Who didn't give their child a pacifier??

NYGrlAtHeart · November 2009

I think it is so ridiculous when I see older children using them! My mom told me to not even use one cause she didn't with me or my brother. Is it hard NOT to use one or is it just a habit you get into?

SeaSoul · November 2009

well, we didn't have any intentions of using one but it was clear from the get-go that DS had a STRONG urge to suck. we used to give him our finger to suck on when he was fussy. we bought a paci at some point and decided to keep it on hand for "emergencies." that emergency came up in home depot one day when he was 2.5 months. then we used it a few times after that in similar public situations where he was freaking out. eventually, around 3.5 months i came to realize that he seemed to need to suck to be able to go to sleep, and being that i was going back to work, i couldn't always be there for him in that capacity (nursing). we started using a paci (post-nursing, if i was home) when he was sleepy and it was just what he needed. he still, at 10.5 months, only gets it when he's sleepy (meaning, about to go to sleep) or in the car. otherwise, he never has one. i know just what you mean about seeing older kids with pacis stuck in their mouth. i'm happy to say DS has not turned out to be one of them! he loves the paci in specific situations, but only them!

MewMew · November 2009

Well, it's only been 2 weeks but we haven't used one at all so far. My pedi said that all Isaac's sucking needs should be at my breast for right now. Until about 4 or 5 weeks. And when we do introduce one it will only be at night. I was going to try not to use one even at night, but I read that it reduces sids.

DH's cousin just pops a pacifier in her sons mouth alllll thhhheeee tiimmme. It drives me insane. She even does it when he is not crying. I don't get it.

DavezWife · November 2009

Ava is allowed her paci in her crib and carseat only.

At a very young age it became evident we had a choice of someday either taking away a THUMB, or taking away a paci.

Paci won.

sweetpea18 · November 2009

DD used one while she was in the nicu. It seemed to help soothe her. She was really agitated for the first couple of days because I was on mag sulfate. She took it once in awhile after she got home, but at about 2 months old, she decided that she didn't want it. She liked to suck her thumb more than the paci. Now, she plays with her paci when we are out shopping, in the car, etc. but she never actually sucks on it. Honestly, I would rather have her take a paci than suck her thumb. I can at least take the paci away from her when she gets too old for it. I can't take her thumb away from her!

muppet.fan · November 2009

We tried to give one to Elizabeth, but she preferred her fist and now her thumb from early on. We went through several kinds, but she wasn't into any of them. She'll sometimes take one if she's over tired, but that's it. So for us, it hasn't been hard not to use one.

But if she does start sucking her thumb more hard core, it'll likely be a lot harder to break her from that than from a pacifier!

PsychedForBaby · November 2009

We've offered it on several occasions, but very rarely will she take it. Now that she's got the beginnings of her first teeth, I think she finds more comfort in it rubbing against her gums when she sucks. I'm glad it isn't a "fixture" but there are times when it would be nice if she took one.

GretchenlovesMichael · November 2009

M&D don't use pacis. partly b/c i wanted to establish a successful nursing relationship in the beginning and was pretty adamant about nothing getting in the way of that, even pacis. but they did both try them a few times early on and neither really liked them. they seemed more stimulated than soothed by them. we did a lot of comfort nursing which was fine with me. still do sometimes. meanwhile M has started to suck his thumb at the beginning of naps but i am not especially worried about it at this point.

LIAngel · November 2009

At first I didn't want him to have it. But it seemed to help him sleep. I would like him to have it for naps, bed and in the car only. But I will give it to him in Church or the store if he looks like he's about to freak out.

However DH gives it to him any old time. I tell DH "You can't just stick it in his mouth any time you want". I am seriously going to reinforce the Only for sleep and in car situations.

LIAngel · November 2009

MewMew:

DH's cousin just pops a pacifier in her sons mouth alllll thhhheeee tiimmme. It drives me insane. She even does it when he is not crying. I don't get it.

My DH does this! I'm like "Helloooo! Stop just sticking it in his mouth for no reason".

Kristin&Frank · November 2009

Jackson is a Binky Baby. Our plan is no more binky at two. We're in the process of just having it at nap or bedtime. Joseph has no interest. He spits it out when we've tried to give it to him. I agree w/ pp's that I'd rather a binky than a thumb.

FWIW, SIDS rates may be lower for babies who sleep with pacifiers.

Germanwife2b · November 2009

I didn't want to even think about a paci until I had 6 weeks of good breastfeeding down. He got the paci once when he was 2 days old and got his PKU metabolic screening at the pedis office and that twit of a nurse stuck my baby 6-7 times in order to get enough blood (shouldn't take more than 1-2 sticks to get the job done). After 6 vweeks and the colic set in, I tried and tried to get him to suck on the paci, but he refused it. I was at my witts end and wanted him to have something other than me to soothe him. DH was adamant about Patrick not having a paci though, so I guess DH won that battle.

navyandviolet · November 2009

Ok, so I know you didn't ask who did give their DC a paci. But here I am a, what seems to be, lone voice. My DD loves her paci's. She got one from day one in the hospital, during her observation time in the NICU. She had a perfect latch from day one, refused bottles from 5 months on, BF until 17 months.

