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Baby Names
Alright, I need to know if I am being a meanie...
in Baby Names
DH has a name that he loves and is stuck on. I don't particularly care for it and vetoed it the first time he mentioned it. Or at least I attempted to veto it - he won't stop bringing it up and pushing the issue. This has been going on for months now and he will not suggest any other names. He is, however, more than happy to veto any name I suggest simply because I really don't have a name that I love - just a few that are okay or good-enough. And trust me - I've gone through book after book and made at least 5 or 6 lists. There is no name that jumps out at me as The Name.
I think he is being immature for not being more committed to finding a name that we both like and can agree on (not to mention a bully for continuing to push the name I tried to veto), he thinks I'm being immature for not letting him use a name that he loves if I don't have a name that I feel strongly about. I see where he is coming from, but that doesn't change the fact that I simply dislike the name that he wants. We are running out of time (only 3wks till my c/s) and this is starting to become a major issue and something we fight about. Alot.
So, honest opinions (because I'm a big girl and I can take it): Am I out of line? Is it wrong of me to refuse to use a name he loves if I don't have an alternative name that is equally important to me?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Alright, I need to know if I am being a meanie...
Not wrong at all. You say that he thinks you don't have a name you feel strongly about. I would argue that not liking a name is a strong feeling. So there is a name you feel strongly about and it's the one he likes.
Unless his reasons for this name are something really emotional, like it's his favorite grandfather's name or a deceased family member or something like that, he really needs to move on.
Baby #3 is on the way! EDD 3/8/15
DD1--8/29/10
DD2--11/6/12
I don't think it's wrong. Naming a child is a two person operation - you both have to be fine with the name, and if you hate it, it's unfair to the child to name him that. To this day I hear from my mom that she never liked my name - how on earth does that help me and why didn't she speak up? Don't let that happen.
My DH is great at veto-ing too, but has yet to suggest a name. I'm really the one driving the process, and that's frustrating too because I want him to be enthusiastic. So, on the one hand you need to offer some names you are excited about, but on the other he needs to respect that his enthusiasm alone isn't enough.
I am a runner, knitter, scientist, DE-IVF veteran, and stage III colon cancer survivor.
You're not wrong. You should BOTH love your child's name. He needs to be open minded. You can't name your kid something you dislike.
I don't think you are being a meanie. If you don't like the name, you don't like it, enough said. We went through the same thing. FI loves the name Ava and I don't, and he is well aware of this. I love the name Declan but he hates it and has told me absolutely not, so I let it go.
I hope that you guys can come up with something soon!
What's the name?
Maybe we can help come up with alternatives you BOTH will love. Sometimes a third party opinion could help either you fall in love with it, or him fall out of love with it
The name is Atlas. I know it is weird and pretty far out-there, but that part really doesn't bother me - I just don't like the sound or flow of the name.
No, he doesn't, which is the only reason why I'm waivering. I know this name is really important to him because of how persistant he is being. It's still awfully obnoxious, however.
Lol, I thought of this too! It drives me nuts, actually, because Atlas isn't even supposed to be carrying the world, he's supposed to be carrying the heavens. (Okay, that is admittedly nerdy and stupid, but I majored in English Lit...)
I love it, I think Atlas is a super cool name!
If your not sold however, I agree you shouldn't settle
These names have a bit of a similar feel imo, maybe you'll both like one of these:
Easton, Weston, Leander, Lazarus, Hermes, Archer, Achilles, Anatole, Asher, Robinson, Apollo, Cicero, Adonis, Knox, Alistaire, Orion
try Nymbler.com, if you type in Atlas it will give you some inspirational names with a similar feel
GL!
Well, I don't think it's necessarily realistic to expect both parents to LOVE the same name. Many people simply have very different styles when it comes to names, and I think many couples have to come to an agreement/ compromise.
Also, my story- we ended up picking a name that I wasn't 100% thrilled about at first, but my DH REALLY liked. It was the only name that really stood out to him. But I didn't hate it. I sat on it for awhile, and it time, I decided I liked the name and we went with it.
But the key there- I didn't dislike it. He did have a couple other names, a couple that I truly was like "No" immediately. If you truly DO NOT LIKE the name, then your DH needs to respect that. You don't have to both love the name, but yo uboth need to at least LIKE it and be able to tolerate it.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10