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F/U to everything

DianeN9DianeN9
in 3rd Trimester

I am not seeking drama. I truly, am just lost, and needed some advice on whether or not i should call to find out his intentions. If i loved drama, i would've called without even thinking of how it would turn out.

I decided not to call. I figured that wondering is better than hearing his voice. I despise him, and i should be grateful that the courts/social workers/lawyer will deal with him so i won't have to.

Thanks for all of your advice. I promise im not an AW. Just a young girl with no guidance on how to go about handling this type of situation.

If you took my posts/blogs the wrong way, such as thinking that i enjoy this attention, pity, and drama, you're sadly mistaken. I want nothing more than to be left alone with LO. I want nothing more than for him to stay far away from us. I just needed some advice, is all, but apparently, i can't ask for it here without all of the snarky comments.

 

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Re: F/U to everything

  • Tonya_GTonya_G member
    No one was snarky to you. Honest, yes, but not snarky. And posts like this only continue to fuel drama- you've been on these boards long enough to know it.
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  • december2009arrivaldecember2009arrival
    i hope you read my pm :-)
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  • BonzerBonzer

    No one is being snarky dude, I think that you just haven't had anyone be forward with you either.

    You are making yourself the victim here when in reality the only victim is your son that will grow up in this toxic environment.

    Just get to a therapist, realize that you will be able to make do without his 75 dollar a week child support and do what you have to do for your son so that he doesn't grow up to be like his father.

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  • DianeN9DianeN9

    imagedecember2009arrival:
    i hope you read my pm :-)

    i responded :) thank you

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  • hriesen4hriesen4

    Ditto...The more you post, the more attention-seeking you look. 

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  • LesleyKimballLesleyKimball
    I am sorry that people were mean to you. I think people forget that they are talking to a real person with real feelings and not just a post on the computer.  I wish you the best!
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  • cinderellabellacinderellabella member

    Hey Amanda. I know you are going through a lot right now and need a place for support and to vent. That is very important to handle stress and struggle and come out sane on the other side. I would strongly strongly suggest making a blog that is available to only a few select readers that won't kick you when you're down and (even more importantly) print it off and use it against you.

    You never know who is online and who is reading, your ex's girlfriend could be reading this, his sister, friend, ANYONE.  I also "write it out" when I'm trying to deal with something big and try to put it together in my mind, but those I keep completely private (an online blog on diary setting).

    I really feel for you and mean absolutely no harm by writing this, I'm just trying to help you protect yourself since you are already very vulnerable.

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  • Jocelyn0415Jocelyn0415 member
    imagehriesen4:

    Ditto...The more you post, the more attention-seeking you look. 

    This.

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  • skylined21skylined21
    my only hope is that you grow up really quickly and are able to take care of and raise your son without you making him feel like your crutch in life. I understand this may not be your intention but not knowing how to properly deal with the situation you are in emotionally may lead to this in the long run.
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  • DianeN9DianeN9

    imageskylined21:
    my only hope is that you grow up really quickly and are able to take care of and raise your son without you making him feel like your crutch in life. I understand this may not be your intention but not knowing how to properly deal with the situation you are in emotionally may lead to this in the long run.

    Thank you. I've really grown up a lot the past few months, i just had a freak out teenage moment tonight. Normally i have an ''i dont care what anyone thinks, im going to do what needs to be done for my son'' attitude.. some days i just get caught up in emotions and lose myself.

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  • skylined21skylined21
    imageDianeN9:

    imageskylined21:
    my only hope is that you grow up really quickly and are able to take care of and raise your son without you making him feel like your crutch in life. I understand this may not be your intention but not knowing how to properly deal with the situation you are in emotionally may lead to this in the long run.

    Thank you. I've really grown up a lot the past few months, i just had a freak out teenage moment tonight. Normally i have an ''i dont care what anyone thinks, im going to do what needs to be done for my son'' attitude.. some days i just get caught up in emotions and lose myself.

     

    i believe you need to find how to look at him with out malice and with out affection ... no matter what he did to you ... he is not worthy of any emotional output you are capapble of ... save it all for LO ... learn how to deal with the emotions you have toward him and get them all out of the way now ... get over him and your situation .. taking a new outlook on your whole situation may give you just what you need to start over again tomorrow and accomplish anything you need for you and LO, with out your ex.

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  • Alyssajoy87Alyssajoy87 member
    I sent you a FB message. :)
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  • tklmechris98tklmechris98
    I posted something on the other thread. I didn't see this one. I shoulda posted it here... o wellz
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  • mrsandrews07mrsandrews07
    imagehriesen4:

    Ditto...The more you post, the more attention-seeking you look. 

    this...

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  • ellemoney:)ellemoney:) member

    So.. just my $0.02.. or maybe the 2nd set of $0.02.. but my mom is going through a divorce right now (myc button is messed up, so that's why it looks weird. LOL) and it's NOT ever a good idea to try to do things without a lawyer. You really, really need their knowledge and know-how to proceed. ?If I were you, I wouldn't put his name on thecertificate, but that's your decision.?

    Good Luck.?

    ?

    ETA: I put the stuff about my mom.. she thinks she is able to do it without a lawyer.. and it's just not going to happen. At all. ?

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  • sgrlsgrl member
    You're young and you're in a rough situation. I totally agree with the previous posters who've advised you to be careful what you post on the internet and don't call him. Don't put anything out there in the universe that he could use as ammo against you. Good luck; I wish you the best.
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