Does anyone else just want 1 child?

CariVin · July 2009

I was just curious... my DH and I are so excited about having a baby, but we really only want a small family. Does anyone else feel this way and if so, what are your reasons?

B!tchBeckman · July 2009

Yep-

we're stopping at 2.

he has 4 brothers and one sister with his mom and 3 step siblings with his dad-

I only have the one sister...

However we had talked for a long time and me originally wanting 5 was brought down to 2. (No middle kids-) and after this second pregnancy, Im glad I agreed to only 2. this one is murder! lol.

creed612 · July 2009

My husband and I feel the same way. We feel that financially we wouldn't be able to provide everything that we would like to give our children if we had more than one. It's just so expensive! Being an only child isn't necessarily a bad thing. We have many cousins for the LO to play with!

bellapup · July 2009

I originally only wanted 1 but then my DH talked me into two. I have 3 siblings and DH has 4. I think 2 is a perfect number. Also, I think these days it's perfect because I couldn't imagine paying for 4 kids to go to college.I can't imagine what the cost of that will be in 20 years. Yikes!

liza0828 · July 2009

DH would like two... I'm taking a wait and see approach... let's see how one goes, is my thinking!

No more than two though. A couple reasons-- we live in a high cost of living area, and we wouldn't be able to afford a big family. Also, we are getting older (I'm 36, DH is 41), so if we wanted a big family, we needed to start earlier than this!

madameprimm · July 2009

Because of my husband's career goal I'm thinking this will be it. I know he wanted a big family, but I explained sweetly that I will not be a single mother to a ton of children. I'm ecstatic that we're having this baby considering it was determined that conceiving on our own was not probable, but one child having to miss out on their father being there is more than enough.

skylined21 · July 2009

i absolutely only want one child, i grew up with a brother and felt that much of what i wanted/needed as the younger child was neglected or overshadowed. the debate still goes on in my house, DH wants 2 as he was an only child, i told him i love the experience of being pregnant and I'm sure i will appreciate the child birth but once is enough for me so he either needs to go find a girlfriend for his 2nd or squeeze it out himself.

Arcadia1114 · July 2009

DH is an only child. While my sister is my best friend, financially we can not afford to properly raise more than one child. Day care alone is going to cost over $1000 a month.

AmandaAllison · July 2009

I only want one and my husband agrees. I don't know why exactly, but I really just want the one.

AmandaToo · July 2009

liza0828:

DH would like two... I'm taking a wait and see approach... let's see how one goes, is my thinking!

No more than two though. A couple reasons-- we live in a high cost of living area, and we wouldn't be able to afford a big family. Also, we are getting older (I'm 36, DH is 41), so if we wanted a big family, we needed to start earlier than this!

Except for the age, we're in the same boat. I am OK with 1. DH pushes for 2. We'll see. I'm not worried we'll disagree, though. We tend to come to terms well. We also believe in zero population growth as something we want to support, so no more than 2 for us.

izziebee · July 2009

We only plan to have one...although I would like 2 DH is pretty firm on stopping after this one. We both grew up with 3 siblings - his were all close in age, for me however I was the youngest with the next oldest 9 years older than me so I pretty much grew up as an only child.

If we had started earlier (I'll be 37 at birth and DH will almost be 40) then maybe we would have had one more but as it is, I really had to work on my DH before he would agree to having the one at this age. He's very fearful of not being there for his child as we age. My parents had me at 39(mom)/45(dad) and they are still very active and involved in their 70s/80s so that's how I intend to be!

Hip2Bsquare · July 2009

We are only having 1

Mrs_Springbride · July 2009

i only want 1. We have a 3 bedroom house, but the 3rd bedroom is very very small, and is being used as our office. I would feel terrible sticking a kid in that room. it barely fits our desk and file cabinet, and TV.

JustAhopin · July 2009

We've always said 1-2 kids.

We don't want to bite off more that we can chew. We've seen people with number of kids that doesn't seem like they can really handle them.

We really feel we can handle and afford one. We'll see how we feel after being parents for awhile if we want another. We both say definately not 3.

