Success after IF

i wasn't going to C&P but i can't stand it any more

(link deleted since the post was DDd) - the gist was that someone asked for opinions on IVF and a poster named pixy-stix said she believed that if you couldn't conceive on your own you weren't meant to be pg (but that you could adopt...) per her god.  that was just silliness but i engaged her which i should not have and out came "ivf babies are not created by god" and i lost it.

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Re: i wasn't going to C&P but i can't stand it any more

  • no you didn't! ?

    just kidding :) ?

    this i someone that just doesn't get it, and never will.?

    ?

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  • Ugh. Gretchen, I came over here specifically to see if you'd posted anything about that comment.So ridiculous.

     

    Now I'm trying to be pull a polite response out, since I don't want to engage in a flamewar on a board I only lurk on. I'm not sure if I can. So much for not judging.

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  • DH's best friend told me (as I was holding my 6 month old product of clomid) that he thinks that if you can't get pregnant on your own, you shouldn't be pregnant. i told him that while that may be true, i would go through infertility, a high-risk pregnancy, and a premature birth any day of the week to get where i am now.

     

  • she is annoying.
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  • imageMrs.Babbsy:
    she is annoying.

    and ignorant!!

    Our miracle IVF baby - D 6/09 & J - Surprise! born 9/10!!!
  • Oh Gretchen...I love you.  That was a fantastic-read-outloud-to-my-husband response.  Love it.

    These posts always irked me, but I never took it too seriously.  Somehow "growing your baby in a dish" is so much more offensive now that my dish baby is sleeping in the next room.  (And his actual dish is sitting just a few feet away.)  I don't know if I believe in God at all, but even I find the concept of IVF babies being created by science, not god, to be remarkably offensive.

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  • I need to calm down - this has my blood boiling.
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  • my goodness.  i had a feeling this was going to start after the earlier posts today re: donation.

    urgh.  i'm sorry about the distasteful things that were said.  i love your babies!

  • I am not offended by "dish baby" (hell, it's the title/URL of my blog) I am offended by:

    I firmly believe that if you can't conceive on your own, you shouldn't.  There is a very good reason you cannot, be it biological or God driven.

    Ugh.


    After 2 rounds of IVF & 2 rounds of FET, we were blessed with identical twin girls!
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  • thanks ladies :) 

    i have to go upstairs and tend to my now very wide awake "dish baby" ;)  goodnight all - xoxo

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    Our successful cycle was IVF #2: Microdose Lupron Flare Protocol - 2 beautiful blasts transferred.

    email me: gretchela@hotmail.com
  • imagekimarino13:

    I am not offended by "dish baby" (hell, it's the title/URL of my blog) I am offended by:

    I firmly believe that if you can't conceive on your own, youshouldn't.? There is a very good reason you cannot, be it biological orGod driven.

    Ugh.

    ?

    Yeah, the god giveth and god taketh away pissed me off too. ?As if god has a checklist and he said, "hm,,, babies for crazeyJ - nope. NEXT!"

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  • the EFF board is usually so nice. ?now i have a headache.

    ?

    I firmly believe that if you can't conceive on your own, you shouldn't.? There is a very good reason you cannot, be it biological or God driven.

    this is what has me up in arms!?

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  • The cancer treatment analogy was a good one.  It has nothing to do with a life already created or whatever.  It has to do with using "science" and medical intervention to fix an issue.  If I had cancer, I would get chemo/radiation.  Since I have IF, I did IVF.  And boy am I glad I did.

    But I suppose everyone is entitled to their own opinion.  I can't really be bothered to get into a heated debate that won't go anywhere.


    After 2 rounds of IVF & 2 rounds of FET, we were blessed with identical twin girls!
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  • funny, I had a scathing remark all typed out, full of words that the nest would *** out... I even stated that I was willing to get banned over it (which for a mod is a big deal! lol!)

    and then my laptop shut down. So I decided that was god telling me to tone it down! : ) So I did. 

