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Q: transitioning from infant to toddler room
Bear with me, because this is long.
DS just turned one year old a few weeks ago. He isn't walking yet, which is fine with me. We feel like he's about to do it any day, but he hasn't. In his infant room, there are four other babies, three who walk and two who don't (including DS). They are all between 12 months and 14 months old. They are all pretty tight!
A new crop of tiny babies is coming into the center over the next couple of months, and I had been hearing through the grapevine that the center was planning to transition all the current, older babies to a toddler room as a group. (It's a work daycare, so we do have a grapevine. 
) This sounded fine to DH and me, because DS will be happy to be with his friends. Part of this deal was that they were also transitioning the toddlers to the twos en masse.
We got a note yesterday that DS is going to start spending time in the toddler room starting August 17, to work up to a full day there on the 31st. DS isn't walking, so I mentioned to the assistant director that I was fine with him visiting the toddler room but that I wouldn't think he would be ready to really transition until he could walk well. She said sure, that he wasn't really transitioning, but that they thought he would be fine with the visits and it would spur him along walking. I assumed all the older babies were doing the same thing.
I found out this morning that it's only DS and two other babies going. And some of the older toddlers are going to stay in the toddler room during this time. The center is leaving one of the walkers and one of the non-walkers behind for now in the infant room. I told the director this morning the same thing I told the assistant, and he basically said what she had -- DS wasn't really transitioning, but that they thought he would be fine with the visits and it would spur him along walking.
After thinking about this some more, I am not sure that I am really comfortable with this. DS is a mature kid emotionally -- definitely more of a toddler than a baby and very independent. (I know that sounds stupid, but KWIM?) But, he can't walk. And he's only 12 months old, so I don't think he's lagging behind by any means. So, I feel like they are kind of pushing DS to walk just so they can get him out of the infant room and make room for the new babies rather than really making sure that he is ready for a transition. It's strange, because I think the director is leaving the other walker behind because that child is still very much a baby emotionally.
On the other hand, I'm not sure that there is anything wrong with doing things to get DS to walk, when he clearly seems ready to do it and just hasn't. I also think he'll have a lot of fun with his walking buddies in a different environment for a couple of hours a day.
DH and I are going to set up a meeting with the director next week to talk about all this, but I wanted to see if you all had any thoughts or experiences with it.
Thanks for reading this, if you've made it this far.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Q: transitioning from infant to toddler room
I'd try to keep an open mind. DD was transitioned to the next room for 12-16mos kids. Walking was a criteria to go in but DD was not really walking yet. She was promoted and was walking within a month. She just needed a little more encouragement as she tended to be on the cautious side. But in regards to everything else, she was ready. The thing is, walking aside, do you think your DS would be happy staying with the infants or with most of his friends in an older room? I know DD would NOT have been happy in a room where she was not receiving age-appropriate stimulation and, from having seen it before working in a nursery, those bored kids can tend to get a little too aggressive (not on purpose, just exploring a bit, ah, vigorously) with the younger infants. One compromise you might want to strike with the director is the ability to move him back to the infant room and move the walker up in his place if, after a month, things are not working out for your DS.
DD -- 5YO
DS -- 3YO
At our center, I think they have to be walking to transition...DD walked at 9 1/2 months though so I didn't experience it first hand, but she had a classmate who didn't walk until 15 months, and was in with the babies until she could.
I agree with the previous poster though...play it by ear, maybe even though he can't walk, he'll like being in a room with toys that are more geared toward his psychological development. If not, ask if he can be moved back. (And FWIW, I don't think you were off by saying he's mature and independent, my DD is the same way!)
Throwing leaves
We were in the same situation, except they weren't transitioning him for space. One of the teachers in the toddler room knew DS from the infant room and really liked him, so she started taking him over there early on. They started taking him over there to hang out for parts of the day and he had a great time, even though he couldn't walk. He was bored with the baby room and they had lots of fun new toys in the toddler room. He was reunited with some of his buddies that had moved up. They would let him take some of the walking toys outside so that he could get around a little better when they all went out there.
When he actually transitioned, he was walking, but not very well and he was still crawling most of the time. It went great for us. I am a big fan of the toddler room and DS does really well there, so I didn't mind him being moved up early. I'd see how it goes with the visits, but I wouldn't let lack of walking be the reason to avoid the transition.
You never know why those kids are not transitioning up--perhaps their families have reasons to keep them in the infant room. There is not much you can do about the other kids, or even ask about because they can't and won't tell you.
But in regards to your own DS, I think the conference with the director is a great idea. DD was walking by the time she turned 1, but that transition was a really hard one. Her infant teacher warned me, "they're not babies in the toddler room anymore and they don't treat them like babies." She was right--there is a huge difference between a 24 m.o. and a 12 m.o. Spend some time with your DS in the room and see how you feel--perhaps he will thrive and just love it. But if he doesn't, then make sure you don't feel pressured because they need a new enrollment and want to clear space in the infant room.
Thanks for your replies! We are meeting with the director on Tuesday morning, and I really appreciate your positive perspectives.
Pesky, I do think he would be lonely without his buddies if they transitioned without him, and left him with a bunch of babies.
DD visited the toddler side a lot before she was walking. Once they started these visits she was walking well in about 3 months. She was just cautious, but her curiosity want to try the toys the other babies were using because they could walk spurred her on. I don't see anything wrong with it.
I actually prefer developmental milestones be the trigger for room transitions over space-making or age.
Kate was born 1-26-2008
Natural m/c on 10-18-09 at 9.5 weeks
Mira was born 9-14-2010
DD transitioned to the "older infant" room in our center at 11 months. The kids in the room were ones she had been with since she started at 3 months. She wasn't walking yet, but all the other kids in the room were. It was over a month until she started walking, but she could cruise and she was emotionally on the same level as the other kids in the room. She also had A LOT more fun (and was more worn out) with the older kids than she was with the babies.
The teachers kept an extra eye on her for that first month since she wasn't walking, but she had no troubles with the transition and it was a great move.
Personally, I think emotional maturity is more important for transitions like this than meeting physical milestones.