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As if it wasn't hard enough

mrs_harpermrs_harper
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
That *** had to come back to town today to put his check in the bank, and couldn't so much as stop by to see his daughter before he left again. That's a father figure for you.
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Re: As if it wasn't hard enough

  • vanillacouragevanillacourage member
    If you're serious about your marriage being in trouble and potentially getting a divorce, you need to get a lawyer and make sure your assets are protected.  Getting half of what money is in the bank before he can liquidate the accounts (it's happened!), and getting your name off rent/mortgage/credit cards you share so one of you can't wreck the other's credit (again, it's happened).  Good luck and hang in there.
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  • jenifairiesjenifairies

    I'm sorry. I really hope things start looking up for you soon.

    Do your best for Eris. She needs you.

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  • 1MusicMaker1MusicMaker

    imagevanillacourage:
    If you're serious about your marriage being in trouble and potentially getting a divorce, you need to get a lawyer and make sure your assets are protected.  Getting half of what money is in the bank before he can liquidate the accounts (it's happened!), and getting your name off rent/mortgage/credit cards you share so one of you can't wreck the other's credit (again, it's happened).  Good luck and hang in there.

    Agreed.  I would be on the phone now in case things take a turn for the worse.

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  • mrs_harpermrs_harper

    What's worse to me is that she has been looking for him all day. She is used to waking him up and taking him his glasses, and welcoming him home from college. She even took me outside earlier because she couldn't figure out where he is.

    As for the money and stuff.. I'm not worried about it. We live paycheck to paycheck as it is, so there isn't anything for me to lose.

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  • Temp174496125006552Temp174496125006552 member

    I know you said you don't have any $ to lose, but just CYA.  You never know what shenanigans he might be capable of and you don't want to be left holding the bag.  Just get your ducks in a row.  Better safe than sorry. 

    And I'm sorry he's being such a crummy father.  Hopefully, he will realize before it's too late that no matter what happens between the two of you, she's still his flesh and blood.

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  • jenifairiesjenifairies
    What a d!ckhead. Sorry, I'm not helping, I'm sure, but that would kill me, too.
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  • 1MusicMaker1MusicMaker
    imageseans_grl:

    I know you said you don't have any $ to lose, but just CYA.  You never know what shenanigans he might be capable of and you don't want to be left holding the bag.  Just get your ducks in a row.  Better safe than sorry. 

    And I'm sorry he's being such a crummy father.  Hopefully, he will realize before it's too late that no matter what happens between the two of you, she's still his flesh and blood.

    I would be more worried about him running up debt you may be partially responsible for later:(  I am so sorry you have to go through this.

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  • Mike_HuntMike_Hunt

    wow.  I"m sorry for you.  I am going through a divorce right now and I have found the feelings of insecurity and self-doubt to be very difficult to deal with .

     

    That being said, cover your financial bases.  I would open a credit card in your name only for emergencies, then freeze your credit report.  Anything you are joint on- car title, insurance, etc. make copies of, and leave this information at your relative's house.

    Keep a log of all the times he doesn't come home, or is supposed to take your child and doesn't.  He might try and hold custody of your lo over your head-this happens a lot on blended families.

    Call a lawyer or legal services.

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  • libby73libby73
    imageMike_Hunt:

    wow.  I"m sorry for you.  I am going through a divorce right now and I have found the feelings of insecurity and self-doubt to be very difficult to deal with .

     

    That being said, cover your financial bases.  I would open a credit card in your name only for emergencies, then freeze your credit report.  Anything you are joint on- car title, insurance, etc. make copies of, and leave this information at your relative's house.

    Keep a log of all the times he doesn't come home, or is supposed to take your child and doesn't.  He might try and hold custody of your lo over your head-this happens a lot on blended families.

    Call a lawyer or legal services.

     

    I agree with her on this one.  My friend went through this very thing with her daughter and her husband tried to get joint custody just to get out of paying child support.  My friend did get full custody, she rarely gets child support, and her poor dd never sees her dadSad

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