    I replied, but I tried to be respectful. 

    Btw, it was my dish baby who unplugged my laptop... seems to me he was colluding with God! 

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  • I think that thread confirms that my husband and I are getting onsies that say "Science...it works bitches!" on them. lol  Oy vey, my head hurts from reading some of those responses.
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  • Oy vey.  If I weren't so tired right now I'd jump into that.
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  • I'm late to this, but that post upsets me too.  I love how the person claims to know God's will.  If only we could, life would be so much easier :)  Haha!

     My husband and I are Christians and are very strong in our faith.  We (obviously) did fertility treatments, but we didn't get to IVF.  We had decided that if we did get there, we would do IVF, but we would not create more embryos than we would be willing to use. 

     In our opinion, God gave us the knowledge and materials to create the technology and the meds, just like he gave us the knowledge and material to create the technology and meds to treat other health issues.  In addition, and this was probably the deciding factor for us, God is bigger than IVF.  God could choose to make IVF not work for us.  Saying that doing IVF and using science to get pregnant means I'm circumventing God's will, is really minimizing God's almighty power, IMO. 

  • well crap, when i click the link it tells me "forum not found!"
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  • i don't understand how you can say God has nothing to do with conceiving with IVF.  i know people who have done quite a few failed IVF cycles, and then 1 happens to work. 

    you're telling me God had nothing to do with helping those particular embryos implant and stick around?  that's ridiculous.  if God didn't want infertiles to be PG, no IVFs would ever work.

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  • imageGretchen*loves*Michael:

    (link deleted since the post was DDd) - the gist was that someone asked for opinions on IVF and a poster named pixy-stix said she believed that if you couldn't conceive on your own you weren't meant to be pg (but that you could adopt...) per her god.  that was just silliness but i engaged her which i should not have and out came "ivf babies are not created by god" and i lost it.

    As I always say, live 1 MINUTE in our shoes and THEN see what you think about ART.  It can change one's entire perspective when you find out you can't have a baby the old-fashioned way.  As I said in my original blog post explaining our struggle, it just makes the desire to have a baby that much STRONGER when you find out that you CAN'T.  grrrrrr.

    Childhood cancer (DH) + chemo + radiation = 0 sperm.
    LO #1 - 1 unmedicated/self-monitored IUI w/ donor sperm.
    LO #2 - 1 m/c, 2 BFNs, 4th IUI worked (unmedicated/self-monitored with new donor sperm).
    Life is beautiful!

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  • I never saw the post but I have gotten the idea from these replies. People can be ignorant and uneducated. I am a christian woman, heck I have been a lutheran school teacher, and I don't see how my inability to get pregnant without IVF makes me a horrible christian. I have never thought of IVF in a religious way and my "dish baby" is just as natural and loved as a non-IVF baby. My DS is even baptised so I guess God loves him just as much even though he was an IVF baby.
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  • FWIW, I don't think Pixy is a bad person - I see her around various bump/nest boards and she's pretty level headed.  I think she was trying to explain her viewpoints and she didn't perhaps explain well enough that her feelings apply to HER and HER alone.  Whenever you draw god into the conversation people go bananas - which is why I promptly dropped out.  (and why again, being an atheist is so handy!)  Her personal belief system doesn't give room for IVF.  Others' do.  And that's fine.

    I think her posts could have been made with more tact, but I wasn't personally offended.  To be honest, things like this make me realize how much happier I am being personally responsible for the moral decisions I make, rather than relying on what seems like an arbitrary set of guidelines handed down from on high.  This is not to say I have a problem with other people practicing the religion of their choosing, just that this is what seems to be informing Pixie's thoughts on IVF etc.

    Gretchen, I'm sorry she got you so hot and bothered - at least it is clear you have lots of allies!

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    I am a runner, knitter, scientist, DE-IVF veteran, and stage III colon cancer survivor.
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