- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Infertility
Miracle conception cases
Yesterday when I was at petsmart the cashier and a customer were talking about kids. The cashier said she and her husband tried for 12 years and then when she was 35 (she is now 55) she got pregnant. The customer said her and her husband tried for years and years and aqt 39 she got pregnant (she was also in her late 50's). I am assuming neither did any fertiliity treatment as they both acted like it was a surprise/blessing they got pg. Are these cases rare or does it really happen more than we know? I always here about theses cases but wonder if they are 1 in a million or more common. It gives me some hope as I am currently in my 2ww and if this cycle does not work, my DH and I have come to the end of the road w/IF treatments. Any thoughts?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Miracle conception cases
It does seem that there are tons of people out there with stories. My DH works with 2 women who never could have afforded any treatment and they both eventually got pregnant. 1 ended up having three kids in her late 30's/early 40s. In DH's family, 1 aunt went for 8 years before having her first and then had her second 9 years later. They never did any treatment. Another aunt got pregnant accidentally in her early 20's, then had 8 miscarriages before finally have her second 7 years later. A cousin sought treatment, nothing worked and went on to start pursuing adoption from overseas. She then ended up pregnant with no treatment and had 5 boys right in a row! Another lady in our very small church tried treatments early on in her marriage, 16 years later, she became someone who "didn't know she was pregnant" and the baby was born stillborn at 7 months. Devastating for someone who had always wanted children. Months later, she became pregnant again and they now have a son.
Recently, I have a friend who had decided not to pursue any treatment and has been trying for 4 years....she is now due in December with a baby girl.
These are just in our group of family and friends that are close, ex: all of these people were at our wedding, etc and we had 265 guests. So, it obviously happens, if you figure that many couples in our small circle have had it happen! That goes back to a question I've asked numerous times....if you have sperm and you have a uterus, ovaries and fallopian tubes, will your baby be made in God's timing even if you seek no treatment??? Obviously if you have blocked tubes or no sperm, there isn't a way without help!
Sorry, this got long, but this is something I ask myself every day! Am I willing to test my own theory....I'm not sure yet!
What I've heard (and what is supported by the link below) is that the % of infertile couples who conceive on their own (whether on a break cycle, after adopting or after giving up) is something like 5% (or 1 out of 20). Not great odds, but not one in a million either. Of importance is that most studies I think have found the rate of spontaneous conception in infertile couples doesn't vary following adoption or giving up or "relaxing", so don't believe or perpetuate what you hear about how "common" it is to conceive when you stop trying or adopt.
See this link for more info: https://www.resolve.org/site/PageServer?pagename=lrn_ffaf_moi
It does happen. My BFF and her DH were trying for a few years; she was just about to give up when she got a BFP at 38. What's remarkable is that this happened only 4 DAYS past ovulation.
I have another friend who had an unexpected BFP at 44. I don't know the details with that one, but at 44, I'm sure her doc would have given her dismal odds if she was actually trying.
I know a girl who tried for 19 months was just going to see an RE and got PG. Another girl with DOR had IVF with #1 and then poof, conceived #2 naturally and they're like 13 months apart (though I think that might have to do with the PG.) One older couple (their daughter is my age) tried for 7 years before getting PG with their daughter.
I also know my parents tried for 10 years after me before deciding my Mom was getting too old and preventing. Her sister never used b/c in her life and adopted 3 kids and never got PG.
So I think the people in the first category are really really lucky, but I don't count on it for myself.
This is actually better than I thought. We had taken 2+ years off from the RE hoping for our miracle baby. It didn't happen and we just finished 3 medicated IUIs. Our DX is unexplained so there is a small part of me that our "miracle" will happen one day- but of course I am not banking on it!
It's simple statistics - if the parts are there your odds of conception might be very low, but not zero. Having a 1% chance of conceiving naturally means that 1/100 cycles conception might occur. That translates to 8 years or so of trying. It's not miracles or lack of stress - it's odds. As a friend of mine once said, "even a blind squirrel finds a nut sometimes."
Don't get me wrong - I hold out for a natural conception. But I also know the odds are not in my favor, and it's not something I'm banking on!!
I am a runner, knitter, scientist, DE-IVF veteran, and stage III colon cancer survivor.
We tried for 2 years with no success, only got early m/c. We saw an RE for 1 1/2 years with no success either. After doing a 2nd IUI, with no luck, we gave up and went down the adoption route. 2 months later we wound up pregnant on our own, and things are still going great.
It can happen.
PCOS, RPL, & Anti Cardiolipin Antibody
Urban legend - per my previous post, the rate of spontaneous conception is the same in couples who adopt as other infertile couples. And I'd be wary of any doctor who put much stock in this myth.
I have a friend who moved here recently. SHe had tried for years and even had a loss - they took a few month break and were just about to meet with a doctor about freezing embryos and she found out she was pg....
I think it can happen - sometimes I thing what if I just took a break and tried without all the doctors/meds etc. but I also don't want to hold out for the surprise....maybe if I knew what was wrong but after the past few months I am starting to wonder if PCOS is just the tip of the iceberg....
Per my RE (and this is just my RE), after 3 years of trying a couple has a 1% chance of conceiving on their own. As epphd noted, that's not a zero chance, so there's always a chance.
A study done on conception rates after adoption found that 8% of women who adopted later became pregnant. But you have to remember that not all women who adopt are infertile, and some of them may pursue adoption and fertility treatments concurrently. And 8% isn't a huge number.
I am a miracle baby in this sense. My parents tried for 6.5 years before she got PG with me (with no medical intervention). My mom had a diagnosed fertility problem back then and then when I was about 10 drs diagnosed another health condition that makes PG unlikely, somethning that she'd had (unknown) for her whole life.
Aside: My mom doesn't know about our TTC, let alone TTTC, but the other day she mentioned she was shocked that a couple did IVF after "only three years of trying".
I hardly think 3 years is an "only"!