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Two Under 2
I'm not trying to cause panic, but
all of our area hospitals will upgrade to a strict visitation policy as of Monday Oct. 5 due to the CDC's recommendations on the H1N1 rise of cases. Our hospitals will not allow anyone under the age of 18 to visit the hospitals INCLUDING siblings.
My DD has never gone a day without seeing me and I have trying to plan to keep her routine as normal as possible and now I have to deal with this. I can't image being gone for 2-4 days and then walking in the house with a new baby. I am freaking out. I might sign myself out in 24 hours or have a home birth on accident.
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Re: I'm not trying to cause panic, but
I just asked my OB about this and he said they were talking about it but nothing is official yet. Then he told me he really wouldn't recommend bringing DD to the hospital anyway and exposing her to all the germs just to see me. He said hopefully all will go well and I'll only be there 2ish days anyway.
But, like you, I just can't imagine being gone and then just coming home with a new baby! I feel like DD would feel like we're invading her space or something and would have a harder time adjusting if it were done that way... I don't know! I like the idea of her meeting the baby on neutral grounds and not just, oh mama's home and here's this new being that's going to be around all the time and demanding all her time. I'm anxious about it too.
BFP 5/07 - Kylie born 2/08. BPF 2/09 - Alexandra born 10/09.
TTC since 8/13 - diagnosed difficulty conceiving due to LP defect. Took vitamin B and Vitex Berry to help lengthen.
BFP 2/14 - Missed M/C found at 8.5 weeks. D&C at 9w2d. Partial Molar Pregnancy.
BFP 11/14
My Pregnancy(ies) Blog
I had my boys last winter and had a c-section.
My DH came and visited me a night - I made him go to work since with my DD we lost a week for him to be home because I was in the hospital a full week.
My IL came down and helped out and watched my DD.
She was 20 months old and I debated back and forth on if she should come to the hosptial. To top it off she had a cold and ended up with an ear infection that week I was in the hospital.
It was also the first time I was away from her and we were bringing home twins. So I was really worried.
My DH over ruled me and brought her to the hospital a couple of times. The first time just a couple of hours after I delievered.
She was tired and fussy and a mess. She wanted up on the bed and we tried to tell her to becareful and she ended up almost pulling out my catherter (??).
To be honest it was just stressful for me. I was recovering from a c/section and dealing with twins.
It seemed like when my DH walked through the door with our DD I then became her main caretaker again So it was rough for me when she came to visit of an hour or two.
But that was just my experience. I also know my DD and feel like she would have been fine if mommy brought the boys home to her turf. We had been talking about the babies forever and she understood to a point what was happening. I guess it will all depend on how old your DD and what she understands.
While I understand the anxiety about being away from your oldest (I feel it too!), I've had more than one mom tell me that it is better NOT to bring them to the hospital, or if you do, only to do it on the last day right before you are leaving so that they can help you bring the baby home.
The reasoning varies...it's hard to contain a toddler and keep them calm in the hospital, they are upset about seeing you in the hospital bed surrounded by machinery, etc. But the most compelling reason to me is that several moms have said their LOs had a VERY hard time seeing mom for a couple of hours and then having to go home without her. The toddlers seem to handle you being gone better than they handle seeing you in short segments and then having to leave you again. Like if you leave them with a babysitter and then have to go back for something you forgot - often causes a meltdown even if the initial good-bye was okay.
Our hospital is still allowing sibling visits, for now, but I think we may leave my son with my parents for the duration, maybe bringing him at the end to help us take the baby home. I still have a few months to decide, but that's what I'm leaning toward.
Also, I don't remember how far along you are, but maybe a mini-babymoon would be good, so your daughter has been away from you overnight at least once? My husband and I have left DS with grandparents overnight three times now, and my son seems to handle it well. That is reassuring to me.
that would not be fun- sorry. Do you already know you will be having a c-section though? how come 2 to 4 days? my hospital kicks you out after 24 hours...
No, I'm planning for a 2nd vaginal birth but you never know if you'll have a c-section. Our hospitals keep us for 48 hours for a vaginal birth. If I go into sudden labor, DH and DD will have to wait in the car until someone arrives to pick up DD. I'm not even sure how I will get home at this point.