Marc's Mrs. · July 2009

We'll be one and done. I'm 36 and DH is 47. He also has three kids from a previous marriage. Also, financially, it just makes sense for us to stop at one.

lulupinkerton · July 2009

I was okay with having only one. But DH made a good point: If we only have one, then when that child has kids their kids won't have any cousins. So, I think we are set on 2.

johannaknip · July 2009

I am an only child and love it still. I know hubs loves his brother but he is OK with one too. Most of our conversations go 'if we had another' not when. I am not trying to sound like I think I am amazing, but I feel part of the reason I am so creative and independent is because I am an only. I'm so focused on THIS baby, I cannot even think about any thing else.

acaudill75 · July 2009

I always wanted two children, but I think one is going to do it for me. I told DH that after having m/s, this will be my last pregnancy. Maybe I will change my mind later on, but right now, I am firm. I know he is hoping I am pregnant with twins (both my parents, and his father, are twins), but I told him to feel free to carry twins, I am praying for a singleton. I want a little girl so badly, but I suppose I will love a little boy almost as much (just kidding, don't flame me).

QCinOct · July 2009

I'd love to have 2 but DH is okay stopping at 1, and given our ages (I'm 34, he's 47) and the fact that it took 16 cycles to get a BFP this time around, I think time is on his side and not mine

Meli0604 · July 2009

We want 2. I have a brother & sister, but I am the oldest. My fiance has 2 sisters, but he is the youngest. My brother and I are only 3 years apart and he is my best friend. I honestly can't imagine growing up without him My sister is 11 years younger than me, so she was essentially an only child. My brother and I were teenagers so she didnt have anyone her age to play with. We have cousins close to her age but of course she did not see them every day.

I want my baby to have what I had. My brother and I share a special bond and I feel like my sister missed out on that. My fiance and I can afford 2 so that's what we're having. But no more than that This pregnancy is kicking my behind - I can't imagine going through this more than 2 times!

Meegs10.13.06 · July 2009

I've always said I want 2... I love the relationship I have with my brother... but we'll take a cross that bridge when it comes stance I think. Sometimes I can't imagine not having two... sometimes I can't imagine not just lavishing all my love on one! Lol. Right now we're just so grateful for this baby.

AshA32 · July 2009

Pregnant with my first, I said "this is it. the one and only"... 5 years later his brother came along. Then I had my ex husband get a vasectomy. Now here it is just weeks after my second wedding I get a BFP.. #3 will be born just before my youngest turns 8 and probably close to when my oldest turns 13. AND THIS IS IT! NO MORE!

seriously... I mean it this time.

RadicalDreamer143 · July 2009

lulupinkerton:
I was okay with having only one. But DH made a good point: If we only have one, then when that child has kids their kids won't have any cousins. So, I think we are set on 2.

This. It's just one of the reasons we're having more than one.

SuzEJ · July 2009

I sort of liked the idea of having only one. But now I (and DH) want two. There is nothing else quite like the relationship between siblings. Plus, when the big things later on in life happen (like taking care of aging parents and eventually losing them), you have someone with whom to go through it all other than your spouse.

maria120 · July 2009

lulupinkerton:
I was okay with having only one. But DH made a good point: If we only have one, then when that child has kids their kids won't have any cousins. So, I think we are set on 2.

They could still have cousins on the other side of the family though--I don't have any on my dad's side, but have 14 on my mom's side.

lulupinkerton · July 2009

Maria-

Oh, yeah, duh... Pregnancy brain at it's best. Doh!

nikll34 · July 2009

I want a big family, but financially I don't think is it possible. We have talked about it and agreed to see what the future brings and if we can afford it we will. In the mean time we are thinking that 2 is a good number and maybe I can talk him into 3 someday.

As long as I have a healthy, happy, stable family I don't think I will mind if we only have 2!

NiniJ55 · July 2009

We had such a hard time getting pregnant in the first place and I don't ever intend to go through that again. So if this is our only child - we are happy with that.

If God blesses me with one more I will be happy with that too (I don't plan to use any birth control)... but I think I will pretty much stop there. I don't want to have to struggle to provide for my children... so personal for us a large family is not right.

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