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TTC After a Loss
megjr8
member
So my SIL called me re: baby names
megjr8
member
Ok let me preface that there are 3 names that we like: Logan, Lydia and Lyla (either as a middle name or first name). Everyone knows these are our names - I use them already as if we have children. We have had them picked out since before we got married and that was is June 2007.
So my SIL sent me a txt the other night with a girl name they can't use because of their last name - Siena Hope. Don't like it. Today she sends me one since she knows we like the "L" names - Logan Rose for a girl. I texted back and told her Logan is a boy name and I've never heard it for a girl.
A little while later she calls and says that she just wants to get it out in the open that although she knows we like Logan, Lydia and Lyla, they do too and if she wants to use them for her next child (which she's not even pregnant with or trying for yet) then they'll use them. She says she's not trying to be b!tchy or make me upset and at the time I wasn't too upset....but the more I think of it the more it's making me upset.
One - we have Logan and Lydia picked out for literally years and she knows that and has known that all along...
Two - She mentioned how I asked her while pg the first time not to use Lyla if it was a girl and that upset her. Yeah - because it's my Nana's name and she & I are really close and she's my role model for so many things. What don't you get??
OK I do understand it was annoying to her during her first pregnancy to hear "well don't use this name because I want to name a kid that" from other family and friends... but come on, why pick on me?! She says she's got a few names that she really likes that only one of our other SILs knows & she doesn't want to tell everyone so no one steals those names.
Am I off base? Really don't just tell me "you're right to be upset" if you don't think I am. My SIL and I are close enough that I can and think I might write her a little something with my feelings. I'm going to talk it over with DH too.
WOW just realized how long this is ... sorry!!
In memory of precious Julia, sweet baby James, and now Timmy who fought so hard.
Natural miscarriage - April 2009 ~ We love you, 'Blueberry'
Lydia, born July 12, 2010
Labor buddy to Kelly0615
Natural miscarriage - April 2009 ~ We love you, 'Blueberry'
Lydia, born July 12, 2010
Labor buddy to Kelly0615
This discussion has been closed.
Re: So my SIL called me re: baby names
If one has to clarify that they're not trying to be b!tchy, then they are. WTF?!
I am a firm believer that no one "owns" names, but I do think it's crummy to have your own sister be so blatant about it.
This sadly proves my theory that sometimes it's best to keep names secret...that way people can't steal them!
that dumb hoe. yes you have every right to be mad. and especially after you have had a loss it hurts more k? me and my bff were preg together noth times actually (she was like 4 or 5 months ahead of me though) and EVERYONE knew we were gonna use Camila. What did she name her 2nd daughter? Camille.
slut. i still hate her down inside for that and always will.
I agree with pp - if you have to say "not to be b!tchy" you should probably re-think what you're about to say. I think it's totally fair for you to have your 3 names that you would like to use.
It's not like you said "don't name your kid something that starts with 'L'" - THAT would be unreasonable.
I second that. I hate it when people say "I'm not trying to be bitchy" and then say it anway.
I think she is a biaaatch... thats very nasty of her, especially if she knows what you are going through ttc etc.
There are ten bizillion other names she could pick from, that she would like just as much. This is just being petty, on her part. I would be mad too.
I have a short list of names, and I have told my friends and family that those are mine. Unless it has significance to their families, back away!
My sister did this with her daughter to me. I asked her specifically to not use Ella. She tells me they then decide they like it because I mentioned it.... Then, tells me if I"m a good aunt that I'll agree to let them have the name.
I say no.
She then names me neice Elizabeth and calls her Ellie.
Like I can actually call a baby Ella when there is a first cousin named Ellie. Pure jerky and rude.
oh, and she also acted all crappy when DH and I revealed that we aren't considering Ella anymore.... like I'm the one with a problem.
People will do what they want... and it is still b!tchy... no matter how you look at it.
THIS!
Again, a situation I'm familiar with. I'm sorry you're having to deal w/this.
My SIL tried taking my dh's favorite girl name--Allison. She said she knew I wasn't fond of it and that she didn't think it'd be a big deal. She proceeds w/I know you'll use Ella (my favorite girl name at the moment) and so it shouldn't be a big deal if we did use Allison. I let it go. Turned out she found out she was having a boy......so then GUESS what she did!? Our boy name is Eli Thomas (after my grandfather and great grandfather)........she said she was seriously considering Elijah William and calling him Eli. She then told me this whole story of how we weren't ku right now and that we may change our mind or never have a boy, yadda, yadda.....
Still ticks you off though! (ps---now she's switched to William Caden....so although I don't like that name, I'm hoping she goes that route so that I still have the possibility of using Eli).