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He Came Home.
I guess he came by the house around 1pm, but we weren't here (that's when I went to exchange the vacuum). And then he came to the house again right after we left for the laundromat (no dryer + week of rain). He spotted the car on his way to a motel. So he stopped. And he talked to the kids and glared at me.
When we got home from the mat, he was asleep in our bedroom. He came downstairs a few minutes ago to mumble sorry and say that sleeping in the truck all night sucked (you think?). And then he ate 2 slices of cold pizza and went back to bed.
I don't know what to think. I'm still hurt and angry over the things he said. He lost a lot of my trust in him. I just dunno.
And to think, his vacation starts tomarrow. 2 weeks.
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Re: He Came Home.
Tales of the Wife
UGh. I'm glad he's safe and came home to you and your family, but that's a tough situation. Will you be able to talk without the kids around soon?
Continuing to think of and pray for you...
Mother's Day, 2011
::hugs::
I've been thinking about you all day. I think it's probably a good thing that his vacation is starting. It will give you some time to talk this over carefully without having to worry about work stress too. I hope that if you tell him how he made you feel he will see why what he said was wrong.
I know it's really hard when you're so hurt, but try not to push him away if he does try to make amends.
Could you guys see a counselor or a minister (are you religious?) to act as a moderator?
::hugs again::
(((hugs)))
I hope it all works out for the best, whatever that ends up being in your case. ?I'm sorry. ??
I've been thinking about you all day too! I'm really glad he came home and although it's not going to fix things right away, at least he did say he was sorry and knows he was in the wrong.
I agree with cracker though, I think a 2 week vacation from work might be just what you two need. I'd really try seeing if you could find someone to talk to just so you get everything out in the open and start with a blank slate.
Also, I'm not sure how much your DH normally does around the house, but I think picking up a few domestic tasks really would make him more appreciative. I know when a wife stays at home, sometimes men don't feel like they should have to do anything b/c that is your job, but still, I think it could help. Maybe he can sweep the house before the kids go to bed, or make dinner once a week, or be in charge of washing dishes or laundry. I think it would help him realize how hard that stuff is with 3 kids!
And I think you said you are having some money troubles, but try to see if you and DH can get away for a night out on a date. Maybe you can swap babysitting with someone and just pack a picnic and go hiking. It'll give you time to reconnect and remember it's not about how clean you keep the counter tops!
GL and I'll be thinking about you two!
(big hugs)
I don't know how much of this directly correlates, but DH & I went through a rough patch after DS was born when he went back to work. His work was incredibly stressful, and he dealt with it by bringing it home - not being really here when he was at home, and not really relating to me or DS - more just tuning out and focusing on his stress. It really upset me - it was the first time that I really questioned our marriage. It took a few months, but things have gotten a lot better - he's tuned in (of course it helps that he SAH) and I've learned to let go of the anger that I had towards him about the way he acted during that period.
Anyhow - I hope you and your DH are able to work through this and get passed the issues you are having lately. It sucks, and I'll be praying for you both. I imagine the work/money situation is not helping things at all - I think it's incredibly hard for (men especially) to seperate those stresses, and perhaps that's contributing to his assinine behavior. (huge hugs)
Is it bad that I'm slightly gratified that he slept in the truck? Somehow, that makes me feel just the slightest bit vindicated for you.
You know my thoughts on the situation. I am relieved he came home, and I am praying for you both that you will be able to find quick and complete healing for your relationship.
((hugs))
The sadness he caused yesterday is inexcusable. His physical discomfort is no match for the ache in your soul.
BTW -- I shipped a VERY VERY happy package to you today. Come on over to the batcave if you want to know more.
nanananananananana-BAT CAVE!