I was pretty against the paci before DD was born, if only to help on the BF front. But I never judged others who did it, even the older kiddo's. Man, I was so afriad to show the LC's that she was using a paci. But she had/has such a suck reflex that she would eat on my breasts until she would puke only to eat more. Then end up unable to breath b/c her nose would be so congested with puke and she would spend the entire next 24 hours screaming becuase every time she would lay down she wouldn't be able to breathe. The paci was the best choice for us.

And it still is. We attempted to give it only at bedtime/cars at 1 year but a couple stomach flu's later, we postponed that to around 20 months. Now she is really good about using it only at those times, but I must admit we will let her suck on it during a meal out, just to have a meal out. So I guess other's judge me/DD, just remember we are all parents doing the best we can, you will do things others will judge so remember that when you point your finger back. As far as attatchment objects, these paci's are it, no blanky, stuffed animal. So really we are right on par with everyone else developmentally, maybe just a less socailly accepted item, I guess. Oh well, she won't be using one in middle school.

Sorry if this seems a bit snippy, (as I read it back I seem defensive, and long, Whoops) but there is a point. I try my best, the other moms you see out and about are most likely doing the same. Just wanted to give support out there to the bump mom's who are on the other side of this topic.

jodyplustwinsx2 · November 2009

Out of my five kids, only two used a binky at all, and Alice is the only one who used it past a few weeks old. My other kids had no interest in one, but Alice had a strong suck instinct and wanted to suck all the time, so it helped her. I don't feel strongly about needing to take a binky away at a certain age. I don't get why they bother people so much, but to each their own. We keep hers in her bed now for naps and bedtime, but will also let her have one if she is overtired or upset. It's a comfort mechanism like anything else.

Also, like pp mentioned, the AAP recommends that infants sleep with pacifiers because it is linked to decreased SIDS rates.

MewMew · November 2009

navy&violet:

Sorry if this seems a bit snippy, (as I read it back I seem defensive, and long, Whoops) but there is a point. I try my best, the other moms you see out and about are most likely doing the same. Just wanted to give support out there to the bump mom's who are on the other side of this topic.

I don't think you were snippy at all.

kianew · November 2009

We never used one. We tried one a few times, but Dylan would just spit it out. That was okay by us!

skoorbnibor · November 2009

I am going to say the dreaded... 'just wait' because there were times I would have LOVED for Ethan to take one, just so he would stop crying when he was tiny. We didn't introduce one right away, because we were already struggling to get milk in, and we wanted any sucking to me on me!

; )

Maybe your baby won't want one... and mine didn't ever take one either, but it is really hard to know why an older child (and are we talking 2-3 here or 7?) is still using one.

I have a thumb sucker. I am totally ok with that. In fact, I love it! Some try to get their kids to stop thumbsucking, but not me, we are ok with it!

alchris · November 2009

I gave her one just a few times, and she really loved it, but I she wasn't latching so I was really hesitant to give her a paci more frequently. Plus I never gave her a paci overnight because I didn't want her to need one to sleep. By the time she latched well such that I wouldn't have worried about giving her a paci, she was used to not having it so I didn't want to start then! The last time I gave her one was when she was about 7 months old on an airplane, but it had already been at least a couple months since I had last given it to her at home. It helped a bit on that plane flight, and I forgot it on our next flight a month later so that was the end of it.

MayDayGirl · November 2009

Honestly you can't know until you have your baby. Some babies just NEED something to be sucking on to keep them happy. Others don't. DS never really needed one but we used it, then at 4 months he just stopped taking it.

na24 · November 2009

We didn't want to have them use a pacifier too much, if at all, but the nurses gave them to them both in the NICU and that was that. Honestly, from what I've read, it seems like the sucking helps them deal with pain and calms them down, and they needed that when they were being stuck with needles and had tubes up their noses and all of that. They both like their pacifiers still, and there are certain times of day when they both get them, but we're not going to let them use them long-term. And my little brother sucked his thumb until he was five, no matter what my parents did (e.g., the bad-tasting stuff on his thumb), so I'd rather have them hooked on a pacifier and be able to take that away than have them hooked on a thumb. Not that they necessarily have to suck on either one. My best friend's daughter refused a pacifier and was just never interested in sucking. My girls like them. Every kid is different.

