Over-reacting to comment?

kina_21 · August 2009

So DH & I went into the Dr's to get confirmation a week ago and we got a BFP (i think that's right, i'm not good with all these abbreviations). We went back in yesterday and the Dr. said that she estimated that the baby was 10 weeks along and gave me the due date of 2/27/10 she gave me a vaginal ultrasound and I got to see our baby for the first time and heard the heartbeat. It was amazing, beautiful, DH & I cried.

I posted the pictures on FB for family and friends and my father posted this comment, "congratulations, your having an ugly tadpole...that or a fish"

I can't stop crying. I don't know if I'm just taking this the wrong way and it's all these pregnancy hormones but I'm really offended. I wouldn't care if I gave birth to the worlds ugliest dog that's still MY child and you're already judging him/her before they're born?

Should I confront him about it? Block him from all pictures altogether? Pretend that it never happened?

jknallen · August 2009

I would assume that he was joking and to him the picture looked like that. They do look like tadpoles and such early on. But I would be bothered by that comment too, even if it was meant as a joke.

I would just tell him nicely that the comment that he made upset you. I'm sure that he didn't mean it like that and will apologize for saying it. I just wouldn't make it a big deal but would say something.

dtrigg · August 2009

Delete the comment and call him to let him know that even joking comments of that nature aren't funny and are bound to keep your 'ugly tadpole' away from him.

Tess12 · August 2009

It was a stupid comment, but I wouldn't take it personally. There's nothing really to see at that point to judge ugly or beautiful. He was probably trying (and failing) to be funny. A simple, "not funny, dad" will hopefully get your point across.

mlf625 · August 2009

jknallen:
I would just tell him nicely that the comment that he made upset you.? I'm sure that he didn't mean it like that and will apologize for saying it.? I just wouldn't make it a big deal but would say something.

Great advice.

I think 1st trimester u/s look kind of creepy, that doesn't mean I'm judging my baby.?

Summer20 · August 2009

Yeah his comment was rude, but I do think you are overreacting too. I mean, most early ultrasounds do look a little weird - we called ours "the blob" and then "peanut" because that's what it looked like in the first 2. I'd just brush it off, or tell him it's "you're" not "your"

Ms.lucky13 · August 2009

I'm sure he was trying to be humorous, I'm sure he meant nothing by it. If it upset you too much talk to him about it and I'm sure he'll explain just that.

kina_21 · August 2009

Thanks! I'll just have to let him know it wasn't that funny. Yeah he/she kind of looks like an oddly shaped pea-pod.

gingerfamily · August 2009

It was a joke. Chill.

JARbaby · August 2009

He was trying to be funny. You are taking it the wrong way. If you confront him over something so silly you will look the fool, or simply a hormonal pregnant woman, so play it cool and let it go.

GRKaters · August 2009

LOL -- forget about it. Or you're in for a loooong 40 weeks. I'd guess he was just kidding around, and, not having crazy-whacked pg hormones streaming through his blood, has no idea his all-in-fun comment could cause such a meltdown.

veggieball · August 2009

I am so sorry that your dad posted this. Maybe he posted this as more of a joke. I would wait a couple of days and then give him a call to let him know how you feel. A lady at my work this week saw my ultrasound and said that my baby looks like an alien and the LO does kind of look like an alien at this point.

Danikat15 · August 2009

Ya know, honestly, most early ultrasounds I see are pretty rough. You have to kind of tilt your head and use you imagination to figure out what's what. I got mine done yesterday and it was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. The tech didn't have to tell us which way was up. Sure, it looked like a gummy bear or teddy graham, but seeing it move and that little heart beating completely blinds you. Now you might look at my pic, without that experience, and not know what to make of it.

I agree with previous posts not to make a big deal out of it. I'm sure he was trying to be funny, not hurt your feelings. I would talk to him if it bothers you.

David'sgirl · August 2009

I would say "yeah he looks just like his grandpa" it was a joke I'm sure.

jenny1980 · August 2009

mrsh0606:
It was a joke. Chill.

Ditto.

I'm a little concerned you're (still) literally crying about this.

liza0828 · August 2009

jenny1980:

mrsh0606:
It was a joke. Chill.
Ditto.
I'm a little concerned you're (still) literally crying about this.

Double ditto.

Erica Ciaccio · August 2009

I think daddies get a little freaked out when their little girl gets knocked up. Atleast I think mine did. When I went to show him my ultra-sound, he shrugged it off and said "Those things weird me out." I think there is a certain level of jealousy that can come from a father when he realizes his little girl is having a baby.

In your defense - you have every right to be annoyed. That comment was just not necessary. Have you ever heard of if you dont have anything nice to say dont say anything at all? Facebook comments can easily be misinterpreted and I would stress about it. All things considered you should probably just brush it off... I did.

pandagirl15 · August 2009

We called our baby a smudge in the 1st ultrasound. But it was kind of mean to put it on your FB. I would just leave another comment saying how it wasn't very nice, but be a little funny with it. It will get the point across. On a side note, you're due on my birthday, it's a good day!

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