Update to post below: Have I Done Enough

Yellow_Daisy · August 2009

Thanks ladies once again for your support. I have no idea what I would do without all of you. This is the email I sent to friend in regards to doing meals for friend who just had her second baby.

Hi C,

I am not really sure how to say this so here goes. I am really really happy for K and R, but I can?t participate in this right now. Paul and I have been going through a nightmare trying to have children for 5 yrs and I have worked very hard to put on a happy face for everyone and keep up appearances. Emotionally I am drained. I am angry, sad and bitter not at anyone just at the situation. Emmery?s birth was my breaking point. As much as I love all your children I look at them and see the children we should have by now and don?t. It haunts me. I cry when I wake up in the morning, I cry when I am driving to work, I cry all the time. I try so hard for everyone because I don?t want anyone to be uncomfortable around us, but I have tried so hard for so long and I am completely used up. I just need some time to get myself together, to have the strength to love all of your children without being angry that I don?t have any. It sucks and it is unfair but if I have learned anything in the last 5 yrs it is that life isn?t fair and just because you want something with every fiber of your being doesn?t mean you will get it.

I do hope you understand and that K understands. If she asks why we aren?t taking part you are more than welcome to share this email with her.

Love, C

Temp590840000005378 · August 2009

Kuddos to you for having the strength to write and share the letter, it sounds very honest and does not come across in a bad way at all. It is tough keeping up with appearances and having a smile on your face when inside your heart is breaking. Hang in there!!! ((HUGS))

krissyheartserik · August 2009

i haven't read your previous post...but i could have written that email. i am so sorry your friends and lfie is putting you through this. i (as i am sure alot of us on here) feel the same way...watching friends and family have one, two three kids while we're struggling just to have our first still just leaves an ache in my heart. i hope you feel better soon and that they are understanding to your needs. **hugs**

ladychicago · August 2009

(((HUGS))) its a well written, honest, and raw e-mail. i hope she responds well to it. i'm sorry you're dealing with this!

*jenjen* · August 2009

That is a very well-written honest letter...I hope your friends understand and take it how it was intended. Now that it's out there, maybe they can even be a good source of support. ::hugs::

gringa78 · August 2009

I had to write an email like this last week. IF sucks. ((HUGS))

lnle · August 2009

((Hugs)) very brave of you, and I hope you get a supportive response.

Dragonfly1226 · August 2009

Wow. I don't think I would have been able to put the feelings into words like that. I think you did an amazing job. (((((hugs))))) to you.

wishbone09 · August 2009

I give you so much credit for being honest and telling your friend how you feel. The email is very well written and the emotion is there. I am curious to know how she responds.

JosephineM · August 2009

Amazing letter! I think your words were really honest and genuine, and I hope you get a supportive response. Sending you lots of hugs!

Aliki · August 2009

It's an honest, well-written, raw, and perfectly understandable email. I think it makes it clear that you are happy for her happiness, but it's painful to you to witness.

Good luck.

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