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DH Vent...(little long)

neonstarfishneonstarfish
in 2nd Trimester

So My DH is currently over in Okinawa for school but he is coming home monday because the military is disorganized. -_- But that's not what this vent is about. It's about my DH and money. I know we can live fairly easily on his paycheck alone since we don't have to worry about rent and utilities. But he can't seem to figure out why we are living from paycheck to paycheck and only have 5 bucks in our account(Payday is tuesday). I was trying to explain to him that sometimes unexpected bill come up, like getting my cat from quarantine here in Hawaii(165 dollar pop. Ick and then the 150 dollars he over spent from last paycheck, which put us into the negatives). After this, I told him it's because whenever he goes places, he spends money and buys frivolously.

SO HE HANGS UP ON ME AFTER MAKING ME REPEAT WHAT I SAID.

and it's not like I can call him back because he called on a phone card since he is over seas. URGH Angry I hardly ever spend *HIS* money on myself(I did get a haircut this month with the little bit of extra money, and have been buying baby things since somethings family cannot send us from the 48 states, Oh, and did I mention we were in the negatives last month because of his over spending?) and I rarely put limits on his money, since he is the one working for it, but HOLY CRAP. Maybe it's just the pregnancy hormones but DAMN. Looks like I am going to start limiting his money, putting the money he can't spend into my checking account, which he is not joint to.

Looks like its back to the dry erase board for our finances(Literally, I have this dry erase board where I used to write our current paycheck, bills, and then extra money and what it was spent on.)

AngryAngryAngryAngry FUME. AngryAngryAngryAngry

Sorry... I had to get that out of my system. *deep breath* Sad

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Re: DH Vent...(little long)

  • cma1989cma1989
    Umm vent justified! I would be PISSED. When H hangs up on me anytime I'm mad, but if he was in Japan and I couldn't call him back? OMG. The cost of living in Hawaii is ridiculous too so I totally feel your pain. We're paycheck to paycheck right now. Take deep breaths!
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  • aaronicaaaronica member
    yeah this is actually one of the only justified DH vents i've read today <no offense>
    Report Reply
  • firechick844firechick844
    I totally agree he should of never hung up one you. Just a quick question are you looking for ways to be a STAHM and pick up a little cash? I run my own businesses from my house and am able to stay at home. check out my website at: www.temptationspartiesbyamanda.webs.com then fill out the form if you are interested in more information. We have a lot of great deals going on right now and I get 50% in take home income that night.
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  • Jocelyn&DanJocelyn&Dan

    My husband & I had an issue tonight with money & a tv he wants to buy. Umm, we have a tv for each room, and you do not have $800 to spend on a tv. I almost lost it, and am still pretty pissed off.

    What is the deal sometimes with men spending money frivolously? Seriously? 

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  • ScissorTailedFlycatcherScissorTailedFlycatcher member

    imagefirechick844:
    I totally agree he should of never hung up one you. Just a quick question are you looking for ways to be a STAHM and pick up a little cash? I run my own businesses from my house and am able to stay at home. check out my website at: www.temptationspartiesbyamanda.webs.com then fill out the form if you are interested in more information. We have a lot of great deals going on right now and I get 50% in take home income that night.

    Was that a shameless plug? ::vomits::

    ?

    I think your vent is justified. Finances is among the top reasons why couples fight. I would definitely talk with him when he gets home, but try not to mother him about it (not that I got that from your post, I just know it happens). Explain that you are a little nervous about finances and the baby, and turn it into a situation where he can help think of solutions. Men fixing things. If you can cleverly figure out a way to present the problem where you don't put him at the center of it (of course he is the main one), he will be more open to listening and problem solving. Just my two cents. Good luck!?

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  • neonstarfishneonstarfish

    imagefirechick844:
    I totally agree he should of never hung up one you. Just a quick question are you looking for ways to be a STAHM and pick up a little cash? I run my own businesses from my house and am able to stay at home. check out my website at: www.temptationspartiesbyamanda.webs.com then fill out the form if you are interested in more information. We have a lot of great deals going on right now and I get 50% in take home income that night.

    I have been looking at trying to be a SAHM with a small income for something I could do at home. I've been lurking on the STAM board for ideas. Only thing is, I don't want to put what little money we have into something that *might* work... :(

     

    imageJocelyn&Dan:

    My husband & I had an issue tonight with money & a tv he wants to buy. Umm, we have a tv for each room, and you do not have $800 to spend on a tv. I almost lost it, and am still pretty pissed off.

