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Do you tell DH...

jjabs18jjabs18 member
in Trying to Get Pregnant
when you're ovulating? DH told me yesterday he doesn't want to know when I'm ovulating until after it has already happened. He said he feels less pressure that way.
12/10 Dx with high levels antisperm antibodies (female)
IVF#1 Jan/Feb 2011 Lupron Follistim 1/29
ER 2/10 28 Retrieved 21 Fertilized w/ICSI
ET 2/15 Transferred 2 beautiful embryos, 10 frosties
Beta #1 2/24-141~Beta #2 2/28-1007
1st u/s HB 116 2nd u/s HB 133
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Re: Do you tell DH...

  • a.gravesa.graves member
    DH told me the same thing. So I do not tell him.
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  • nova & paulnova & paul member
    I used to but he asked me not to...sometimes he asks though.
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  • staci4477staci4477
    i thought my dh would stress if he knew, but the complete opposite happened ~ we have had so much fun with the baby making sex, and I feel like we're both in this together.  but you know your dh best ~ do what you think is right for you two.  gl!
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  • chelliefacechellieface
    Mine tries to guess, then he tries to guess when AF is due to guess if we're KU or not, seems like he tries to track a lot actually haha I just realized this Huh?
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  • mystic_Jmystic_J
    I have told mine in the past, but I won't this cycle. It does seem to be too much pressure sometimes for him to know.
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  • juietbridejuietbride member
    I always tell DH, and if I didn't he would ask.  DH doesn't consider it pressure, more so he feels better informed and more involved in the TTC process.  My DH looks at my chart too, he likes to be very involved.  I must admit he has been very involved in most if not all aspects of my life, as he likes me to be involved in most if not all aspects of his life.  We are the attached at the hip kind of couple.
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  • mystikaljessmystikaljess
    Nope! ?Way too much pressure for him. ?
    Natural m/c 12/24/09. IUI #1 BFN. IUI #2 Chemical. IUI #3 BFN. Diagnosis MFI. IVF #1 BFP. Adriana 4/11/12.
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  • Mrs.AndreazzaMrs.Andreazza
    We just started, but for now he doesn't really want to know.  He gets too pressured with things like that, so it's best to just go with the flow and not let him know the details.  It may change it if it takes us awhile.
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  • MrsRDub05MrsRDub05 member

    Yes, because I want him to be involved too. I talk to him about everything so he's becoming pretty educated in TTC, labor, etc. In fact the other day, he was talking to one of our mutual friends who just had a baby w/ his GF and DH was asking him tons of questions including if she was planning to BF. He said "ya, but she's having trouble getting it down so we had a ... um I forget what you call them, come to our house" and w/o skipping a beat DH chimed in "a lactation consultant??"

    But even if I didn't tell him, we both work a lot and don't have sex as much as we used to when we first married, so when I initiate it that many days in a row, he would know anyway!!!Big Smile

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  • EmilyconEmilycon
    Yep!  He wants to know!  I was surprised by this, but it seems to be a good way to stay on the same page!  However, I know this wouldn't work for everyone...so it just depends on your DH!
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  • AutumnBride102007AutumnBride102007 member
    When we first started ttc, i didnt. Then, after about 6 mts, i did. Now..back to no. I hate that we have to worry about their pressures, but no one takes it from us. Ohh to be a man. lol
    10-8-12: Grant is born!! Now a family of 5! 2-3-12: Totally unexpected BFP!! 12-10-10: Vera and Nora are born! *Beta#1(13dpFET):262*~ *Beta#2(20dpFET)4,835 TWINS!!!!!*~*Beta#3(@6wks)11,032 TRIPLETS!!!!! Baby A h/b: 109. Baby B h/b 112. Baby C h/b *praying* 4-6-10: FET (2 ET)....BFP 1-15-10: IVF (2 ET)..... BFN (1-28) 1-12-10: ER! 21 eggs! 10 to keep, 11 to donate :) 8-11-09: IUI #4 (FSH hCG) BFP .... 9-08: C/P 6-19-09: IUI #3 (FSH hCG) BFN 5-28-09: IUI #2 redo (FSH hCG) BFN 5-08-09: HSG: All clear! 4-21-09: IUI #2 canceled (clomid reaction) 4-1-09: IUI #1 (natural) BFN 9/08: S/A less than 5mil (10% mobile) -varicoseal surgery to fix...results worth it! 5/06: Endometriosis surgery 9/07: off of BCP A rejection is Gods protection. A dissapointment is His reappointment
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  • ondjimaondjima member
    I don't it will give him stage fright!
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  • canthardlywait426canthardlywait426
    I don't have a problem telling him, but I don't normally offer the info. I have wacky cycles so he has a hard time "guessing" when I might be. He doesn't see it as pressure when he does know, but sometimes I think it's better to just tell him after.
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  • MrsRDub05MrsRDub05 member
    imagekdodge423:

    Yes. He wants to know when I am getting close so he stops masturbating.

     

    LMAO!!!!!!!! You crack me up!

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  • wood6463wood6463
    yeah I tell mine, he likes knowing but everyone is different.
    TTCing since 2008 Unexplained 3 - IUI's all BFN's IVF#1 July, 2 grade A, 8 cell embies put back, 12 frosties. BFN FET #1 10/30, beta #1 on 11/11/11-352!!!BFP!! Beta #2-1152 image
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  • Rachelilly23Rachelilly23 member
    I started telling DH about this TTC stuff (ovulation, timing, etc), and he tells me just to tell him when to "put it in." Geez.... so no, he's not interested and I have no reason for telling him when we actually start TTC lol.
    Logan Jack- 6.1.10 and Emmett Weston- 9.29.12 

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  • katiengarrettkatiengarrett

    Mine asks. He is full of questions these days. He also like to look at every one's PIP's of pregnancy tests and giving his opinion. He says he is practicing in case I ever have a faint BFP. Smile

    I think that even if I didn't tell him, he would know by how persistant I would be that we have sex.

