NSAIFR: Freaking out - need opinions

BestThingsCome · August 2009

Since you ladies are the most level-headed people I know and I don't dare discuss this with frineds IRL. I have to ask here....

My husband was looking on our computer at "detecting ovulation" on the babycenter.com. He searched three different dates of the first day of a period (he searched August 1,2,3). Um..... I'm 25 weeks pregnant and was OOT twice this month with our son. He was alone to live like a bachelor...

He was caught in April having an affair with a coworker. We're in marriage counseling.

Um.... this is pointing down a bad path. Does anyone else view thins as EXTREMELY suspiscious?

talentedgirl · August 2009

Oh dear, I am so sorry this is happening to you. I would view it as extremely suspiscious.

SkypekWithoutAC · August 2009

Yeah, that seems weird to me. Since you guys are already in marriage counseling, can you call your therapist or discuss it at your next session? Since you guys are committing to working on your relationship, I'd try to give the benefit of the doubt (not sure if I'd be CAPABLE of doing that, esp after he's been caught before, but I'd try), but I'd want a damn good explanation, as well. I'm sorry, hun, this has to be terrible for you

AuburnBride06 · August 2009

Hi there. I hope you don't mind me responding since I'm not a permanent resident over here. But since I unfortunately can relate to what you are going through, I thought I would respond. Yes, this is extremely suspicious and it would be driving me absolutely insane. IMHO, I think you need to ask him WTH he was researching this for and point blank ask him if he is seeing her )or someone else) again. IMO opinion, and I've told dh this, he has no right to privacy anymore. I hate to say it, but I don't think there is a good explanation for why the hell he was researching those dates. It could be nothing, but I doubt it. Geez honey, I hope it's nothing. -'ll be thinking about you. I can't stand to leave my husband alone. It drives me crazy. How sad is that? ((((Hugs))))

Nicole. · August 2009

talentedgirl:
Oh dear, I am so sorry this is happening to you. I would view it as extremely suspiscious.

Ditto, this. I'm so sorry you have to go through this.

kimarino13 · August 2009

Nicole.:
talentedgirl:
Oh dear, I am so sorry this is happening to you. I would view it as extremely suspiscious.
Ditto, this. I'm so sorry you have to go through this.

I agree. I hope he is able to be honest, and I hope it ends up being nothing.

EmptyOven25 · August 2009

I would definitely ask him point-blank. I'm so sorry you're dealing with all of this. I cannot even imagine how it feels to be in your shoes.

choco_lab · August 2009

Can you bring it up with him? That doesn't sound right. I'm not sure how to bring it up but he needs to give you an explanation. How could you tell what he was looking at? If he left it out in the open for you to see, maybe it's not as bad as it sounds?

happytracy · August 2009

very suspicious to me. I'm sorry.

ABC-123 · August 2009

Oh no... I am so sorry... It does sound very suspicious to me.

Mr.&MrsS · August 2009

Hey hun, I am sorry you are still going through all this. But that does seem very suspicious to me. Can you bring this up at the next counciling appointment? After what has happened in the past he has no right to privacy, and if he wants to work things out he should respect that you are having trust issues and are checking up on him. And he should have nothing to hide. I really hope it is nothing, but I would address it with him.

dana316 · August 2009

That is more than suspicious...why on earth would he want to research that when his wife is already pregnant?

I would call him on that ASAP...

Whatever happens...keep your head up...I'm so sorry you are going through this...that stinks...

BestThingsCome · August 2009

choco_lab:
How could you tell what he was looking at? If he left it out in the open for you to see, maybe it's not as bad as it sounds?

I have recently installed tracking software and I have keystrokes and screen snap shots.

After he searched this, he deleted the browsing history.

I confronted him. He says he was "goofing around" on the website "that I always tell him to check out." He said he randomly picked the dates just to see how due dates are calculated. Hmmm..... don't think I buy it.

BestThingsCome · August 2009

Mr.&MrsS:
After what has happened in the past he has no right to privacy, and if he wants to work things out he should respect that you are having trust issues and are checking up on him. And he should have nothing to hide.

I totally agree. Of course, he doesn't.

Thanks for the continued support.

And BTW: CONGRATULATIONS and welcome Nolan!!!!! How adorable!

DavezWife · August 2009

I'm sorry, but yes, IMO, if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it's cheating rotten lousy good for nothing cheater.

I also think that if you "recently" installed big dog tracking software, you're a long ways from repairing trust in your marriage (something I'm not sure I could EVER do, so I give you props for trying/i.e. counseling!) and the fact you can't trust him on a computer is A HUGE RED FLAG you should be paying attention to. You're both sneaking around, and it's trouble.

I'm sorry.

yankee42 · August 2009

hey lady..i think i know who this is, and i have been thinking of you and wondering how you were..im so sorry you are still dealing with this.

this does not sound good at all to me...i know you confronted him, and i think you need to see the counselor asap..and bring it up there, maybe somehow he would be more honest there. i don't know sweetheart..i am just so sorry you have to even think about this

Want a personalized experience?

NSAIFR: Freaking out - need opinions

Re: NSAIFR: Freaking out - need opinions

Choose Another Board

Search Boards