crystalgirl · November 2009

We weren't planning to use one at all, but someone gave us one at one of my showers. We ended up breaking it out the first night home...lol!!! That said, though, DS never EVER developed a pacifier habit of any sort. He used it for an hour or two a day in his first few weeks; then we'd give it in the car, at church, and on the airplane. That was it. He quickly grew out of needing it in the car or at church (like, before 6 months old). At that point, he only ever used it when we'd fly... He has trouble falling asleep on airplanes (even at the breast), so the pacifier has been very helpful on those occasions. Other than on the plane, we have never let him sleep with one or have one at home, both of which I think are important in terms of not forming a habit.

jenber77 · November 2009

I never saw the need for the pacifier when he was tiny, and then around two months old, I think, my little guy became a serious thumb-sucker. I don't mind, but as far as habits go, I imagine that one will be even harder to break.

roaringrock · November 2009

Kristin&Frank:
FWIW, SIDS rates may be lower for babies who sleep with pacifiers.

this is EXACTLY why we started using one at night. sleepy time and visits to the pedi.

Alli321 · November 2009

DH was against it but I gave it to her. Out of nowhere she just stopped taking it (I think it was around when she was 4 months old). It was hard at first at night because she used to suck on her pacifier, but I found it is so much easier. Before the pacifier would fall out and she would start screaming and I'd have to run in and put it back in her mouth, but with her not taking that I didn't have to do that. When she is really tired she will suck her thumb to go to sleep, but I am not too worried because she only does it when she is really tired and trying to go to sleep and no other time.

DotGrl03 · November 2009

LK flat out refused to take one. I told myself in the beginning that we wouldnt use one - same reasons as you - but there was a night of desperation (or 5) that I tried it. She isn't a thumb sucker either.

:shrug: To each baby their own.

blondie75 · November 2009

Never had to use one thankfully.

ejgballerina · November 2009

I was against it at first only because I saw what my brother-in-law went through trying to take it away from my niece when they used to live with us. It was a nightmare. For the first couple of months, I let DS use me as his pacifier and it helped to build up my supply. Now , especially when he's just exhausted and not hungry, he wants to self-soothe with his paci to sleep. I offer a pacifier before bed and usually that is the only time he will take it. If it's during the day, he wants nothing to do with it. We plan on completely weaning around 6 months or so, but we'll see.

LovingLife_06 · November 2009

We tried to give them to DD but she wasnts nothing to do with them. There are times I wish she would have taken them. It's real easy to want to shove one in their mouth when they are screaming and nothing can calm them down. I don't think its hard not to use one, you come up with other ways to calm them down.

LucyPevensie · November 2009

We used one. Worked out great. Jack decided on his own that he didn't like it anymore, around 9 months. So, we don't use paci's anymore.

It is hard not to use one. I would not be afraid to do so if I were you. It's really not that big a deal to get rid of. People will have PLENTY of advice for you. Just do what works for YOUR baby.

nicolita14w · November 2009

DS takes it mainly in the car and at night. It helps him go to sleep.

I read that babies have a strong urge to suck until about 10 months, and that it is soothing to them.

I don't see it as a big deal at all. We will start trying to wean him off sometime between 1 and 2, but honestly it doesn't concern me that much if it takes a while.

However, my little sister was so attached to her paci that she sucked it till around age 5. She would hide them under her bed! *That*, I feel, was too much, but my mom was going through a very stressful divorce and going back to work after being a SAHM for 12 years, so she had more pressing things on her mind. And my sister turned out fine.

Smudges*Mom · November 2009

I really dislike seeing older kids out and about with pacis in their mouths. When I worked at a library, there was this little boy, who was three, and his mom who would frequently come in. He'd strut in, wearing his baseball hat, sunglasses, cowboy boots--and suckin' on a paci. Perhaps my feelings are stronger because I could not stand the mom. . . but still.

My LO was never very interested in a paci. He took one at first, when he was in the NICU (for all of 12 hours), but it is totally hit and miss--much more miss.

However, he is a finger/fist sucker. Personally, I'm totally good with it. My mom pointed out that when he is older and more acitve, the fingers will have to come out of his mouth when he is playing. Its hard to play trucks with your fingers in your mouth! But, when he needs them, he knows where to find them. Sure, it may be a habit we have to help him break when he gets older, but so is the paci habit.

IMO, let your baby be your guide. If your LO wants/needs a paci or fingers, they will let you know.

InACitySoNice · November 2009

We didn't and don't use pacifiers. Just something else to wean away from? Forget it.

somethingchangd · November 2009

I wasn't going to give one until BFing was established. Well, at 5 days he was on exclusively (pumped) bottles, so it seemed pointless to wait. We tried, he resisted. I've kept trying here and there ever since and he just has no interest. I ***really*** wish he would take one, though. I have become a human pacifier for him. I don't mind it sometimes, but it really would be nice to have another tool to soothe him.

Next baby (if I get one) is getting a paci on day 1.

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