptism, Christmas, or birthday). 

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  • imageRoxBride:

    I would send a card and a gift.

    I wouldn't make even so much as a ripple, let alone a wave, in my family over something like not getting a card.

    Obviously you picked this person to be a Godparent to your child because he has many wonderful qualities - why nickpick over his failure to go to Hallmark?

    Oh I'm not going to say anything to BIL.  

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  • Oh, and incidentally, Nicholas is GORGEOUS!!
  • i would send a card but i would NEVER expect a man to send a card -- no way... that's just not how they work....and i wouldn't be upset about it either.
  • imageGoldie_Locks_5:
    i would send a card but i would NEVER expect a man to send a card -- no way... that's just not how they work....and i wouldn't be upset about it either.

    Yeah you're right.  Men don't think that way.   Oh well I'm over it.

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  • imageMeepit:
    Oh, and incidentally, Nicholas is GORGEOUS!!

    Thanks! 

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  • imageMeepit:
    Oh, and incidentally, Nicholas is GORGEOUS!!

    Thanks! 

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