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Ouch

KrindorKrindor
in Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

I just found out from facebook, no less, that DH's cousin is pregnant. She is 24 and got married a year after DH and I did. We're close to all of his cousins and aunt and uncle, and this just hit me like a brick. Especially because it's such a shock, and the first family member to get pregnant after us. I feel so awful because I can't even be happy. I'm just sitting here crying wondering why them, and it's not fair, and our babies would have been only a year apart.

Life sucks. 

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Re: Ouch

  • MommaRed83MommaRed83 member

    Life does suck. There were four other friends of mine that were due right around the same time I was (4 out of 5 of us it would have been our first child). I was so excited especially since two of them were my best friend.

    I had thought of all of the play dates and group birthday parties, group camping and BBQing. And now they all have their babies and I am left with the memories of what could have been.

    It is so hard not to be angry. Not to hate the fact that they have their families and I am left with nothing.

    I have put aside those feelings so that I can stay in their lives. It is so hard not to look at those babies and know that my girls would be the same age and would be doing the same things. But I wouldn't give up my role in their lives for anything.

    I know it is hard, and in time you will be happy for them (not saying that that happiness isn't accompanied by bitterness and jealousy). But a part of you will eventually be happy for her. But if you need to distance yourself do it. Be around when you can, but when you don't feel that you don't have the strength to, than don't.

    I am so so sorry that you have to go through this. It is a horrible feeling I know.

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  • Nikkicole007Nikkicole007 member

    That does hurt! We're going to my 19 year old cousin's baby shower this weekend. Another ouch!

    I'm thinking of you during this time and sending healing thoughts your way. I'm sorry you're having to go through this :(

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