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Babies: 3 - 6 Months
S/O BFing in public
I don't personally BF, but my sister did and I always felt she was very respectful of others. Would try to find a bathroom, cover up, etc. Well a while ago, before DS was born, DH and I went to the movies with some friends. The movies were packed so he was sitting right next to a woman who had brought her baby. The baby was probably only 2 or 3 months, and the movie didn't even start until 10. The baby was very quiet and well behaved for a while, until it was time to eat. Well, DH looks over and the woman is BFing in the theater completely uncovered. He was so uncomfortable and shocked. Just wondering if that is a little over the line or totally normal for those of you that BF.
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Re: S/O BFing in public
This. But only because it makes me comfortable. I don't care if someone around me is uncomfortable. I'm only feeding my baby!
I understand that you are only feeding your baby and if LO is hungry they have to eat, wherever you are. However, this woman was completely uncovered, she wasn't even wearing a bra, so her other side was just kind of hanging out. That is what made DH the most uncomfortable.
feeding your baby is one thing, letting it all hang loose is another!
Completely agree. My comfort is what I'm worried about. If it were me at the movies, I probably would have sat in the back corner but only because it would make me feel more comfortable. I don't really care what others think. Today I BF in a booth in the corner of a restaurant.
DD - February 2011
The uncovered part doesn't faze me.
But a 2 month old at a 10pm movie (or any movie really) doesn't seem appropriate. That would bug me more.
i don't think the point was the bf'ing in public... it was having both breasts fully exposed.
nobody sees anything wrong with both breasts being all out in the open like that?
unless you're bf'ing twins, i see no point in having both breasts out.
and 10pm is a little late for an infant to be out, let alone at the movies.
This. DH and I have no problem with bfing in public, it was more that the woman was sitting there fully exposed.
Ditto. Once you've nursed crammed into a tiny airplane seat next to a total stranger, there's no turning back.
I find it interesting that the OP said her sister was "respectful" of others. How am I being disrespectful if I nurse in public without a cover or hiding away in a dressing room? The only way anyone is going to see anything is if they are 2 feet away and staring at my breast. And then I would say they are the one being disrespectful, don't you think?
There is nothing obscene about BFing a baby.
was your other boob out as well?
I'm not referring to that, I'm referring to the OP's phrasing when she said that her sister was being "respectful to other" by nursing in a bathroom or with a cover. As if nursing outside of a bathroom or without a cover is disrespectful. It isn't.
And BFD if someone's other boob is out. Don't look. It's a nipple, we all have them. Even men.
Maybe breastfeeding rates would be higher, with corresponding public health benefits, if people weren't so prude about it. *shrug*
the nipple is one thing, an entire breast is another.
i'm not prude, i'm just considerate of others.
and before you all go "If you don't/never BF in public, then you wouldn't know," i have and i don't recall the need for BOTH boobs to be out for all to see (if they so chose to look).
I think the irony is that if there'd been a totally topless woman in the movie you were seeing, no one would have blinked twice.
I don't make "being respectful of others" my priority when I feed my child. If someone has a problem with catching a flash of my breast, they can deal with it. I've nursed on an airplane beside total strangers, including men, and didn't think twice.
Breastfeeding Counselor with Breastfeeding USA
Babywearing Guide ** Newborn Carriers
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Our culture in general is prude about breastfeeding. No one thinks anything of cleavage hanging out everywhere in the mall and on magazine covers, but people have a hard time separating the sexuality of breasts from their functionality. The intimacy of a mother nursing an infant makes many people uncomfortable. No one has a problem with people flashing their t!ts at Mardi Gras LOL.
I just don't care if I see someone's breast. Maybe it's because I used to work as a doula where I got up close and personal with breasts trying to help people initiate breastfeeding.
No, I don't take my boobs out completely when I nurse in public. I try to stay covered as much as I can. But I really don't get the big deal if you see someone else's breast while they are nursing.
Your initial post and your follow up posts are a bit disjointed. Initially you say the woman was BFing uncovered, and asked if that was normal. When some people responded that it was, you said, "Well she had her whole other boob hanging out too!" So, your initial query was not, "Is it normal to BF uncovered?" but rather, "Is it normal to uncover the breast not currently in use while breastfeeding?"
The answer to the former would be, "Yes, it's normal to BF without a cover." while the answer to the latter would be, "no, not so much"
Depends on where I am and the situation. At other peoples' houses usually no cover, if out in public I sometimes cover (patios/restaraunts), in the movie theatre I don't cover. It is dark in there, and you can't see much, and I usually go to Stars and Strollers performances anyway. I would never go to a bathroom (not very sanitary - would you want to eat in a bathroom?), and DD doesn't like the canopy anymore. I would rather risk exposing myself a little than listen to a hungry, screaming baby. IMHO it is a natural thing, and not uncommon here at all, so I don't cover. People can choose not to look. However, I don't do it openly in front of DH's family, and like I said about Restaraunts etc - I will cover if DD will let me, or find a quiter corner to do it so I don't offend too many people....but I also feel it is natural and people shouldn't be offended - in fact, I get offended when people say (or imply) that we should hide it, or go to a bathroom to feed our baby! If you don't like it then don't look. FWIW breasts are for breastfeeding - that is their purpose. There should be nothing offensive about a woman breastfeeding her baby...
Edit: I just read the whole story - being totally exposed is not the norm (however, here women are allowed to be topless in public)...but in the beginning I had a hard time BFing without lifting my shirt out of the way completely, so both breasts would be exposed.
Were there boobs IN THE MOVIE?
Funny how when there are, few of us object in the same way.
I can see why people are uncomfortable and modesty is good, but this is not a big deal. If we want to create a world where more moms BF, then we need to not act Puritanical about it, especially in public. Still, keep the girls in the shirt when not in use!!
And why did this woman take an infant to a movie, anyway? I don't understand why people do that. It's even worse when there are four-year-olds in R-rated movies.