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Shower same day as friend's wedding- is that ok?

Lola'sDogMomLola'sDogMom
in Baby Showers

My sister wants to throw a shower for me in my hometown (10+ hrs away). The only time that I will be in my hometown again before LO is born is the same weekend as a friend of mine's wedding. My sister was thinking of having the shower Saturday morning and then most of us at the shower will be attending the wedding that night.

My question: am I stealing the bride's thunder by having my shower on her big day? Should I ask her/inform her before the invites go out that my shower is the same day as her wedding. Would you be mad if someone had a shower the same day as your wedding?

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Re: Shower same day as friend's wedding- is that ok?

  • ToesnthesandBride07ToesnthesandBride07 member
    I think this is crossing rocky grounds. Can you have your shower on Friday or the Sunday after the wedding? It may hurt the brides feelings and if she is anything like myself, she will not let you know. Plus, this will make a long day of events for your friends who may then decide not to attend your shower. Good luck!!!
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  • ashleymveeashleymvee member
    No it's not ok.  I would have been pissed if a friend would have done this on my wedding day.  As pp said...what about that Friday evening or Sunday? 
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  • kmtfukmtfu
    cripes, i wouldn't want to attend both a shower and a wedding in one day! call me lazy but give me SOME time to myself eh. ; )
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  • star21gazerstar21gazer
    I agree I wouldn't do it on the day of the wedding...that makes for a busy day for everyone...I'd see if your sister would do it Fri night or Sunday.
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  • RoxyLynnRoxyLynn member
    That's a really long day for a lot of people, and a lot of childcare for anyone who has kids.  And yes, I think it's unfair to the bride.
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  • HapPapFamHapPapFam

    imageashleymvee:
    No it's not ok.  I would have been pissed if a friend would have done this on my wedding day.  As pp said...what about that Friday evening or Sunday? 

     

    This.

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  • EastCoastBrideEastCoastBride member
    Do it Sunday.  even if that means YOU have to take off work Monday.  Don't do it on Saturday, for many reasons already listed.
    "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
    ~Benjamin Franklin

    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
    DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10

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  • mrs_sherodmrs_sherod member
    Def don't do it on the day of your friend's wedding.  You'll cause your mutual friends to choice between attending your shower or going to the wedding.  As pp said, try to have the shower on Sunday. 
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  • mmitche0mmitche0 member
    imageHapPapFam:

    imageashleymvee:
    No it's not ok.  I would have been pissed if a friend would have done this on my wedding day.  As pp said...what about that Friday evening or Sunday? 

     

    This.

    And I would never speak to you again!!!
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  • AngelxxRoseAngelxxRose member
    I wouldn't even have the shower Friday night because of the rehearsal dinner.  Sunday or pick another time!
    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
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  • ToesnthesandBride07ToesnthesandBride07 member
    Angelxxrose.... you bring up a good point!!! 
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  • hopefulmomhopefulmom member

    Obviously you don't expect this "friend" to be at your shower if you have it anytime during that week-end (Friday night - rehearsal dinner, Saturday - wedding and Sunday - Honeymoon).

    Pick another week-end.

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  • KKleeseKKleese
    My cousins wedding shower was the day after my wedding (on a Sunday) and it was a lot for my family.  I mean we were really busy Friday with preparing and the wedding Saturday they were all pooped and had to go sit and watch her take 10 minutes to open each gift.  Needless to say everyone understood it was the best time since people were in from out of town but it was a very long weekend.  I did not go even though we weren't leaving for the honeymoon until later we had a lot of friends in from out of town and choose to spend time with them who we only see once a year maybe instead. I would make it a different weekend.
    Krissy and Craig
    Mr. & Mrs. as of May 23, 2009
    Parents to Baby Jack as of March 4, 2010
    and Bobbi Claire June 7, 2012
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  • PhoenixsMomPhoenixsMom
    Not Cool! I'd be pissed. What all the PP' s said.
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  • jshfjshf member
    Since it's the only time you will be up there, I think it's fine to do it on Sunday.  I don't know if a lot of people from the wedding will also be invited to the shower or not.  But if there are, I probably would make it just very casual and simple so it's not too stressful for everyone.  I'd also just tell your friend in advance that you're not trying to steal her thunder and explain you would not normally do something like this, but it's the only time you can do it.  I wouldn't ask like other people said.  She probably wouldn't tell you no.  But just let her know that you don't want to upset her, but that you also want to celebrate your baby's birth.  
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  • seniah_05seniah_05

    You are absolutely stealing her thunder.   

    Sunday and small or another weekend for sure...I would not be very likely to attend a shower the same day as a wedding.  That's a lot going on - and an expensive weekend. 

    If the friend knew of the shower - yes, I would be annoyed.  And keep in mind that people have known about the wedding for awhile too - people will be gift torn.

    TTC since 2005. DS via IVF - 02/10 Baby #2 - due 10/16/11
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