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Is it just me?

christysecchristysec
in South Florida Babies

Is it just me or is it rude to ask what someone's salary is?

My husband graduated from Law school and just got his first job as an Attorney and EVERYONE's question is how much is he making? How do I politely Not disclose this information? I have never asked someone how much they make so I can't believe my family and acquaintances asking this. Even after averting the question someone said to me "he must make around such and such amount" OMG get the hint Tacky, Tacky people.

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Re: Is it just me?

  • rach312rach312
    It's a tough one.  I think it's rude and tacky - but I could care less if people knew how much I make (maybe I feel that way because what I make is public record and if someone really wanted to know it's not that hard to find out).  I would make some kind of joke about it and say one million dollars - or sigh and say it's still not enough to pay back these loans. 
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  • melly&jimmymelly&jimmy
    Yeah - our family is tacky/nosey like that.  We usually give them an average - "between such and such".  It's none of their business.  I don't like telling people how much we make, its personal.  Plus, if you make more than them - then all of a sudden you're "rich" and more likely to be hit up for loans LOL!
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  • britishbride05britishbride05
    Say "enough to pay the bills!" and leave it at that.  That's what I say whenever I'm asked about DH!
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  • MrsJuneHawkMrsJuneHawk

    I don't think there is any malice behind it and a stranger asking is different than family asking.  People are genuinely interested in how much attorneys make because it is widely believed that they make a good living.

    Honestly, the question does not bother me when no malice is intended.

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  • cocojack10cocojack10 member

    I completely agree.  I think someone's salary is very personal.  The only ones that know what I make (besides DH) are my parents, but I'm fine w/ them know... but they don't inquire as to how much DH makes.

    I got a bonus last month (recognized publically at work), and a coworker actually asked how much it was for!  OMG, so rude.  I answered, "it was a nice gesture" and I think she got the hint.

    I agree pp, "enough to pay the bills" is a great answer, and hopefully they get the hint.  And if they keep questioning, I'd tell them "I don't go around asking u how much u make so I'd like the same respect."

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  • southmiamiwifejensouthmiamiwifejen
    I think it's really tacky to ask that, just like I think it's really tacky to just volunteer that information. I can't imagine flat out asking someone, "Hey, how much does your husband make?!" just like I can't imagine casually mentioning, "Oh, my husband makes X every year." Both scenarios creep me out a bit :/
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  • MellyMelBMellyMelB
    I think it depends on who asks it and how its asked. I give certain family and friends a little mmore leeway that virtual strangers. Whenever I have been asked this its in a, "If you don't mind, may I asked how much..." kind of way. Never in a, "Wow, you are a ____ how much do you make?" So, if its asked politely I can answer politely - if not then I get put off by it.
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  • christysecchristysec
    imageMrsJuneHawk:

    I don't think there is any malice behind it and a stranger asking is different than family asking.  People are genuinely interested in how much attorneys make because it is widely believed that they make a good living.

    Honestly, the question does not bother me when no malice is intended.

    You are right I'm sure there is no malice I just don't want to answer because they will judge "Oh that's a lot" or "He's an attorney and he only makes X" so its a loose loose situation i think I'll say "we're so grateful to be able to pay all of our bills especially all those student loans!"

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