    What is the deal sometimes with men spending money frivolously? Seriously? 

    Oh, That was one of our previous money issues. -_- If it wasn't for the fact that the military paid us for our hotel when we got here as well as food(we made about 1000 dollars off them every 10 days) That would have been another big argument. It was to begin with, but then I worked out the finances and we did end up getting a nice flat screen. Although I wish we could have spent that money on baby... *sighs*

    imageshortyred919:

    imagefirechick844:
    I totally agree he should of never hung up one you. Just a quick question are you looking for ways to be a STAHM and pick up a little cash? I run my own businesses from my house and am able to stay at home. check out my website at: www.temptationspartiesbyamanda.webs.com then fill out the form if you are interested in more information. We have a lot of great deals going on right now and I get 50% in take home income that night.

    Was that a shameless plug? ::vomits::

     

    I think your vent is justified. Finances is among the top reasons why couples fight. I would definitely talk with him when he gets home, but try not to mother him about it (not that I got that from your post, I just know it happens). Explain that you are a little nervous about finances and the baby, and turn it into a situation where he can help think of solutions. Men fixing things. If you can cleverly figure out a way to present the problem where you don't put him at the center of it (of course he is the main one), he will be more open to listening and problem solving. Just my two cents. Good luck! 

    He is already in fix-it mode.. I think that's why he hung up, because I was blaming rather then solving. *rolls eyes* but whatever. I already have the situation under control for next paycheck and he better not b!tch because.. once he is home.. he can't just hang up on me. WRATH OF THE PREGNANT WOMAN!! Lol.

     

     

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  • passaskatpassaskat

    Playing Devil's advocate (and prolly not maming any friends....)

    so, I am a huge cat lover.  I have 2 kitties back in Maryland that I'd love to bring to Alaska.  But when the baby came into the picture, I realized I had to sacrfice and leave them at my mama's.  Spending money on cats can't be done on our budget.

    So possibly, he sees you spending money on the cat as frivolous spending.  So, when you get on him about spending money, he may been thinking of the kitty dollars.

    Either way, he needs to grow up and not hang up on you.  tsk tsk.  Communication is key.

    Hope it all works out!

    March 21, I find out how far along we are. :)
    Report Reply
  • 1momma1momma member
    imageneonstarfish:

    So My DH is currently over in Okinawa for school but he is coming home monday because the military is disorganized. -_- But that's not what this vent is about. It's about my DH and money. I know we can live fairly easily on his paycheck alone since we don't have to worry about rent and utilities. But he can't seem to figure out why we are living from paycheck to paycheck and only have 5 bucks in our account(Payday is tuesday). I was trying to explain to him that sometimes unexpected bill come up, like getting my cat from quarantine here in Hawaii(165 dollar pop. Ick and then the 150 dollars he over spent from last paycheck, which put us into the negatives). After this, I told him it's because whenever he goes places, he spends money and buys frivolously.

    SO HE HANGS UP ON ME AFTER MAKING ME REPEAT WHAT I SAID.

    and it's not like I can call him back because he called on a phone card since he is over seas. URGH Angry I hardly ever spend *HIS* money on myself(I did get a haircut this month with the little bit of extra money, and have been buying baby things since somethings family cannot send us from the 48 states, Oh, and did I mention we were in the negatives last month because of his over spending?) and I rarely put limits on his money, since he is the one working for it, but HOLY CRAP. Maybe it's just the pregnancy hormones but DAMN. Looks like I am going to start limiting his money, putting the money he can't spend into my checking account, which he is not joint to.

    Looks like its back to the dry erase board for our finances(Literally, I have this dry erase board where I used to write our current paycheck, bills, and then extra money and what it was spent on.)

    AngryAngryAngryAngry FUME. AngryAngryAngryAngry

    Sorry... I had to get that out of my system. *deep breath* Sad

    I KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEEELLLLLL, pm  share info, maybe ill see you around some time. how long you been IO

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  • Jeni182Jeni182 member
    imageshortyred919:

     

    Was that a shameless plug? ::vomits::

     

    THIS.

     

    Also, I'm sorry DH is being a but jerky. Mine has had this problem lately too. I hope when he gets back you guys can sit down and work out the money issues so you're both happy.

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