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Intro and Question Re: telling 15 yo daughter about baby

Michaels_Girl07Michaels_Girl07
in 2nd Trimester

Hi everyone. I had my NT scan yesterday and they changed my due date back to the original due date which put me at 13 weeks and officially into the 2nd tri! Everything went great at the appointment so my DH and I decided to start telling people.  The first one on our list is, of course, my 15 year old daughter. She is also the one I am most nervous to tell (don't know why). She is an only child right now. Any suggestions? Part of me thinks she will be excited because she loves babies, but then I think about all the blended family issues and feelings she may have. Any pointers from parents going through this or perhaps you went through this as a child would be greatly appreciated.

TIA

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Re: Intro and Question Re: telling 15 yo daughter about baby

  • buckeyekibuckeyeki member
    I was the youngest of 2 until I was 17.  My dad and step-mom had my little brother then and at first I was a little upset but as time went on I got really excited.  I stayed with them a lot more to help with the baby and really had fun with him while I was still at home before college.  If her initial reaction isn't great just give her time - she'll come around.  Include her in all the planning and taking care of the baby too.  Good luck!
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  • SMCbride2bSMCbride2b

    I haven't personally gone through this, but here's something to keep in mind: Her first reaction might be disappointment, confusion, etc, but when the baby finally comes she could do a complete 180 and fall madly in love with her new sibling. When my parents had my youngest sibling, I was 17 and my siblings (twins) were 11. I was super excited, but my sister was unsure of the whole thing since she had always been the baby (by a whole 16 minutes) and with a new baby, the idea of a new puppy got nixed. However when our little Gracie came, Katie was like a little mother- they're very close now and Kate loves being a big sister.

    Good luck with spreading the news! And congrats!

    image Mommy to Anna Grace, born 4/25/2010 Pregnancy Ticker Anniversary
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  • lmpdjclmpdjc member
    I have a 13 year old daughter, so I know what you mean about being nervous to tell her, I was too, for some reason.  It wasn't a total shock to her, because we've been talking about maybe adding to our family.  I just said "Come here and sit with me, I have something to tell you" and she knew right away.  She said "No.  I don't want you to tell me" . We went back and forth a bit about her not wanting me to tell her and then she said "I TOLD you not to come back from your honeymoon pregnant!" Which made DH and I laugh, but she was teary eyed and moody for the rest of the night.  The next morning she came out of her room all excited about buying baby stuff.  She still makes negative comments sometimes, but she's excited, too.  It's such a balancing act!  Good Luck!
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  • serrill2serrill2

    I told my children at about 12 weeks and my daughter is 16.  I smiled alot and told her how happy we were, and her first comment was

    "Well Mom, that is alot to take in, I need a moment"  so then she sat there and said, "I really think that is terrific!"  "When are you due?" etc...  so yes.. it probably will be a shock but they get excited pretty quickly.  

    I make a point of discussing her stuff first, and not talk about the baby all the time.   I still take her shopping and we focus on her.  I didn't want her to feel threatened as she has always been my baby, my youngest.

    She is totally on board and wants to be a caregiver and be given responsibility.

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  • ScissorTailedFlycatcherScissorTailedFlycatcher member

    Ditto PP. My SKs are 5 and 7 and they were really excited. Because I know the reality of having a screaming baby will probably make their lives a little harder, we are doing everything in our power to include them in planning and brainstorming (even though most of their suggestions fit their age and we won't be naming the baby after a dog, for example, they still feel heard).?

    I would definitely recommend coming over to the Blended Families board. Many over there are pregnant right now and some of them have teenage DCs or SKs. We can help with this and just about any other issue comes up in a BF.?

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  • PickybodPickybod

    My DH was 15 yo when his parents had his little sister and his other sister was 13 yo.  It was a shock for him, but he adjusted very quickly once she arrived from the stories I have heard.  We wouldn't trade her for anything now and she's 15.

    It will be ok...just remember her first reaction will be one filled with shock.

    Good luck!

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