ASD moms...obsessions with things
DS has five therapists and also attends an autism school 2-3 days a week.
Here is my question:
My son is overly obsessed with my car. Anywhere we go, he will have to touch it, or run to it, or plays in it. It is to the point where I can't even take him to ANY park because he just wants to be near my car (or my husband's) and won't play at the park.
Today I was over at my good friend's house (who knows about Gabe's issues) and my DS was of course avoiding her DS (for no reason...we are working on socializing with peers) but he kept trying to stand by the front door (so he could go to the car). It was to the point where he was frustrating and hitting and trying to pinch my friend's DS.
It is also getting to the point where we can't take him anywhere because he throws a huge tantrum because he doesn't want to go inside any building.
The only time he does not do this is when I take him to school (he LOVES it there) although he does run back to the car and touch it and point with it.
Just needing some feedback on how to deal with this!
Thanks!
I should add we try redirecting but it almost impossible to redirect him when it comes to the car...
You will forever be my best friend. I can almost feel our hugs. I will ensure everyone will know (now and in the future) what a genuine, kind, loving person you were...I already miss your laughter and our daily conversations. I love you, Samantha. May 20, 1983- February 20, 2012
Re: ASD moms...obsessions with things
UGH!!!! We are still at a loss of how to redirect DS's worst obsessions and it's been the same stuff for over a year now. It's always a goal... but we're not successful a lot of the time now. At home/with me it's really hard to redirect EVERY time and there's not always something to redirect TO.
He has to have a # on every door. It used to be every HOUSE, but now each door has to have a #. Now, his teacher said she never saw him 'write' (just with his hand) anything on her doors... but he won't stop at our house until he is 'done'.
He writes in the air (hands again) constantly. He's writing numbers mostly. NO PURPOSE. He will tell me what he is writing, but it does not suffice to write on any other surface. We've tried what I think to be everything (though Im sure maybe there's somehting else out there). It won't transfer.
He has to tell me the time in the car, by the minute. UGH THIS ONE DRIVES ME BONKERS. Time is a huge thing for him... he wants to know everything by time. But if I say the SLP will come at 230, and she gets there at 231 or 229, he has a fit.
I hope it gets better.
Glad you can relate (not that you have to deal with this!).
Gabe has been making progress in other areas, but I think his obessions are getting worse!
You will forever be my best friend. I can almost feel our hugs. I will ensure everyone will know (now and in the future) what a genuine, kind, loving person you were...I already miss your laughter and our daily conversations. I love you, Samantha. May 20, 1983- February 20, 2012
One thing that does work.... but makes him cry....
I have been drawing smilies of Happy, Angry, Sad... and we talk about them
then, I relate them to MY own face.
When I see him twirling, writing in the air, or writing on doors... I tell him that it makes mommy 'SAD' and really play up my face. And then he cries. Which stops it, but it makes me feel INCREDIBLY AWFUL!!!!!
But he's starting to get some of my facial expressions now.... he just really gets upset if he makes me sad or angry.
It is a LITTLE better when I tell him HOW to make me happy again and I do my overkill happy face.
I would not advocate making a child cry in this manner. The post above has some great suggestions and ideas on how to deal with these issues.
A few others would be to try and find him a toy car like yours, and not match box, larger than that, when you are going to a store allow him to take the toy with him.
Auntie-
Thanks for your advice...as blunt as it may be! I think I was taken by surprise because we have had MANY playdates and Gabe has always enjoyed himself...but the car / vehicle obsession seems to be overcrowding other areas.
I have been avoiding certain public places because G will get too upset that he is leaving the car.
In our car, he likes to take his stuffed animals and pile them onto the carseat, put them on the floor, pile them on the carseat...which he could do for an hour plus.
I spoke to a couple of G's therapists about this and they suggested taking a stuffed animal in the place I am going to see if that will help. I will try it next time we have to leave the car.
You will forever be my best friend. I can almost feel our hugs. I will ensure everyone will know (now and in the future) what a genuine, kind, loving person you were...I already miss your laughter and our daily conversations. I love you, Samantha. May 20, 1983- February 20, 2012