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  • Carebear1517Carebear1517

    imagemystikaljess:
    Nope!  Way too much pressure for him.

    Exactly this.  DH has gotten "stage fright" a few too many times, so next time I'm ovulating I'm gonna keep it to myself.

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  • MrsRDub05MrsRDub05 member
    imagekdodge423:
    imageMrsRDub05:
    imagekdodge423:

    Yes. He wants to know when I am getting close so he stops masturbating.

     

    LMAO!!!!!!!! You crack me up!

    I'm actaully dead serious.

     

    I know, that's why it's so funny.

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  • EmmaBrookeEmmaBrooke
    I do, but only because he always asks me.  I think the whole charting this is more interesting to him than to me!  Haha!
    BFP July 11, 2009 ~ C/P July 15, 2009
    BFP 11/25/2009 ~ Blighted Ovum Discovered 12/10/2009 ~ Natural M/C 12/24/2009
    BFP 3/29/2010 ~ EDD 11/25/2010

    Sawyer Marshall ~ November 16, 2010
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  • kristanekristane
    I do, only because he thinks it's interesting. We are only 1 month into TTC though, so who knows in the future. He also likes looking at my chart!
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  • KatieM1106KatieM1106

    Temp shift - yes

    OPK - yes

    possible ovulation cramps - yes

    EWCM - no 

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  • illinigalillinigal member

    Up until this cycle, I didn't tell DH, but since I didn't even know (wacky cycles) I couldn't have told DH I was getting ready to O.  This cycle, I decided to use OPKs, and since DH was out of town the day of my 1st positive OPK, I basically told him we had to have sex the 2nd positive OPK day since I was heading out of town for work later that afternoon for several days.  Hopefully, it worked this cycle, but if not, I'm not sure if I'll tell him next cycle or not.

    TTC #1 since October 2008. Dealing with MFI.
    IVF #1 w ICSI in July 2010 = BFN
    IVF #2.1 in Oct 2010 converted to IUI = BFN
    IVF #2.2 w ICSI in Dec 2010 = BFN
    Met with new RE in new city on 1/31/11.
    IVF #3 w ICSI in April 2011. HPT on 5/9 = BFP!
    Beta #1 on 5/10 (10dp5dt) = 99.4. Beta #2 on 5/12 = 284. First u/s on 5/26. = Fraternal TWINS!
    Twin boys born & lost on 8/16/11 at 18w1d due to PPROM & preterm labor.
    IVF #4.1 in Jan 2012 converted to IUI on 1/7/12 = BFN
    IVF #4.2 w ICSI in Feb 2012. Lupron on 2/10. Stims on 2/18. ER on 2/29- 7R,6F
    ET scheduled for 3/5/12- nothing to transfer :(
    Dh seeing new MFI uro & Dh starting meds- June 2012.
    IVF #5 in Dec 2012 = BFFN.
    IVF #6 planned for Spring 2013. Praying for our take home baby/ies.
    **P/SAIF and P/SAL always welcome!**

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  • shortms6shortms6 member
    Yes, I've told mine everything--including showing my chart and explaining everything.  While he won't admit it, he's quite into it all even though he asks a lot of questions.  Stage fright isn't an issue with him (ever). 



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  • ToBeMrsTToBeMrsT member
    yep. 
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  • SpinFreak13SpinFreak13
    Nope. We're just letting it happen. hehe.
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  • KaliChickKaliChick member
    Yes and no.  When I first started using OPKs I would tell him, but now I just tell him the week we need to step it up.  Mainly because he is getting his business off the ground and puts in long hours/nights so he needs to know what nights it's crucial for him to be home.  I don't tell him the exact day I'm ovulating, but he knows the general window.  Sometimes he'll ask me.  The other night I told him everything pointed towards needing to have sex. :)  He knows I use OPKs and he knows I temp but he's never really asked questions about it.  I told him I temp to confirm that I'm ovulating but he doesn't ever really ask for the specifics.  If/When he does, I will explain it all to him, but for the moment he's not that curious about it.

    Our Journey to Brenden
    IVF #1: 4/11(Follistim/Menopur/Ganirelix) 10 retrieved/8 mature and all 8 fertilized / 2 embies transferred ... nothing to freeze Beta 5/10 = BFN
    IVF Take 2 Long Lupron July 2011
    ER 7/3/11 (our 6th anniversary) - 8 retrieved/7 mature/fert ....ET 7/6/11 - 2 beautiful grade A 8 cell embryos
    Beta 7/18/11 - 149!!! Beta 7/21/11 - 311 Beta 7/28/11 - 2,000 8/5/11 - Empty Sac 8/8/11 - There's a yolk sac and maybe a heartbeat 8/12/11 - Fetal pole, yolk sac, heartbeat 8/18/11 - Baby looks GREAT!
    3 babies waiting on ice


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  • Dawn-FaithDawn-Faith
    Yes, I've always told him; before as a form of birth control (I'm not on the pill or anything) and now as a form of trying to conceive. It gives us both a feeling of being in this together.
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