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does time out work as a threat for anyone else?!

macaroni1979macaroni1979 member
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

i have put josie in time out (the pnp) a handful of times for hitting me and throwing things during temper tantrums. i put her in for about a minute, let her scream her head off and then take her out and we talk about not hitting/throwing things and why. yesterday, she lifted her hand to smack me in the face (which she thinks is funny) and i said "if you hit mommy, you have to go to time out." she pointed at the pnp and stopped. end of behavior.

i was happy that she thought about it and didn't hit me, but at the same time, i don't want to turn into a "just you wait till your dad gets home/do i have to pull over this car" mom. so is it okay to threaten time out? or do you just let the behavior continue and then put them in time out?

Josie Cailin 7/25/08 Asher Mason 7/19/10
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Re: does time out work as a threat for anyone else?!

  • AgrippaAgrippa
    It's different than "just you wait till your dad gets home" because the consequence of the action is immediate, not hours later.  I think in this case a warning is appropriate, particularly if you then follow through.  It's only when you dont' follow through that problems will occur.
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    I'd say giving DS the look or telling him that if he does X he'll be in timeout works about 60% of the time. The rest of the time he does it anyway and winds up in timeout.

    I also don't want to turn in to the empty threat Mom that DS laughs at so I definitely try to follow thru with every warning I give him.

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  • MarissaLinaeMarissaLinae member
    Yes, almost everytime I tell Jordin she will go in the corner if she doesn't stop she will freeze and look at me with this face that says "oh no...not the corner" lol. I don't really think of it as a threat. I just think of it as reminding her what the consequences of certain actions will be.
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  • thomas&lynnthomas&lynn member

    We still do hand holding timeouts so pretty much same thing......

    I do not give a warning for hitting, if she does it she gets her 60sec TO. She has lifted her hand in an implicit attack before and stopped......but only twice and with many many weeks in between each instance. If she had started to make it a habit we may have included that in our short short list of TO worthy infractions. (We only do it for hitting, and kicking). So I see use in giving a warning if you're about to add it to your TO list. But if you find yourself giving alot of warnings in a short period........I'd just do the TO, tbh.

     

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  • MattsWifey<3MattsWifey<3

    I think you're doing it right. You threatened and she didn't do it. The behavior changed.

    If you threaten with TO and she does it anyways, she needs to be put in time out. No empty threats ;)

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  • mabst196mabst196 member
    I've just started doing timeouts and I am hoping to see that she gets it soon. I say no now and she just laughs at me hysterically and keeps doing it.
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  • skoorbniborskoorbnibor member

    it sounds like you are doing time out correctly... 'if you don't stop this behavior, you will have to go into time out'

    Not a threat if you follow through!

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  • KT&JohnKT&John member

    A warning is part of the time out "technique" according to Super Nanny. Though my pedi said for hitting and biting etc. there should be no warning and the child goes straight to Time Out.

    The warning works 85% of the time for DD. Like yesterday, she would not come inside the house and was heading for the street. I told her to come inside. She did not listen. I told her she needed to listen to Mommy or she would have to go to time out and she ran inside the house :)

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  • lite-brightlite-bright member

    It sort of works for us, mostly because DD doesn't quite differentiate between time out as a threat or as an immediate order right now. 

    So when we say, "Do you need a time out?" or "If you do that again, you're going to get a time out!" she tends to run over to her time-out corner and put herself in, as if we had told her to go. 

    I don't think that's exactly what you're asking, but yes, it works. :) 

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