Does SO help out during the night?

LI444 · October 2009

I'm a stay-at-home-mom and my husband works really crazy hours. When I wake him up to help at night, he does it without complaining, but I feel awful making him get up when I know he won't get a chance for a nap during the day like I (probably) will. He sleeps very deeply, so I have to keep poking him to get him to get up. Plus, I'm breastfeeding, so I'll have to get up anyway. But I need the break at night, especially after a day like today, where our son didn't sleep for most of the day and screamed a good part of it. Does your SO get up with the baby evenly, or do you get up more often?

mrspink77 · October 2009

He helps out when I need a break in the middle of the night. But once I go back to work it will be 50/50. My DH is also a hard sleeper so I have to wake him. He does fine with it. I wouldn't feel bad if I were you!

EmH12 · October 2009

We FF so DH and I take turns with the late night/early morning feedings. He helps out a lot after getting home from work as well.

yellowb · October 2009

I am EPing and DH works crazy hours, too. He takes the 8pm to midnight shift and I do everything else. It works for us, although I am definitely ready for a break by the time he gets home at 8pm!

AutumnBride929 · October 2009

Nope, DH sleeps through the night (but, thankfully, DS has been, too). DS will now usually sleep from about 11:00 or 12:00 to 5:00 or 6:00 so it's not as bad as it used to be... but no, DH never really got up at night. It was extremely difficult at first but I'm used to it now, lol.

Jimsgirl5821 · October 2009

DH doesnt help. He works sometimes 11 pm to 7 am so isnt there to help anyway. Plus he has sleep apnea and sleeps with a mask. So by the time he turns off the machine and unhooks himself, I can already be atking care of DD so to me its not worth it.

Jen&Joe06 · October 2009

Joe does all the feedings at night on the weekends. I am BF'ing so I still get up and pump but I don't have to worry about diaper changes or putting him back down so I get a bit more sleep.

During the week he takes B from when he gets home until he goes to bed at 10PM. That gives me time to cook dinner, check stuff online, shower etc.

lauralee1 · October 2009

DH and I both work, we pretty much split the week in half but help each other out if one of us had a hard day.

jen1177 · October 2009

My DH does not get up and help at night. He did not really with DS either. He will if I need him to. Like when DS was sick and would wake up and be puking everywhere all night

But I dont mind it. I only work 3 hours a day and dont have to get him at 630 each morning like he does. I can at least sleep til 730-8 and have the option of napping when DS naps after lunch as DD is usually sleeping then too. We usually go to bed around 1030 and DD has her last bottle around 10pm and sleeps until 3-4am and then does not usually get up again until around 7am so its pretty minimal most nights.

cabo_kate · October 2009

Nope, he does not. I EBF and DS usually only gets up once now so there's not much he can do. But I still resent him for getting a good night's sleep every night.

When I go back to work I may ask him to give a bottle of EBM some nights.

RandomlyEvil · October 2009

I get up with DD. If I need his help for something or I just cannot take it, I'll wake him up, but 99% of the time I'm the only one who gets up with her. I'm the same way, I feel bad having to bother him because he works during the day and doesn't have the chance to nap unless he does after he gets home. He's usually good about helping when he gets home from work, though...so I don't mind too much. I guess I don't mind too much, because he's supporting me and DD and he still helps out with her, but there are times where I just need to sleep. I have broke down a couple times on the weekends and just had him get up with her in the middle of the night.

kimthgrt · October 2009

We do 90% BF, so DH only really gets up to help rock DD back to sleep when shes is mega fussy. And in the morning when DD finally sleeps for more then an hour and a half, DH lets me sleep in. Otherwise, I still do all the chores and such

jonsdeedee · October 2009

When he comes home from work he takes DD and I finish dinner and do some stuff. He also gives her her last bottle and puts her to bed. I get up with her at night, but I'm not working right now so its not a big deal. She has slept through the night more recently so that is nice. When she gets up its only one time a night.

MrsWanee · October 2009

he only helps if i beg him to and then he acts really peeved. i only ask him to though if it's the middle of the night and i've already fed and changed and rocked DS and he won't go to sleep after an hour (this happened 3 nights ago).

Mrs_mam · October 2009

Before DH went to work he got up for every feeding with me. After he went back to work, I took over the night-shift but if things were REALLY bad I could wake him up and he would help out without complaint. Now I am back to work too, and on the night shift, the day shift and it's starting to wear on me and it's only been 1 day. I think I'm just po'd that I have to get up anyway since I am the one with the food. I just need to get over it and ask for help if I need it! No need to count out even, because it's never going to be even.

Kristie33 · October 2009

Nope, and when I see him sleeping soundly next to me, I have a strong desire to pinch his balls. He works, I don't right now. He does take the weekend shifts though.

MrsV092207 · October 2009

When DD was 2 weeks old, I needed the help at night. She had her days and nights mixed up so she was up a lot and sometimes I just needed MH to hold her and keep her calm just so I could get an extra few minutes of sleep.

She is much better now so I don't bother DH.. I know he is working and I am not, so I let him sleep. DD only wakes up to eat and goes right back down, so there really is nothing for him to do anymore.

BeeLove · October 2009

Right now, since LO is still up sevearl times a night, we have a schedule. I take the 9 p.m. to 4 a.m. "shift" ...he goes to bed at 9 and I sleep when the baby sleeps if I am tired during that time. He gets uninterrupted sleep during those hours. At 4 a.m. he gets up and I get three hours of uninterrupted sleep and takes the 4-7 a.m. shift ...Max usually sleeps for at least two of it but it's broken up. Sometimes, LO stays up and sometimes he takes a "nap". So, it's not "even" but it's nice to know that at 4, I will definitely be getting SOME sleep.

Wed notdead! · October 2009

I SAH and he works from 8 to 6-7. When he gets home, he does most of the baby stuff. I know he works hard, so I try to make sure not to wake him. If I really need him, he gets up quickly to help without a complaint.

On the weekends, he does most of the baby stuff and takes him with him downstairs in the mornings so that I can sleep in to my heart's content.

starlingrose · October 2009

My bf works two jobs, one mon-fri 7-330 and fri/sat 9-230am... I am responsible for baby from midnight to 4pm the next day and including all feedings up until 7 or 8 when I get my 4hrs sleep. My bf sleeps all night from midnight to 6am and does not get up for feedings. When he gets home from work during the week he has a quick shower then will take over for diaper changes and holding LO. It is completely overwhelming and I cant NO sleep other than the 4hrs at night. and on fridays I feel like I might die because I hardly get a nap before he has to go to work.

Want a personalized experience?

Does SO help out during the night?

Re: Does SO help out during the night?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards