Working Vs. SAHM thoughts

Lovin Wife · September 2009

I am currently working and I do like my job and on top of that my work offered that I can bring DS to work with me for up to a year. It has been nice and difficult, but sooo glad that I can do it. With that said, lately I can't help but want to be a SAHM. DH right now does not make enough for us to live on the way we live right now (rent, cars, health ins., etc...). Did any of you cut a huge amount of your expenses in order to SAH? We have two cars, I would sell one, even move to cut our rent...

Just curious, but this feeling started a while ago and is getting stronger, just wanted to see what any of you did and how did it work?

TIA

LadySmith08 · September 2009

I am in the same boat. I feel so blessed to be able to bring DD to work with me everyday and my boss wants her here till she starts school. I know am lucky. But I find it very stressful to get my job done and have her here.

Pesky · September 2009

I would ask this on the SAHM board -- you'll probably get a lot of good responses. GL with your decision!

MeliFalc · September 2009

Looking forward to responses. We are on this boat. Seeing if its doable and how to do it.

NATALE0624 · September 2009

I am in the same boat as you. We cant make it alone on my DH pay either. I am only working 28 hours a week ( if I am lucky) just so I have the chance to be home with my DS as much as I can. I would love to Stay at home but we just cant afford it.... I felt this way when i came back to work 2 weeks ago. .LOL...

katypresson · September 2009

I would love to SAH...but it's just not possible for us financially either. My FIL watches LO so we don't have to pay for childcare. We also get our healthcare through my work...so it's just not possible for me to SAH. Plus I would get bored after awhile. I get to visit LO at lunch since he's only 5 minutes away...that helps me get through the day.

Lovin Wife · September 2009

I am thinking it would be doable if we sold a car, rented a cheaper place, but DH is sceptical and wants to be making more and be more stable at work.

grinsandgiggles · September 2009

I don't buy anything. Seriously. Nothing. I used to go shopping a lot, and it's hard not to go to the store and buy stuff you would normally buy. We got rid of our home phone line and got a Magic Jack ($20 a year), we eat out less, and try to buy in bulk at Costco. We try not to buy stuff we don't need like junk food. We don't go to the movies, but rent or borrow movies.

To me it is totally 100% worth it...but it's not easy. I find it hard being inside most of the day because the things I like to do normally cost money...or I would have a hard time avoiding spending money.

It doesn't help we're trying to save up for a house too.

MrsKatie07 · September 2009

I am bringing DD to work, but she just started daycare part time last week too. I take her there in the mornings and bring her in the afternoons. I will probably be cutting back to part time toward the end of this year. We have talked about me staying home too, so this month we are trying to live on DH's salary, minus the daycare of course. We are selling our country club membership, selling my horse, and I just started clipping and using coupons for groceries. I plan my meals, which saves a ton of $ for us on groceries. Just cut back whereever you can and try living on onen salary for a while.

June3Bride2Be · September 2009

We are going through the same thing. I have an 18 month old and now a 3 month old and I SAH. I am a teacher (well I just graduated with my teaching degree a year ago, but have not actually started working as a teacher) and with 1st year teacher pay in my area, we wouldn't even break even with childcare. Even so, I wanted to stay at home and now plan to until they both are in school. We made some major cutbacks, but it's worth it to us. We each had a vehicle, but I sold mine and are now making it work with just one. My husband only works a mile from home though so it's easy to make arrangements or trade on and off with it if we need to. And it also means we will have to stay in our smallish apt a little while longer before buying a home, again still seems worth it to us!

