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work/family related... vent/ramble
So, I work for a small company. I work closely with my supervisor and together, we run the company. The owners are off site and we meet up with them ~ once a quarter or so, but they're pretty hands off.
I realized that when I get ambitious, I start to step on the supervisors toes. I want to help out more and in turn, he gets frustrated and will micro-manage my role and my employees (employees in my sub-section). It drove me batty. I realized there wasn't room for growth, and that along with a few long talks with the hubs, we decided to start a family (well try, then start and now you know where we're at with that).
So, I put the brakes on, for my sanity, for my supervisors sanity, etc. I actually got better performance reviews, etc once I put the brakes on. Weird. I've been working 40 hour weeks, no more.. maybe a little less even for 2 years now.
My supervisors leaving. They're talking about bringing in someone with less experience and making it a partnership, one with me taking on the majority of the management roles and responsibilities. Suddenly, I'm back to losing sleep, taking calls after my normal working hours, all that I so wanted to do to go above and beyond 2 years ago, but when it wasn't appropriate.
I'm getting a promotion of sorts. I'm about to be ultimately responsible for the company. I love the idea of that and it scares the *** out of me at the same time. Will I be able to manage the 40+ hour work week and Jenna? What about when she's sick, had a bad night? Is it fair to her to have a sleep deprived Mama because I've been up all night thinking about the latest issue to resolve?
I'm excited at the prospect, but not sure how to be a Mom and a go-getter at the same time. *Any* tips, advice, comments are more than welcome (please!). I know this is a good thing (um, except we haven't discussed salary increase yet... things are pretty crazy round these parts right now) but I'm not sure how to tackle it without allowing it to effect my family life.
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Re: work/family related... vent/ramble
Can you ask the owners to be directly involved in the interview process so that you can find someone with related experience who is easy to train, you think that your personalities would mesh and you could feel like you could really rely on them if you had a bad night with your kid?
I'm a firm believer in cross training instead of one person holding all the cards. If that person gets hit by a bus (or is out with a sick kid) that shouldn't mean that business can't move forward. It would take the pressure off of you and make the new hire feel like they were not only valued but they wouldn't be as likely to experience that frustration of a career road block that the last supervisor set up for you as well.
I'm going to be heavily involved in the hiring process. Currently, we're going to have someone on staff act as a department leader until we find the right person. But, in looking back at my supervisors history and role, the owners & I have realized that the roles need to be drastically overhauled. And with that, comes more responsibility on my plate. When we get the right person in here, they will have a fair amount of responsibility, however they won't be overseeing me anymore. Instead, we're going to work as partners, each person responsibile for their own department. My department will be the business end of things whereas their department will be to oversee the service end of things (physical therapy).
*hugs*
I know that you'll be able to handle this with finesse and grace. Don't fret it until you know what sort of partner you will have. The positive is that you are a part of the hiring process and hopefully you'll find someone who will meld well with you and your work style.
Although raising kids sure as heck ain't a walk in the park, you're lucky as Jenna's pretty smart and sassy...& luckily, you have a great partner in N so I'm sure you'll be able to find a balance with work and home nicely.
Good luck and you know where to find me!
I think this is a perfect time to really evaluate what you want and what works for your family.
You can't be the go-to main person at work and at home. At least I don't think so. I made the decision a while back that I while I am physically at work, I'm there and working - but my time is my time, period. Now that I work at home one day a week, my boss is confusing those boundaries and let me tell you - I absolutely despise when he contacts me outside my normal work hours - even though I don't answer the phone or email - because it feels like he is infringing on my time with my daughter. Just a phone call pisses me off.
If you're the end all, be all for the office, it will be hard when Jenna is sick. Now, that said, I have managed to be very effective and good at my job working just my alloted time and that's it. If it's set up to work for you, it can work - but you'll need to have someone really cross trained on pretty much everything you do/handle so that you can be absent without notice (i.e, Jenna's sick). Or you have a few people cross trained on different things. When I see people take on everything and not have back ups, it's usually because their ego got in the way and they didn't want anyone else to be as important as them. Or they want to be super important. Don't let that happen to you. Your family is more important than ego. There is ALWAYS someone that can be trained to handle stuff in your absence.
It's up to you to find the balance. You can do it, but you need to approach it like that from the get go. And if there is no salary increase....I'd be hesitant to do anything outside of working hours. But that's just me and my attitude speaking.
Good luck!
Exciting times are on the horizon. I agree that this is the perfect time to be re-evaluating what you want, both personally and professionally. And one of the great things about what you're encountering now is that it sounds like you have the opportunity to lead where your career is going to go. You're in the driver's seat and can set the tone for this upcoming opportunity - including ground rules. While it will be a challenge to take on this new role and additional responsibilities I have faith in you that you can do it, that you'll make it work, and that you'll continue to grow in the journey as both a mom and a professional career woman. It will take a while to find the balance that you're concerned about - and that you and your family and your company need - but you'll get there.
I'm going to discuss the salary increase shortly (obviously). Tiki - when I first started working in the office, I was in charge of policies and procedures... the owner used to say to me "What if Suzie got hit by a bus and couldn't come in for months?" I told him that instead, let's pretend someone in the office wins the lotto.. because when he turned the reference on me, I would rather think of winning the lotto than being hit by a bus and not being able to come into work
I'm obsessive about policies and procedures. Every role has a binder with their jobs documented. I took over this position with no one to train me, no idea what needed to be done, and documented everything. Thank goodness. I was able to navigate maternity leave, and I know that the clinic can run well when I'm out sick (last week was a perfect example).
Thank you so much for the responses. I just need to keep reminding myself what's most important, and that if it doesn't get done by me, it can either be done by someone else or it can wait until tomorrow. In the end, I know this whole thing is a good thing.
ooh, something I'm totally going to sit and chew on. Maybe this solves a couple of things... salary (just keep it the same but work 4 days) and allows me to really be here when I'm here and at home when I'm at home... TY!
Yeah, then you have at least one day of just mommy time with your daughter!
You already got great advice on the work angle so I've got nothing to add there. As far as the mom and home part, if Jenna's in daycare now would/could you consider a nanny or nanny share. A nanny would give you way more flexibility in your hours and if Jenna is sick you don't have to miss work. Also when I took on a major job last time I looked at my increased salary like this, fun part, savings part, retirement part, goals part and sanity part. For my sanity part I hired a housecleaner. For me I was lucky enough that you can just place an ad at Chico State and, then at least, $10 got you your pick of everyone. For $20 a week I had someone come in two days, they got paid for the job so I didn't care how long it took them and one day they deep cleaned, bathroom, kitchen and swept and mopped the hardwoods. The other day they just picked up and swept and mopped. Best money I ever spent!
Whatever it is that makes your home life easier ear mark some of that money for that. I know it's hard not to feel like it should all go for "important" things but what can be more important than your sanity and time with Jenna and DH.