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1st Trimester
RadicalDreamer143
member
Vent, feel like crying
RadicalDreamer143
member
I know I've mentioned before that we just bought a house, and we just started a kitchen renovation. This would normally stress me out a LOT, especially with everything else going on - I'm currently negotiating an unexpected job offer, battling m/s and stomach cramps, and my inlaws (thank GOD I love them) will be arriving on Tuesday to "help." My FIL will help a lot, but I'll probably be entertaining my MIL till I start work - again, not a huge deal, but there will be no privacy for me and DH till mid September.
DH's uncle has been staying at our house 4 days every week (Thurs through Sun) for the past three weeks, "helping out." Meaning, he will get it in his head to use an electric trimmer on our bushes, making them look like Edward Scissorhands had a drunken party in our front yard... and then not clean up, expecting me to do it. One hour, 35 mosquito bites, and him RETRIMMING the area I JUST cleaned later, I gave up on it. I'll pass the HOA fine on to him.
So anyway, he was supposed to take this weekend off (aka, I get a weekend off) since my mother, stepfather, and two brothers invited themselves to sleep over this weekend. Joy - this means I'll get nothing done, because my mother has to be the center of attention, and won't allow me to work - this house needs A LOT of work. I have no kitchen, remember? However, I figured I would relax, and finally get some "us" time for me and DH before my mother gets here, since my in-laws arrive on Tuesday.
I couldn't sleep last night, due to nausea, heartburn, and general insomnia. I finally fell asleep at 6am. At 9am, I wake up, thinking someone is breaking into my house - it's DH's uncle, with a frickin CROWBAR at my back door! "Well, you apparently want to sleep your life away, and I need to get work done." WTF, he wasn't supposed to BE HERE! DH calls me, no joke, 30 seconds later, saying, "I just checked my email, and apparently he changed his mind, and is coming over."
O.M.F.G. Today's arguments already consisted of, "NO, you CANNOT tear down any walls in the kitchen, I didn't measure yet how much has to be removed, and regardless that isn't happening till my FIL gets here. Yes, I have gained weight, are you planning on keeping a fat diary for me? Don't answer that. NO, my wussy ragdoll cat CANNOT go outdoors, a squirrel would eat her because she doesn't have survival instincts. (I had to lock her in a room because he is deliberately trying to allow her to slip out). No, the old cabinets can't get hung in the garage yet, I didn't strip/paint them yet.... actually, screw it, go ahead, I don't frickin care anymore." This is where he is now, blasting some horrible hippy music crap that even my mother (who WAS a hippy) would consider horrible.
I never cry. Not even during The Notebook. But this... this is just too much. I feel like breaking the news to my SIL who lives two hours away, and then begging her to let me stay there for a few days, because this horrible man has managed to take over my whole house, and somehow made a year+ foreclosure look worse than it did when I bought it.
DH's uncle has been staying at our house 4 days every week (Thurs through Sun) for the past three weeks, "helping out." Meaning, he will get it in his head to use an electric trimmer on our bushes, making them look like Edward Scissorhands had a drunken party in our front yard... and then not clean up, expecting me to do it. One hour, 35 mosquito bites, and him RETRIMMING the area I JUST cleaned later, I gave up on it. I'll pass the HOA fine on to him.
So anyway, he was supposed to take this weekend off (aka, I get a weekend off) since my mother, stepfather, and two brothers invited themselves to sleep over this weekend. Joy - this means I'll get nothing done, because my mother has to be the center of attention, and won't allow me to work - this house needs A LOT of work. I have no kitchen, remember? However, I figured I would relax, and finally get some "us" time for me and DH before my mother gets here, since my in-laws arrive on Tuesday.
I couldn't sleep last night, due to nausea, heartburn, and general insomnia. I finally fell asleep at 6am. At 9am, I wake up, thinking someone is breaking into my house - it's DH's uncle, with a frickin CROWBAR at my back door! "Well, you apparently want to sleep your life away, and I need to get work done." WTF, he wasn't supposed to BE HERE! DH calls me, no joke, 30 seconds later, saying, "I just checked my email, and apparently he changed his mind, and is coming over."
O.M.F.G. Today's arguments already consisted of, "NO, you CANNOT tear down any walls in the kitchen, I didn't measure yet how much has to be removed, and regardless that isn't happening till my FIL gets here. Yes, I have gained weight, are you planning on keeping a fat diary for me? Don't answer that. NO, my wussy ragdoll cat CANNOT go outdoors, a squirrel would eat her because she doesn't have survival instincts. (I had to lock her in a room because he is deliberately trying to allow her to slip out). No, the old cabinets can't get hung in the garage yet, I didn't strip/paint them yet.... actually, screw it, go ahead, I don't frickin care anymore." This is where he is now, blasting some horrible hippy music crap that even my mother (who WAS a hippy) would consider horrible.
I never cry. Not even during The Notebook. But this... this is just too much. I feel like breaking the news to my SIL who lives two hours away, and then begging her to let me stay there for a few days, because this horrible man has managed to take over my whole house, and somehow made a year+ foreclosure look worse than it did when I bought it.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Vent, feel like crying
This! Go do something nice for yourself, even if it's only for a little bit. You have earned some "ME time"!!!
DD1: allergic to eggs & dairy
c/p 4/1/11
DD2: milk and soy protein intolerant, allergic to eggs, soy, peanuts, tree nuts, sesame, bananas
MSPI Moms Check-In Blog
I am so sorry you have to deal with this all at the same time.
*Hugs* I think your DH should talk to his Uncle about 'his help' because renovations can be very overwhelming to begin with let alone when you have some one in your face trying to do stuff. It sounds like his heart is in the right place, but man I feel for you.
I agree with PP you need to go and have some you time, a mani & pedi sound good or even a massage.
Good Luck
Even better... he has keys, apparently, to the back door, but he LOST THEM. So I have to re-key, and obviously not give them to him (DH did this without telling me).
DH gets his feelings hurt if I "yell at his uncle" - sorry, but people need to say something when he takes the bathmat from the master bathroom and uses it as a kneeler (even though I provided him with an actual kneeler) in the kitchen, so now it's ruined - and I don't yell. The entire situation is making me a very bitter person. I'm about 800 miles from anyone in my family - only his uncle and brother live down here - so I can't even escape with a girl's day out.
I have never had to really fight with my DH - these days if I even bring up his uncle's name, his lips get all tight and he cringes. I'm just hoping that when my FIL gets here, he'll fight with the uncle and cause the uncle to not show up anymore.
I JUST got a call from my MIL, and she hasn't stopped saying how sorry she is that I am dealing with this. I told her if I am not here when she arrives, I'll be two hours away at her other son's house, and she completely understands.
This! I don't understand why you don't have a say in all of this? Whether your uncle provided 'help', or family constantly coming and going - this is your home AND your marriage AND your pregnancy! You call the shots! Put your foot down, and tell your DH you need his support in the process.