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Blended Families
A little poll
A regular here, with a new Blended Families only screenname. Just wanted to be a little more cautious with my postings, as my old screenname was quite identifiable.
Anywhoodle, a quick poll.
How old were your SK's when you came into the picture?
How old were they when you got married?
How do you think their ages have played into your relationship with them?
Anywhoodle, a quick poll.
How old were your SK's when you came into the picture?
How old were they when you got married?
How do you think their ages have played into your relationship with them?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: A little poll
Please don't use the word anywhoodle if you have at least a 1'st grade education.
Who are you?
How old were they when you got married? SS was 12 and SD was 20
How do you think their ages have played into your relationship with them?
with ss, I think he was at a very impressionable age. So no matter what I did, he never felt like he could be close to me or nice to me, because his mother filled his poor little head with craziness. It has created a very strained relationship for him and I. Hopefully, one day we will move past that. SD-eh, I don't think she really cared one way or the other. She did tell me that she was super happy to see her Dad happy, and that she was very supportive of that. She and I have been pretty close, up until last March when she fell of the face of the earth for some reason. Still don't know what that was all about. Then she called to tell us she was KU...you all know how that has played out. At 16/17, whatever she was, I think she looked at me more like a friend, and that is okay.
Bite me Karma. I am having a super shitastic day, and if I want to use that I will. It makes me giggle, and I need a giggle right now.
Read my reply or pm me. I don't want to use my old sn over here anymore. Thanks.
How old were your SK's when you came into the picture? just turned 3
How old were they when you got married? 5, almost 6.
How do you think their ages have played into your relationship with them?
In our situation, BM is not in the picture. I'm mom to him, I'm the only 'mom' he's known. If he was older or she was in the picture, we'd probably have a totally different relationship. In his eyes, I am an equal parent to his father for the most part.
How old were your SK's when you came into the picture? SD was 4
How old were they when you got married? 5
How do you think their ages have played into your relationship with them? I think the fact that her parents separated when she was so young made it easier for new people to come into her parent's lives and be a part of her life as well. SD is so sweet and so loving and I think her age made it easier for her to adapt to a blended family lifestyle.
The "w" is what's bugging you, right? It's "anyhoodle" if you want to spell it correctly.
I am skeptical of anyone who comes here says they are a regular with a new SN and then posts a poll and doesn't include any info about themselves, especially after a DD.
I think anyhoodle would bug me too. Is that a regional word?
Oh FFS, Karma, I said a week ago that I was creating a new SN, I am sorry I did not run it by the blended family board patrole. If you read my own answers to the poll, and used even one or two brain cells you could probably figure it out. If you can't, feel free to PM me. I am not trying to hide who I am, just that my previous screen name (to which I have over 10K posts) is obvious, as is the pic in my siggy. If someone IRL saw that, they would instantly know who I am. Have you figured it out yet?
Me too.
I was kidding about anywhoodle vs. anyhoodle.
I haven't been posting much, but I want it clear that it is NOT me! I would never say anywhoodle...or anything even remotely resembling that.
The only person I know who was thinking of making a new profile was doing it because they were being featured on their old one. Is that you?
From this rant I'm 99% certain.
I can't see siggy and pics from work
I posted that before you answered your poll
I didn't go back and read your response until you posted your last reply to me.
I'm not really sure who you are, but I stand by the fact that using the word anywhoodle or anyhoodle is flameworthy.
Whatever Karma. I guess being silly is totally beneath you. I understand, and it really doesn't surprise me at all. Lighten up, it's a message board, not a thesis.
my kids were 3 and 1ish when DH and i got togather and his were 9, 6, and 2. my kids liked him at first but, like most kids take a little time to warm up to people. my son has a strain of autism, so that was/ is something we have to deal with
. somedays they hate us some days they love us
His daughter now 12 and i get along just fine, but like most 12y/os she's got an attitude the size of texas on her
. his 2 boys now 8 and 4 are constantly told that im the bad guy by their mother, and that they DO nNOT have to listen to anything i say, so thats a struggle, but we manage. it would be alot easier if we could get the schedules worked out, it was getting so good between all of us before their BM decided to change everything, i really miss having them all here at the same time, and the kids do to.
How old were they when you got married? He was almost 9
How do you think their ages have played into your relationship with them? Yes his personality was already formed, as was his behavior.
They were 4, 3 and 14 mths when I met them and they were 7, almost 5 and almost 4 when we got married but we had been living together for 2 years by that time. Their ages have definately played a part in our relationship because they were all very young when they met me and I became a part of their lives. The youngest cannot remember a time I was not around.
I can be silly and not sound like Brittney Spears. I'm talented that way.
On a side note, WTH are you? I'm not the only one that doesn't know.
3 of my SK's were all adults. The youngest was 15 and she was 17 when we married.
I think ages have a lot to do with our relationship, but what mattered more was their life experiences and the personal issues we both brought into this blended family.
:rolling eyes at the side conversation that stemmed from this:
None of it is flameworthy or worth the harrassment she's getting. PM her if you must know.
My SS was 4 when I met my DH and 5 when we got married. His Mom did a good job of making it an easy transition for him by letting him know she was okay with it.
Clinically speaking, they say it takes 7 years for a step child to truly accept their new step parent in the best of circumstances.
Now that is interesting. Going by that I have 3 more years until things hopefully find some kind of normallcy. That would be wonderful.
1) One week after his second birthday
2) two and a half
3) He's very accepting, and gives me kisses and tells me he loves me... He's also very clingy with me when we are together.
I think it will be easy in the long run that as far back as he will remember I will have been a part of his life. At least I'm hopeful thats how it will play out!
2.5 and 4
3 and 5
I have actually heard a different tidbit, Karma, but I could be wrong. I've read that a child needs the same number of years knowing you as when they didn't know you to accept you as a full parent. For me, my SS, 2.5 at the time, fully accepted me by his 5th birthday. SD was four and has one more year. This theory is at least true in our relationship. The only difference is that SD, who is very clingy to her father, looks to DH before looking to me. With SS, it just depends on who he sees first.
Because they were so young, they understood me as Daddy's friend until we got engaged. We had an amazing talk with them when that happened to help them understand that I wasn't there to replace their mother. We have an amazing relationship now and fully accept my love and authority.