Those that email "thank you's"

hopefulmom · September 2009

I ran into a past coworker and she was telling me what her DIL did after her babyshower. "Ann" said that her DIL's mom hosted the shower and passed out envelopes for everyone to put their name and address on...OK Well, then she gets a text...yes I said TEXT that said..."Tnk u 4 gift. luv ?" She was flabbergasted. She said she called her friends and asked if they got the same and a couple of them said yes they did and a couple said they got an email (they don't have text...lol). She called to tell her sister what had happened and her sister said she didn't even go to the baby shower because when they went to the wedding a year before they gave them a check for $1,000 and got an EMAIL thank you!!! She said if she can't take the time to "write" a thank you note than she (the aunt) doesn't have the time to go to any other function for the couple. Ann's DIL does not know this why the aunt didn't come to the shower.

So...for any of you that think it is OK to email or text a thank you (or even an invite)...people may not tell you to your face what they think about it...but they WILL tell other people.

ValentineBB · September 2009

Good story. E-mail thank yous are tacky.

EastCoastBride · September 2009

Good for the aunt for not going to another event. Wow. JUST wow.

Tnk u 4 gift. Really? A grown woman thinks this is acceptable? I could maybe, just MAYBE, forgive an email if it was at least written AS a normal Thank You would be written.

But a woman who thinks sending a TEXT in "text speak" is acceptable - I'm sure the email wasn't any better.

It would be nice if someone at least said something to the mother!

hopefulmom · September 2009

Oh...trust me...Ann said she told her DIL that she did not make people happy by sending a text and email thank-you's. Unfortuantely, it is after the fact...but she knows. Ann said her response..."oh well, I didn't have time." Ann, who is a single mom and works full-time, is so upset over this because many of the people who attended the shower were friends of her's (guess DIL didn't have a lot of friends or family...wonder why?) and she thinks it will reflect badly on her (Ann). She said her DIL does not work and has not had the baby yet (it's been a month since the shower).

EastCoastBride · September 2009

It's not going to reflect on her. If it were her DAUGHTER, maybe (as in, didn't she teach her better?), but this is her DIL. People are going to know this is out of Ann's control.

But I'll say this - never would I invite any of my friends to anything having to do w/ DIL again. And if it ever comes up in any way, Ann should be very honest "due to your not having time to send proper thank you notes, these people are not goign to be giving you anything again.".

She really sounds like a spoiled brat. We're all fricking busy!

hopefulmom · September 2009

EastCoast...you are absolutely right and this is what I told Ann. I think her DIL just "did her own thing" because Ann said the mom handed out envelopes for people to put their address on...so obviously SHE expected her daughter to send out paper thank yous. I'm not sure how old the DIL is...I'm guessing around mid-twenties (her DS's age) but hopefully she gets a clue. Ann already told her what her friends thought...and also what her sister said. Ann didn't mention anything about her DS...maybe he doesn't have a clue all this is going on and will wonder why people are not coming to their events. Too bad he doesn't know he married a wife with no common sense!

RoxyLynn · September 2009

So as I'm thinking "Gosh, what could be tackier than asking guests to address their own TY's?" - BAM - I have an answer!

hopefulmom · September 2009

Roxy...I'm thinking she'll use the envelopes to put baby announcements in...hoping to get more gifts! There are all kinds of "tacky". lol

ValentineBB · September 2009

This really needs to be sent to etiquette hell.

lovinfall · September 2009

That is beyond tacky. It is rude and ungrateful.

ValentineBB · September 2009

Ambsies:

ValentineBB:
This really needs to be sent to etiquette hell.

I LOVE Etiquette Hell !!!

I could spend hours on this site. It never ceases to amaze me how clueless people are.

jettagurl · September 2009

hopefulmom:
Oh...trust me...Ann said she told her DIL that she did not make people happy by sending a text and email thank-you's. Unfortuantely, it is after the fact...but she knows. Ann said her response..."oh well, I didn't have time." Ann, who is a single mom and works full-time, is so upset over this because many of the people who attended the shower were friends of her's (guess DIL didn't have a lot of friends or family...wonder why?) and she thinks it will reflect badly on her (Ann). She said her DIL does not work and has not had the baby yet (it's been a month since the shower).

I think Ann needs to have a 'little' talk with her son about sending out formal thank yous. There is still time to make this right. If I were Ann, I'd probably even buy the thank yous for her.

hopefulmom · September 2009

She didn't mention it but I can almost bet she has spoken to her son. Not sure if he'll do it though. He works two full-time jobs so she can stay home and sit on her bum (spending time texting and emailing thank you's). lol As for buying the thank yous...she HAS them (and the envelopes are all addressed)!

Temp6313048411121614 · October 2009

So tacky! If someone spends their time and hard earned money to buy you a gift, then I don't think you have any excuse to not sit your butt in a chair for the 2 minutes it will take to write a TY. WTH is wrong with people?

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