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need your advice/ opinions RE: work

mrs.viv07mrs.viv07 member
in Pregnant after a Loss
since i haven't been here for a year i don't ualify for maternity leave but i do get short term dissability with 60 percent pay which is great but here is my dilema I.m seriously considering SAHM because i would have to work just to pay for daycare with not much left over. thing is when should i inform work that this is a possibility? right before the 12wk leave is up? not sure how to handle it, but i wnt to be able to get the pid leave....i'm so clueless with all this HR stuff lol
BFP #1 May 2000 ~ Darren was born Jan 13, 2001 ~ 6lbs 2oz 191/2" ~ 39 wks due to low fluid, otherwise perfect pregnancy
July 2004 abnormal pap, colposcopy and LEEP procedure ~ paps every 3 months all normal for 1 year
2006 all clear to start TTC
HSG Nov 2007 ~ all normal except mild left tube blockage
BFP #2 Dec 2007 EDD sept 3 ~ missed m/c ~ Feb 14 2008 ~ 9wk 2d D&C
BFP #3 Apr 2008 EDD Dec 10 ~ ectopic ~ May 2008 ~ 5wk 2d ~ emergency lap surgery, lost left tube
BFP #4 Jul 2008 EDD May 5 ~ missed m/c ~ Aug 2008 ~ 5wk 2d D&C - trisomy 16
RPL panel Aug 2008 ~ diagnosed with compound hetero MTHFR
BFP #5 Nov 2008 EDD Jul 31 ~ blighted Ovum ~ Dec 2008 ~ 4wk 3d ~ natural m/c at home for my birthday
BFP #6 Feb 2009 EDD Oct 15 ~ 4wk 3d ~ chemical pregnancy ~ Mar 2008
BFP #7 May 18 2009 ~ Gabriel Michael ~ Jan 19, 2010 ~ 7lbs 2oz 21"
TTC again since Jan 2011
BFP #8 Jun 2011 EDD Jan 20 ~ 5wk 6d ~ missed m/c ~ D&C
July - Hysterscopy removed some polyps, all clear for IUI with clomid
Aug-Oct - IUI - with Clomid all BFN
Nov-Jan - IUI - with femara and trigger = BFN
back to TTC naturally on our own hoping for another miracle.
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Re: need your advice/ opinions RE: work

  • kimmie321kimmie321

    It may not have been the right thing to do, but I waited until I went out on maternity leave to hand in my resignation. I felt like they would have considered letting me go if I told them my plans. But, every work place is different and if you feel like they would not let you go before hand then I would tell them.

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  • PurpleK26PurpleK26 member
    again, may not be the right thing to do, but I'd take my paid leave, go back for a week and then tell them it's too hard to be away from LO and you need to resign.
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  • GTBrideKCGTBrideKC

    imagePurpleK26:
    again, may not be the right thing to do, but I'd take my paid leave, go back for a week and then tell them it's too hard to be away from LO and you need to resign.

    Agreed!

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  • Mrs.EmmaLouiseMrs.EmmaLouise member
    Is the STD paid by your work or the state?  Sometimes their is a length of time you have to work after your mat. leave.  My old job you had to work for as long as you took off or you owed the money from paid mat leave back.  Example, you took 12 weeks off, you had to work 12 more weeks.  Check with your HR lady, just tell her you are exploring all possibilities.
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  • tiffanylaw06tiffanylaw06
    Check your policies because you might have to pay back your leave if you do not return to work afterwards.  Sometimes you just have to return for one day and then quit but you might need to do that to be safe.
    After 2 m/cs, dx October 2008 with hetero factor v leiden & mthfr & low progesterone; third time was the charm - BFP 3/19/09 on first cycle of clomid. Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • beaner628beaner628
    My boss told me even if I am planning to stay at home after maternity leave to take maternity leave and not resign until I am ready to come back. She wanted me to take full advantage of the benefits.
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  • erinkate23erinkate23

    If your 60% pay is from an insurance plan that either the state or you pay for (Short Term Disability Insurance) this is absolutely fine and no problem.  You can probably share your intention with your employers, since they'd appreciate knowing that you don't plan to return.  In Rhode Island, all working moms get 13 weeks of TDI, since TDI premiums are deducted from paychecks.  As an employer, I could care less if someone takes advantage of that.  I would like to know that they aren't returning so I can hire someone to replace them.

     If, however,  the company is going to pay you 60% of your pay as a benefit, believing that you intend to return, then I would say this is probably unethical. 

    You can always say that you haven't made up your mind yet - which may be totally true.

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  • Bride2b2004Bride2b2004 member
    imageerinkate23:

     If, however,  the company is going to pay you 60% of your pay as a benefit, believing that you intend to return, then I would say this is probably unethical. 

    I don't agree.  Companies do things for employees because it is determined to be best for them.  Employees are entitled to do the same and it isn't "unethical", regardless of how companies structure disability coverage for employees.  Do you think a company says, no, don't make "Viv" take on that weekend assignment because it would be unethical for her to make that investment in the company when we may do layoffs and she could be cut?  No.  They make the best decision for them.  You could work your butt off and still be cut if that is what is "best for the company."  You should make decisions that are best for you.  

    If you know you aren't coming back and you don't mind saying so, then I would tell your boss.  If you want to keep your options open, I would take your leave and then make a decision.  GL!

    Fortunate to be a SAHM to my 3 musketeers (5/2006, 5/2010 & 12/2011). Soy & dairy free for the 3rd and final time. Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers imageimage
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