3rd Trimester

Need your opinion before I call

My step-sister hasn't called me in a month to see how the baby and I have been doing. ?The last time I saw her was at my shower which was the end of last month. ?She called this morning but I was sleeping and my DH told her I would call her later today. I'm getting ready to call her now. ?If you were me would you say something to her about not calling you for a month to check up on you? ?Oh yeah, we bought a house last July and she has yet to come by and see it or us even though she said she would soon. ?We both work in different school systems so I know she has been off from work for the summer as well.
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Re: Need your opinion before I call

  • You could mention that it has been a long time since you last spoke to eachother and wanted to know if everything was ok.
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  • I don't think you should ask why she hasn't called "to check on you". That seems like a silly expectation - to get regular phone calls just to see how you're doing. Phones work both ways.. you could have been calling her.?

    ?

  • Maybe she has been busy, IMO I seriously wouldn't take it personally.  She's calling you now isn't she?  I just don't see the big deal here.
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  • I guess it depends on how close you are to her. If your not that close then I might not say anything, but if you two are very close, then yes, you could ask her whats up.  Regardless, she is family, so if something is bothering you, you should be able to talk to her about it.....good luck.
  • hmmm I guess I don't feel like I need anyone to call and see how I am doing - it works both ways.  Have you not called her in a month either? Being pregnant doesn't make me feel like I have wait for people to call me, so I'm not sure you need to say anything to her about it.
  • My brother never calls me. I think he is just too wrapped up in himself. You can mention to her how you wish you guys would talk more. Maybe she didn't realize that this was bothering you.
  • imageMrsBeckO:

    I don't think you should ask why she hasn't called "to check on you". That seems like a silly expectation - to get regular phone calls just to see how you're doing. Phones work both ways.. you could have been calling her. 

     

    Agreed.

  • Why does she have to call to check on you? Are you on bed rest having complications?  If not then maybe shes just living her life... 

    I have two girls.. umm my BILs GF and DH bestfriends wife who still have yet to acknowledge Im pregnant.. oh and I see them at least once amonth...

  • imagejenna0627:
    imageMrsBeckO:

    I don't think you should ask why she hasn't called "to check on you". That seems like a silly expectation - to get regular phone calls just to see how you're doing. Phones work both ways.. you could have been calling her. 

     

    Agreed.

    Ditto!

  • I was thinking the same thing about both of my older sisters, whom I haven't heard from in ages.  Then I remembered that I am guilty of not calling them either.  Phone does work both ways. 
  • imageMrsBeckO:

    I don't think you should ask why she hasn't called "to check on you". That seems like a silly expectation - to get regular phone calls just to see how you're doing. Phones work both ways.. you could have been calling her. 

    This. My sister has seen me once this entire pregnancy and has never once called, nor do I expect her to call after the baby is born. Sucks but its just how she is.

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  • imagebabsrut:
    I was thinking the same thing about both of my older sisters, whom I haven't heard from in ages.  Then I remembered that I am guilty of not calling them either.  Phone does work both ways. 
    I agree.
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  • This really depends on your relationship.  I don't even know my step-sister's phone number and would find it odd if she's calling to check up on me...

    If my parents or grandma didn't call for awhile, I would probably be worried and would call them after a week or two.  Just because I'm pregnant doesn't mean I expect my relationships to become one sided.  So I guess I would question why YOU haven't called her in a month if you had not heard from her?

    She might have been busy, or has some stuff going on in her life.  I wouldn't accuse her when you talk to her.  If you are genuinely concerned (that maybe she's mad at you or maybe something's happening in her life that's complicated) then you can casually mention that you have not heard from her in awhile and are wondering if everything is ok.

  • I guess the reason I expected her to call more is that I am the youngest sibling, I was there for her during her pregnancy, I live over an hour away from all of our family and I was there for her during her pregnancy. ?I've always lived my life not expecting anything from most people so that I don't get disappointed...I guess this is why.
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  • imageJCM083009:
    hmmm I guess I don't feel like I need anyone to call and see how I am doing - it works both ways.  Have you not called her in a month either? Being pregnant doesn't make me feel like I have wait for people to call me, so I'm not sure you need to say anything to her about it.

    This.

    Why haven't you called her?  Just because she isn't pregnant doesn't mean you can't call to check on her, either.

  • imageJamaicanlove:
    I guess the reason I expected her to call more is that I am the youngest sibling, I was there for her during her pregnancy, I live over an hour away from all of our family and I was there for her during her pregnancy.  I've always lived my life not expecting anything from most people so that I don't get disappointed...I guess this is why.

    Being the youngest doesn't entitle you to special treatment. I'm sorry to sound rude but I hate when people pull the I am the youngest/baby of the family card.

  • Now that she has called I would just let it go and try to move forward.  Now isn't a time to start up family feuds and give yourself more stress.

    If it is important to you that you see her, maybe try being a little more proactive in contacting her - not sure what you have/have not done, but if you haven't really been in touch with her from your end either, maybe be the bigger person and bug her.

    By the way, I have lived in my house for 3 years now and my sister has only been there twice for a couple hours each time at most - I am lucky to even receive an email on facebook from her every once in a while! 

  • Does the phone only work one way? She could always say you could have called her.
  • Have you called her?  Have you invited her over for lunch or dinner?  Relationships are two way - she may not have wanted to bother you.
  • imageJamaicanlove:
    I guess the reason I expected her to call more is that I am the youngest sibling, I was there for her during her pregnancy, I live over an hour away from all of our family and I was there for her during her pregnancy.  I've always lived my life not expecting anything from most people so that I don't get disappointed...I guess this is why.

    image 

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