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Pregnant after a Loss
Peach&Fireworks
member
Pregnant friend drank a margarita today - WITH tequila
Peach&Fireworks
member
We went on a pub crawl today for a friend's 40th birthday. Wife of the birthday boy decided to get a margarita with tequila at one of the bars. I was stunned!! This is her second baby - she KNOWS better. She also told me she would sneak cigarettes in her last pregnancy and also drank a few times. It just really makes me question her as a person and makes me wonder if I want to even be friends with someone like that. She even tried to tell me to order a drink. The closest thing I had to a drink was an Odules that tasted like ass. I did get a bartender to mix me a non alcoholic fruity drink and it was really good - but I drank water the rest of the time.
Tell me if I'm being a prude here about the tequila. I have heard maybe one glass of red wine occasionally but hard liquor?!?! And you should have seen the look on the bartender's face. My friend is 26 weeks pregnant so she is showing. I'm still just shocked over it. I could never do that.
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Re: Pregnant friend drank a margarita today - WITH tequila
I look at it this way, my grandparents smoked & drank while pregnant with my parents and my parents & their siblings are fine.
Now, I won't have a margarita (though is sounds nummy) but I've stolen sips from DHs beer and had a medium size glass of red wine. But if you friend has decided to do hard alcohol and smoke then that's her decision. And she'll have to live with the consequences if there are any.
Wow - what a winner... she isn't the selfish type at all is she... if she would have said that to me I would have told her about all of the harm she is doing to her unborn child, and in some states - like WI - I could call that in for child abuse... (not that I would but it is a statute here)
I wouldn't be able to be friends with her, but then again I guess I am a prude.
This exactly. I haven't had a single drop of alcohol, but I sure am looking forward to my PP margarita!
I agree that hard liquor during pregnancy is worthy of a side eye. Mixed drinks can be very deceiving about how much alcohol is really in them!
That said, I've had a few glasses of wine here and there, and a couple of beers during this pgcy- I only drank once during DS's, and that was champagne at a wedding. I think with your second pgcy, you become a little more lax about certain things (and yes, I'm saying this even after my two losses, which occurred AFTER DS).
I have been surprised how many people have encouraged me to have a drink while pregnant. I have made the decision to go alcohol free since ovulation and plan to have a beer after delivery. Not that I would not LOVE a margarita, but it is just not worth the potential guilt if anything goes wrong- whether or not that one drink would have anything to do with it.
I have friends that smoke and drink (get drunk) around their babies and toddlers, they drop the F bomb even after their kids are repeating everything. I plan on phasing these people out of my life. I have higher standards for myself and the people I associate with.
Oh, and you cannot "sneak" a cig when pregnant- just because nobody saw it does not mean that it didn't happen. She sounds immature and like she is trying to put on a good front.
Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. -Philo
Baby N conceived after 1 miscarriage and more than 2 years of TTC. Diagnosis was low sperm count. We found success after 3 months of anastrozole to increase DH's testosterone and one IUI.
Some charts
I'm stupid. You're smart. I was wrong. You were right. You're the best. I'm the worst. You're very good-looking. I'm not attractive. - Happy Gilmore
I'm so glad I've never actually seen a pregnant woman smoking. I couldn't hold back! I'd rip it out of her mouth and punch her in the face.
I don't know how you can handle it! The thought of alcohol makes my heartburn kill!!
To play devil's advocate - my doctor told me one drink of any kind was fine. I haven't actually had a drink yet but if I really wanted one I'd have it (or half of it anyways).
I also don't get what being a devout Christian has to do with having a drink at a bar. DH and I are both fairly religious but we still drink (well I do when I'm not pg).
The day I went in to have my D&E last October there was a pregnant woman outside of the hospital smoking. I shot her the NASTIEST look I've ever given anyone in my life. Looking back I wish I would have said something to her about why I was there.
I'm guessing the idea is that maybe someone who tries to lead such a wholesome life would do something that is maybe not-so-wholesome? That's how I took it.
like many posters have already said, our parents smoked and drank. hell, my mother had a cig in her hospital room after having me! smoking INside a hospital is unheard of these days.
anyway, we all know alcohol is bad for the fetus, even in small amounts it's stupid. a virgin margarita would've sufficed.
oh well, it is her body and her choice. ?
In regards to the devout Christian thing - they just act like they have these really high standards and morals, yet she does sh!t like this. She also said one time that she told her husband that she wouldn't think twice of leaving him and their daughter and going an having a life of her own. Then in the next breath she's talking about being a Christian and Bible study, etc. It's just very conflicting if you ask me.
I was thinking the same thing... if I were the bartender I would have just given her a drop of tequila.
I wonder if your friend is an alcoholic or something. I do miss wine and beer a little, but it's really not that hard to give up alcohol for 9 months.
Well, actually, a mixed drink isn't any worse than having a glass of wine. Yes, the alcohol content in liquor is higher (about 40%) than wine (about 12-16%), but the serving size is only about 1 1/2 ounces compared to about 6 ouces with a glass of wine (or a 12-ounce serving for beer). So there's no real difference in terms of how much alcohol is going into your body, whether you have liquor, beer, or wine. If you do a straight shot, it will get into your system faster than if you're sipping, but that's the only difference.
I honestly don't understand the hysteria around a little bit of alcohol during pregnancy. I studied child development during grad school and we learned that there is no documented evidence of harmful effects (like birth defects) associated with light drinking after the first trimester. Fetal Alcohol Syndrome has only ever been found in children of heavy drinkers - i.e. alcoholics. I myself had a glass of wine or a beer a few times a month after 14 weeks with my son, and he's absolutely perfect.