When did you tell family about your SAL?

msipowicz · July 2009

I am torn. DH wants to tell immediate fam now. I don't want to tell until after 8 weeks (the first breath of fresh air, as my dr puts it). I am even weary about this because my last m/c was at 10 weeks.

What did you ladies do?

RJHarmon · July 2009

We told immediate family right away. We would have wanted the support should something had happened again. We told extended relatives and everyone else after we heard the hb on the doppler at 10w3d.

kate1011 · July 2009

I'm torn like you. It's scary because I don't want to have to go though explaining what happened if we loose this one too. But at the same time the support system would be better, if something should happen...

At this time only my mom knows, she's encouraging us to tell the rest of the fam; but is respectful of our wishes not to. I plan on waiting until after my first u/s in 3 weeks to make sure the lo is developing correctly and can hear a heart beat - then we'll tell more fam and wait until the 2nd trimester for everyone else.

kmtfu · July 2009

We told parents at 12 weeks, siblings at 14 weeks and let the rest get out by word of mouth. We always said we'd wait till 12 weeks so the first time around, nobody ever knew...

TinaL99 · July 2009

RJHarmon:
We told immediate family right away. We would have wanted the support should something had happened again.

This, and we told a couple of friends b/c when we were at their house last weekend they knew something was up b/c I wasn't drinking. And I will be telling my BFF and her DH this weekend. I figure that they would know if something went wrong so they deserve to know the good news too!

beaner628 · July 2009

We told my mom right away because she knew we were going through infertility treatments. I told my Dad around 7 weeks, his dad around 7 weeks and his mom at 11 weeks.

Anna&Matt · July 2009

We told our parents the day we got our BFP. Then we told our siblings around 8 wks, close friends around 10 and the world at 12 (after our NT scan came back great).

Shemico · July 2009

So far told BFF at 5 weeks (after 2nd beta), i'd tell her if we had a loss too. Other then that only the detist knows.

Thinking we will tell parents at 8 weeks and everyone else at 12 after NT scan (including DD).

MrsGhappilyeverafter · July 2009

We told my parents at 5ish weeks and DH's parents at 10 weeks. I knew my parents could keep it a secret and DH's couldn't so we waited longer to tell his parents. We announced it on facebook at 12 weeks because we have a doppler and felt secure letting the world know at that point.

SPC2007 · July 2009

I told my mom and sister right away but that is it. my close friends found out at 10 weeks and dh's family found out at 16 weeks.

kristinem17 · July 2009

We told our immediate family (parents and only sibling) from the get go, as they knew about our infertility and our IVF journey from the start of it... we also told 3 close friends. We are not telling any other family or friends until 13-14 weeks (2nd trimester).

When we were pg last year, we never told anyone and then we had the m/c and didn't share that with anyone either... it was tough. So this time around we wanted to include our parents and close friends.

MarisaC · July 2009

I'm not spilling the beans until after my NT scan.

mrstyson03 · July 2009

We still haven't told yet. We would probably tell them in a 2 weeks after my next appointment, but since my whole fam is coming to my house in 4 weeks we'll tell them then. I want to be able to see their faces and their reactions and take pics (I'm a dork), so I'll hold out until then.

ibis · July 2009

We told family right away.

I have mixed feelings about doing that, because on the one hand, it was really nice to have someone besides DH to talk to in the early weeks. It made it feel more real and less like limbo. On the other hand, everyone was so overly cautious in their reactions that it kind of made me feel like a ticking time bomb, and it made me sad sometimes that I didn't get a "yay! Congrats!" reaction to this pg.

labbie1821 · July 2009

We told family at 9 weeks, and slowly let it out to our friends after that point. Now everyone knows and we have a lot of support, it's the best feeling in the world!

Good Luck with making your own decision!

DrDPM · July 2009

I m/c'd at 13 weeks. When we got pregnant again, my DH felt the same as yours; he wanted to tell everyone right away and enjoy the pregnancy with our families for however long it lasted. I, on the other hand, was so worried about something going wrong that I wanted to wait until I was past 13 weeks. I'll be 15 weeks tomorrow, and everyone knows but our parents. Honestly, I would have liked to wait until 20 weeks, but my parents are coming up tomorrow, and there's no hiding that I'm pregnant.

Lanette · July 2009

We wanted to actually wait until 12wks, but ended up telling @ 10 (on Mother's day). It was hard to keep it from some people, but it was much easier than the thought of having to un-tell again later on. I did let my boss know very early since I was going in every other day during the 1st wk for bloodwork and every 2 wks during 1st tri for check-ups & u/s. Also, I just figured if anything went wrong it would be easier if she already knew and no extra explanation would be needed. GL on whatever you decide to do & GL with this pg

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