3rd Trimester

Refusing Hospital Visitors

Am I the only one who doesn't want a plethora of hospital visitors after I give birth? I feel really mean even thinking it -- but, I'm having flashbacks of my tough recovery after the birth of my first child and and the experience of having visitors come left and right and having to plaster on a smile each time was horrible.

Friends are already beginning to request phone calls of our daughter's arrival so that they can come visit ASAP. Any advice on how to politely say No?  

Re: Refusing Hospital Visitors

  • Don't say anything.

    Just don't call.

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  • I don't really want a ton of visitors, but I feel bad turning people away. So I've decided to only allow visitors when I'm not sleeping or breastfeeding. If someone cares enough to visit me, I would hate to turn them away.
  • Don't call, and then when they ask, just say you weren't feeling up to guests.  It's not polite, but you'll get your wish.
  • Our hospital has a new policy which means I dont really have to worry about that!
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  • This is my third, and I would def. not want visitors either. Luckily though most hospitals are restricting all visitors during flu season. I talked to mine last night and now they are down to only one support person/visitor the entire time, which means husband only and no one else.
  • Blame it on your hospital.. or you?can say that you just would rather not have visitors until you get home (or later in your hospital stay).?

    Most people will understand, if not, use the hospital. They won't mind :) ?

  • I have the same issue. My parents will be driving up and DH will be there. I have a coworker that works in the hospital and another coworkers sister who works in the hospital that will visit, which will be nice, and if another coworker comes up that will be nice too. I have a small group of friends who might come, and one I know will stay forever. I went with her to visit our other friend when she had a section with her baby 5 weeks early and we were there FOREVER. She just doesn't stop talking. Its nice to have visitors, but people need to know when to leave. So, I'm hoping its just my family and a few coworkers and thats it. The hospital has changed the policy to one visitor, so I'm planning to tell some friends this and hint that they can't come up. They can visit me a week or so later at home, I don't want a ton of visitors right away anyways. If I have to, I'll tell the nurses I don't want visitors except the ones I've listed. 

     

    ETA - we also plan not to announce it quickly, we'll wait until the day im ready to go home and hopefully avoid visitors that way. 

     

  • I don't blame you, We have already let friends know that we want some time after the baby is born to bond. This is our first and we want to take as much time as we need as a family. Everyone was very receptive and understanding. It's hard not to make anyone mad but this is a time that your family get to decide on.
  • I agree. I don't like a lot of visitors right after birth. I have waited 9 (10) months to meet this baby and I am not willing to hand them over just yet. I enjoy the quiet with me DH and my children.
  • I'd just say "when we are ready for visitors you'll be the first to know". And leave it at that.
  • With hospital restrictions on visitors, just use that excuse. Mine will only allow 2 at a time after the birth. I will not have DH gone that long so other people can see LO.
  • I also do not want any visitors. Last time I was on bedrest after labor because of complications. I had no choice but to stay in bed because I was hooked up to so many machines. Needless to say my MIL came in with an entire group of people. This time I am telling people to stay away. If they need a reason it will simply be that I need to rest and recoup this time.

  • I'm not calling our parents even until LO's here so we can have alone time. You can tell your friends that because of H1N1 the hospital doesn't want accessory visitors.




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    Proud Mama to Mickey (12.03.09) and Nemo (06.06.13)

  • Most hospitals are changing the visitor limits now.  Ours is setting it at two and only the same two are allowed for the entire stay, and they have to be over 25.  No visitors allowed to be in the waiting room because they are not allowed in the room anyway.  The two visitors will be banded and scanned to come in and out:)
  • I have just told certain visitors that because of hospital policy in regards to the flu, they are only allowing such and such ppl related to the baby, or whatever. Seems to be working Stick out tongue

  • I am going to luck out.  The hospital i am delivering at is no longer allowing any visitors into the hospital under 18 which will reduce the number of visitors i have.
  • We're allowing immediate family only. We'll text / call those we want to know right away, but we've already made it clear that we don't want visitors in the hospital. Just tell people, end of story. It's your perrogative and they can deal.
  • I can understand after your first experience that you don't want many people visiting, but don't you want some people there to celebrate with you?  I have gone to the hospital to visit friends (only really close friends) and they are always excited and happy to show off the baby!!  I can understand that recovery can be tough, but I even if recovery is hard, I still want some my family (siblings, parents, etc...) and some close friends to come and visit.

    Daughter #1 - February 12, 2010 

    natural m/c March 11, 2011 at 8 1/2 weeks 

    Daughter #2 - January 11, 2012 

    Ectopic pregnancy discovered November 6, 2012 at 6 weeks

    Daughter #3 - January 19, 2014

    Started our exploration into the world of international adoption June 2012.  We have no idea what this is going to look like but we are excited to find out!

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  • imageLuv-a-Bug:
    I'd just say "when we are ready for visitors you'll be the first to know". And leave it at that.

    this exactly - and call them if you want to when the time comes. 

    We plan to allow visitors in and out only when we want them.

  • I don't want any.  I feel like that is the time for DH and I to bond with our child AND with the shortage of   H1N1 and flu shot I don't want to take the chance.  it's just too much.  They can see/ meet her when we are at home.
  • I don't want anyone there either honestly... possibly my mom... but other than that, my boyfriend is all I want. We haven't discussed this yet... but I don't see why anyone else would need to be there, IMO
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