MrsKatie07 · September 2009

My other suggestion would be a budget. Do you have one actually written out? I just went online and found an excel budget, and plugged all of our bills in. I also made a spreadsheet with the dates each bill is due, and I update it as I pay bills monthly. It helps to see where your money goes every month, and I think you would be surprised at how much you spend on each thing monthly. I was very surprised at how much I spent on groceries and household items and how much I can save by shopping sales and using coupons. Try thegrocerygame.com for shopping tips and lists!

mrsolsenk12 · September 2009

Like a pp said, I buy almost nothing. With the daycare costs being so high, it was not finanically sound to go that route. So I SAH during the day. I work p/t in the evenings and weekends. This allows me to make a little bit of money and for at least one of us to stay home during the day. I work 2-3 nights a week and Sat. and Sunday so about 20-25 hours a week. By making small changes to our lifestyle, we cut out a lot of money. We only pay for groceries with cash and go to a discount grocery store. We cut our Direct TV down to the bare minimum, we almost never go out to eat and usually to a movie at the most once a month. Thankfully we got so much stuff for DS that we only need to buy formula and diapers on a regular basis. It is doable if you are willing to make some sacrifices.

Jennilynn · September 2009

When it was time for me to go back (R was 4 months) I was crying every night. But then I made the decision to go back part time and I'm really enjoying it. I never thought I'd be the one to say this, but it is really nice to have some adult interaction and talk about things other than kids. I work nights and Sundays so we don't have to pay for child care. We live in a house that has really cheap rent, we only buy things we NEED, we got rid of our home phone line, we don't really go out... so that we can still stash some $ into savings and not be stressed about it. But like others said, you need to make a budget and look at what you can do.

CalinsBride · September 2009

Got a cheaper car that we bought cash to eliminate car payments.

We only drive when we need to, and take the train a lot to save on gas. We are listed as recreational drivers on our car ins so its cheaper.

We buy storebrand groceries instead of brand name, and plan our meals based on what's on sale in the fliers.

We don't have cable anymore, we just have internet and we watch whatever shows we can find online.

Our only vacations for the next several years will be camping and B&Bing it within driving distance (huge sacrifice for us, we love to travel).

We buy Parents Choice brand diapers instead of Huggies or Pampers.

I should add that I'm on maternity leave for a year at 60% of my previous income, and we are putting more than half of that money away in an account to help with me SAH next year. This year we are mainly living on DH's income. He works on a contract basis, and gets grants and scholarships because he is a student.

I want to SAH until LO is in jr. kindergarten, but will go back to work whenever I need to obviously.

greenrunner4 · September 2009

MrsKatie07:
My other suggestion would be a budget. Do you have one actually written out? I just went online and found an excel budget, and plugged all of our bills in. I also made a spreadsheet with the dates each bill is due, and I update it as I pay bills monthly. It helps to see where your money goes every month, and I think you would be surprised at how much you spend on each thing monthly. I was very surprised at how much I spent on groceries and household items and how much I can save by shopping sales and using coupons. Try thegrocerygame.com for shopping tips and lists!

Defintely BUDGET. We do, and we look at it at the end of every month, and we own a home, and have two cars. It is tight, but we make it work. Though I am not a true stay at home mom, I do only work 15 hours a week when I used to work 40. We have a budget, and we stick to it. We cut out things we do not need (like alcohol), and snacky thing. I also shop ALOT less. We have cut back on gifts (like birthday, christmas) but it is fine. I still just breastfeed, and when we start solids I will make them. For food, try buying bulk in things that last. We buy meat on sale, and freeze it, clip coupons, etc. it is a PAIN, but I love being able to spend more time with him instead of taking him to the babysitters all the time (we tried it, and I hated it!).

Midwest_Girl · September 2009

I am a stay at home mom right now and I'm deperate to get back to work. It's just not for me. I love my kids to death, but I really need to also have an outside life. It makes the time in the evenings and weekends much better with my kids. Also, I want to be able to help pay for things. My husband is gone for days every week for work and we live across the country from our family, so maybe if our situation were different, being home would be better for me... I know I'm not the norm because most of my friends are stay at home mom's and they all think I'm nuts to want to go back to work.

tiffany41108 · September 2009

i wanted to SAH, but after about 2 months of maternity leave, i was ready to go back. i'm only working part time (20-25 hrs/wk), and it's so nice to have a break. granted, it's work, but i have a great job and work with awesome people. if i didn't have work, i would do absolutely no socializing.

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