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Parenting
I'm done
No hate, just really sad. I am totally crying, but I'm done with this board. Anyone who cares can PM me & I'll give you my personal email, but I'll be deleting my profile tonight when I get home (as soon as I can figure out how).
Thanks for the 7yr ride. I LOVED most of it, and care a ton about some of these Nesties. But I'm done.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: I'm done
now you just stop that.
you do not have to go. we all parent differently, and we all bicker like children- its what makes this place go around. don't leave because you were the target of the day!
buck up and attack someone else!
I'll hold Dander down- get her!
I would really miss you. I think your candid posts and kind reponses are an importat part of this board, and I love how different we are.
( you like the puppies and rainbows, I like dramarama..)
what's wrong?
Seriously? Ok.
And really - think about growing up. You need to. No one was harsh with you - just honest. I hope for your daughter's sake you consider some of the honest responses you got, but it's pretty clear you can't take any sort of advice at all without thinking everyone is being high and mighty or hating on you. Even when they aren't doing that at all.
Word.
Ummmmm riiight. Syop feeling sorry for yourself and make some needed changes in your life.
Ok, now I see why.
Honestly, you know you are my girl but I didn't respond (and never went back to see all those responces until now) because I didn't agree with your actions either.
You can come here and vent but you really can't expect for people to always agree with you. You are not always going to be right.
I'm sorry you and DD had a sh*tty morning but I think not giving her a hug was pretty crappy too.
Don't run because of that though. Take it, use it, or don't. I really don't think anyone was trying to be mean, just giving their opinion as an outsider looking in.
Well said, M. Really, although I judged (b/c I wouldn't have handled it that way), I'd really like to see things become easier for she/Abby and wasn't trying to be flippant about it.
Parenting is the hardest thing I've ever done. P drives me crazy at times. However, I just couldn't imagine being upset with her (and vice versa) as much as newly posts about their relationship. Mom and daughter relationshsips should be like *this*.
There's got to be a better way, kwim?
???
I don't see where you've been a target? I'm confused.
You take my ovaries, I take your yarns.
What did I miss?
If you want to delete your profile email the nest gods, no need to wait until you get home. See posting what you did above was dramatic, because if you really wanted to delete it you would.
I agree with xbg. I won't even say that I WOULDN'T with hold a hug when dd was asking, but that I personally COULDN'T do that to her. She is so little. SHe doesn't process things the way that you do. She can't possibly understand why you did that. I don't say that to make you feel worse, but sometimes we need to stop and think before we do things.
Trust me when i tell you no one can throw a tnatrum like dd, and she can be downright mean to me when she does. But I truly believe that it really is because she trusts me so much that she can let it out.
OK I just read all of that.
People are telling you what they would have done NOT to make you feel bad, but to hope that next time this happens you can maybe try a different approach. Your defenses and hackles are up and you're reading into things that aren't there. They are trying to help for next time by relating things they do with their kids. Because really, that's all any of us has to go on.
She knows mom is mad and didn't hug her goodbye. By that time she had likely forgotten WHY you were mad, and hell, even why SHE was mad, and only knows that you didn't hug her and then lost her sh*t. The connections and attention spans leave a bit to be desired still. As grown up as my DD can be most of the time, she's still only 3.5 and it is very easy for DH and me to forget that sometimes. We sometimes expect too much and then have to step back and change how we do things with her. It's hard.
But don't leave because of this. That's silly.
I agree goose and the way B has acted the last couple of weeks, I can see where it can become difficult to get along. BUT, I also can step back, and look at myself and realize, I sometimes need to just chill the F out, take a deep breath and not contribute to the craziness.
These kids are forever changing and we need to forever change with them. Luckily, my little crab is gone and sweetness has returned but, I know the crab will be back and I'll deal with it then.
I think there is a way to get your point across, in a loving manner. You don't have to do a "well, if you don't do this, then I won't do that", you have to remain the parent.
I'm sorry newly. I really wish you and DD can find a better way . I think your DD is very strong willed and you seem to be as well. The tug of war isn't always worth it.
I'm here if you do ever want to talk.
I'm hanging around to get PMs from people I've known a long time here (& already have quite a few in the last few mins). I've never even seen your screen-name so couldn't give a cr*p whether you think I'm doing it for dramatic reasons.
Ryan 5/2010, Kyle 1/2007, Eric 3/2005
Ouch, that stings. Don't worry, I'm not missing anything in my mother-daughter relationship, TYVM.
This. Really. GBCN-ing is a bit dramatic, no? Every time you post something on here, there are going to be people who disagree. Some of those people are going to be vocal about that disagreement. You need to be able to handle that.
Now, I rarely flame anyone. I keep my mouth shut. But from what I see you post about your other interactions with your DD and your DH, it seems like you are a little shrill and hot-tempered. Not saying it as a personal attack, I?m just saying that?s how it seems?that?s how I was, seriously, before I got medicated. It?s not healthy. Maybe this is your wakeup call to look within yourself.
But leaving over this? No, I don?t think so. And I don?t remember another time people pounced on you or flamed you or anything. Besides, how would we know when you get a BFP?!
Well, I will be flippant now b/c my original comment wasn't meant that way. However, you apparently lack the reading comprehension, so whatevs...
All I can say is thank God my DD and I don't have the relationship you and A do. Because yours? Is less than desired. And, if you can't see that...boy, am I sad for you and what is to come in the future if you don't get your head out of your a$$ and GROW UP.
I'm just getting here and catching up. I'm sure you feel like you're being ganged up on, but what Goose, Eclaires and others have said is true. This isn't the first or second or third time you've posted something like this.
I had (still have) an extremely challenging oldest child, so I get it. But if I'd had a board like this 10 years when he was 2 where I could get advice I would have gladly taken it. You just seem like you want everyone to agree with you and that's not the nature of the world or the parenting board.
If you choose to leave that is up to you, of course, but I do hope you realize that having an outside perspective is important and helpful.
Not sure if you'll see this since you're not really reading the responses here but you should get a book called ScreamFree Parenting by Hal Runkel. It has been a real eye-opener for me and wasn't what I expected it to be at all.
From the book: learn to relate with others in a calm, cool and connected way, take hold of your own emotional responses no matter how anyone else chooses to behave.
It has helped with DD (although we still have some battles) and relationships with others as well.
I think when you calm down a little you should re-read the **advice** others were giving you in that post. Look at it with an open mind and from the perspective of maybe, just maybe, they were trying to help you.
You did not handle the situation very well. I have handled TONS of situations not very well. It helps when I hear how others would have handled it. It helps me the next time, because there is always a next time.
Good luck
If you do leave, I hope that you find another outlet for your venting since I know that you have said countless times how valuable it is for you to have the nest to do so on.?
I think most of us just hope that you realize that this isn't an attack on you that stems from nothing, but that you truly have said some memorable things about your daughter and your relationship with DH on here. ?I can think of several things that you have said that have made my jaw drop in disbelief. ?Try not to be a victim about this and maybe read back on your posts and see what others see. ?Then go from there and try to improve the situation. ?
I am sure nobody really wants you to leave.?