Need help spilling the beans...

AlexJ217 · October 2009

Now that we have seen our little one and heard the hearbeat - we started discussing how to tell our parents. DH and I want to be fair to both sides and would really want to tell them in person. However, we live on the opposite side of the country.

I will see my parents in a week or so because I am going home to throw a bridal shower. However, DH will not be with me. It will be really hard not to tell my parents but I would like DH there with me. I always say that I want DH and my parents to be closer and I feel like this is important. On the flip side, how do I keep a secret that long? geez.

Both sets of parents are coming out for Thanksgiving. ILs will be coming November 21 and my parents are coming November 25. We could tell them the days they come out. Yes, ILs would know a couple of days early. But they will be sworn to secretcy. Meaning, I dont want my MIL calling all her friends, family, etc and announcing it before we have a chance to tell my parents. I dont think my parents would be upset knowing that his parents found out a couple days earlier. I just hope it doesnt come to pettiness of his parents getting mad they cant say anyting for a few more days. I worry too much! I know everything will be fine, I just worry. And thats the problem. I am trying to stay calm because I know the baby "feels what I feel" So I dont want to stress over this - I almost just want to call both sides tonight and spill the beans. But I know its nicer in person!

So what would you do?

synchrosally · October 2009

I vote for Thanksgiving! We told my ILs a few days before my parents and told my parents at Canadian Thanksgiving. It was fantastic to have everyone there!

Sept17.05Bride · October 2009

I would wait until Thanksgiving. I would also wait until your parents got there, and tell them all at the same time.

gmugrad9 · October 2009

I would have DH use his cell phone and put it on speaker and have my cell phone on speaker and call my parents and his and say this is the fairest way to do this. We have great news we're expecting.

I have found even when you tell someone not to say anything things can still happen. I told my mother not to say anything and they told their whole church which included my sister before I was able to tell her and her feelings got hurt.

We did tell my parents before we told DH's with both DD and this pregnancy but DH said that if I felt that I would need support of my family it was fine to tell them

KeepingFaith · October 2009

I would wait until thanksgiving! Its nice to have both of you there to tell your parents and his parents

MrsMoe07 · October 2009

Like you said in the beginning you want help strengthen the relationship between your parents and your husband and you wanted to tell everyone in person so I would wait until Thanksgiving. I totally understand wanting to spill the bean especially after hearing the heartbeat, but it'll be worth the wait.

NJBrideIn08 · October 2009

I would also wait til Thanksgiving when you can do it in person. I'm in a similar boat, where we'll be telling ILs a few days before telling my family, and will be swearing them to secrecy until my parents know.

Mrs Veitz · October 2009

i vote for THanksgiving....we told our families over Christmas with DS and DH's fam found out the night before my family did and it was fine. my mom was happy his mom already knew so she could call her!

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