TTC After a Loss

Someone talk me down...

Even though it was our Anniversary, I told DH that we could go over his parents after dinner so he could watch the Yankees with his brothers and his parents. Let me just say that his brothers wife is around 12 weeks pregnant. I have not see her since I found out but I warned DH that it might upset me considering that I should be 6 months right now.

1st of all, there was a framed ultrasound pic on my IL's mantle that felt like a kick in the gut when I saw it. Second, SIL has the cutest little baby bump. Third,  all she talked about was her headache, her backache and her constant hunger. IL's kept asking to get her things, if she was comfy, how she was feeling, etc.

DH KNEW that I would potentially be upset yet he still made a sarcastic comment about me not having a job. Maybe the comment would not have bothered me on a regular day but I was feeling sensitive so I got very upset. I wish none of this bothered me! I wish I could just be happy that my BIL and SIL are having a baby. More than anything, I want a BFP so I can be excited for myself too. My sensitivity basically ruined our Anniversary evening because DH and I had a big blowup in the car over him not being sensitive towards my feelings and now we are sitting on opposite ends of the couch not speaking. I just feel so low right now. Thanks for letting me vent... 

 

 

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Re: Someone talk me down...

  • oh sweets. i'm sorry. it's so hard when dh doesn't see how you are feeling, or how you may react, and honestly - boo hiss at ILs for acting like that.

    ugh.

     

    m/c#1 07/16/08 (11 weeks), m/c#2 10/10/08 (8 weeks). and then nothing since except every test possible (no answers). IUI#1 and #2: BFNs Super lucky to be buddies with Peetie. Our out of nowhere, surprise DD born 5/29/2011
  • *hugs* I'm sorry you had a hard night.
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
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    4 losses (cp Feb 28 09, mc April 9 09 (5w5d), mc Aug 10 09 (7w1d), d&c Apr 12 10 (grew to 6w3d, mc confirmed at 8w5d). RX: Overies PCOS (hormones normal) & Balanced Translocation of Ch. 7 & 13 (40-50% mc risk)

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  • I agree with everything mlmtgg said, and wanted to add Hugs.
  • So sorry you had a crappy night, and DH was a little insensitive to your feelings. Maybe you should tell him how you felt bout the evening. Might help him understand how to be more sensitive in the future.

    "Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway" ~John Wayne Pregnancy Ticker Grow Baby Grow!!! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • imagemlmtgg:

    oh sweets. i'm sorry. it's so hard when dh doesn't see how you are feeling, or how you may react, and honestly - boo hiss at ILs for acting like that.

    ugh.

     

    They are just excited but I wish they would think a little before they talk. There was an entire conversation about how "there are so many things you can't do when you are pregnant." like eat soft cheese or deli meat and how it's "out of control." I felt like screaming "I would follow every rule given to me if I could just be pregnant!" 

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  • imagemlwinkle:

    So sorry you had a crappy night, and DH was a little insensitive to your feelings. Maybe you should tell him how you felt bout the evening. Might help him understand how to be more sensitive in the future.

     I know this is what I should do but admitting how envious I am is hard for me. I don't want anyone to think I am that jealous girl. Thank God I can come here and vent or I might burst into tears. 

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  • imageBabyMimi:
    imagemlwinkle:

    So sorry you had a crappy night, and DH was a little insensitive to your feelings. Maybe you should tell him how you felt bout the evening. Might help him understand how to be more sensitive in the future.

     I know this is what I should do but admitting how envious I am is hard for me. I don't want anyone to think I am that jealous girl. Thank God I can come here and vent or I might burst into tears. 

    I know. My evening was much like yours. Spent with family and a 2 week old. What you are feeling is perfectly natural. We are lucky to have this board, not sure what I would do without it.

    "Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway" ~John Wayne Pregnancy Ticker Grow Baby Grow!!! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I am so so so sorry you had to go through that!!!!

    It makes me angry, because I could see segments of my faimly doing that!!!  They should have been considerate of your feelings!  I think that sometimes DHs just don't know/anticipate how hurtful things can seem to us because they deal with things differently. 

    Miscarriage 10/25/2009 Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
  • Thanks everyone! The support of this board really really helps.
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