POLL: Best Thing About Adoption.....

*Erin&Mike* · July 2009

I know there are many things that are difficult about adoption/foster care/foster adopt. (Time, $$$, Emotional rollercoaster, Travel, etc) But there are also many great things. What is the best thing about it-with the exception of the little one...because we all know that is by far the best part. Big Smile

I'm curious what other people think....

*Erin&Mike* · July 2009

For me-it's been the growing of my relationship with my husband. When we got our dx of IF in 7/08 we were devestated. Almost a year to the day later we had our homestudy approved. And our relationship couldn't be stronger. We are closer than ever and honestly feel that if we can overcome IF and make it through the adoption process ( Smile

-hey some of the info they want is pretty ridiculous you have to admit...) we can make it through pretty much anything!

TiffanyBlue927 · July 2009

Well, last night my friend and I were sitting around on my deck, having a few drinks, and I said to her "How cool is it that I am expecting a baby in 4 weeks and I can still have a beer!!!"

We were actually talking about the very dangerous birth story she lived through ( she bled out after baby was born and could have died) and I was, for once, glad I never have to deal with THAT. She is fine now but I am really scared for her if she has another baby, and she is trying! Now I will be a nervous wreck for her when she gets PG.

TTCgradstud · July 2009

I actually look forward to not being pg! Like TiffanyBlue, I have heard/ seen the tough pgs. One friend had a very early premie, and one friend is having a really rough pg- she's already said she isn't doing it again. I'm okay with passing on that! Plus, even though our failed adoption makes me sad sometimes, the baby is alive and living with a family that choose to keep her, which is less upsetting to me then the thought of a m/c.

Oh, and not having people feel the need to touch my belly is pretty good too!

julandjo · July 2009

For me it will be the joy of having a baby again, but without the scary health problems pregnancy/birth gives me, and without a c-section to also recover from. And hopefully, not another NICU/preemie experience! I get giddy when I think about getting up with a baby in the night, and not worrying about both my surgical pain and uncontrolled blood pressure/hormone issues. Those were really scary times, and it definitely kept me from enjoying new motherhood. It'll be a whole new experience; I'm really looking forward to it!

CaptainSerious · July 2009

Knowing that in making our dream to be parents come true, we are also providing a loving home to a child or children who would otherwise be raised in an orphanage.

LadyRed7 · July 2009

for us, it has been wonderful. To go through such an amazing, tough yet heartwarming experience with MH whom i love so much is just the best. We are so excited and looking forward to being active, and it all has made us so much closer and even more in love.

PSU-NCBride · July 2009

I think the best part has been the sense of community we have felt not only from friends and family but strangers too. People have taken a real interest in our journey and in turn our son. It has provided him so much support. I know everyone would have loved him regardless, but somehow the way we had to fight for him makes people feel connected to us and him? Not sure if that makes sense.

Also, we have really enjoyed getting to learn about new things and opening our eyes more. We have fun trying to figure out what sports we want to introduce him to first. One of my husband's favorite snowboarders is biracial so I have a feeling he will be introducing him to that at an early age!

Sally J · July 2009

Not having to recover from they physical part of labor and delivery.

Gaining an extended family from my DD's foster family.

Opening my eyes to whole new world that I may not have experienced. The sense of community that I feel when I connect with others who have experienced adoption.

Learning more about my husband through the homestudy process. After 10 years together I thought I knew just about everything and it turns out I didn't! It was really fun to learn those things.

Being able to provide my DD with a strong, independant female role model and give her the opportunities to live a fulfilled life.

Getting to have virtual twins without going through the risky pregnancy.

-Stephanie- · July 2009

After 7+ years of infertility and treatments, the adoption process has brought HOPE back into our home. I think that might be the best part for us.

Dr.Loretta · July 2009

Realizing what a good marriage DH and I have.

BB&J · July 2009

Hmmmm.....good question.

The other couples that we traveled to China with when we adopted are now like our family. We get together every year for a reunion. It's like 10 mothers simultaneously went into labor together and delivered their babies all at the same time.

Not having to give up drinking.

Also, you sort of get to brag about your kid in a way that birthmothers can't because although alot of their personalities are affected in environment, there's still a biological element too. So if I say how beautiful I think my daughter is, I'm not saying it's a reflection on me

BB&J

tct1219 · July 2009

i think the best thing for me is that i don't have to feel guilty about bringing another child into the world when there are already children who need families as much as we want them.

if dh does insist upon having a bio child and we end up having one, i hope that will be all and we can adopt the rest. i just really hate the idea of doing that instead of adopting a child when our future son [or daughter] might be alive right now somewhere, wondering if he ever gets to have a real family.

i also like the idea of skipping the really early baby months [we plan to adopt a 1-2yo from russia] and getting to the part where they can really interact with us and other kids. it's not that i don't like newborns, i just don't have the desire to have one when i can have an older infant or toddler. many of my friends and family members with babies say how they can't wait until their kids can actually walk around and talk and do things.

eta: i also can't wait until we [hopefully] get to go to russia to not only see our child for the first time but also to really get a better understanding of his culture and hopefully go back so he can appreciate his heritage. basically i think everything about adoption is great, with the exception of complications of course.

crystalpopcorn · July 2009

I am looking forward to being able to be wholeheartedly excited about the baby arriving, and being able to experience a full term newborn. I know that sounds crazy. My pregnancy was the scariest time of my life. As I've mentioned before, I was diagnosed with cancer when I was five months pregnant. I also knew my son would be delivered early, so that I could be treated (i.e. have a hysterectomy). It was a very scary time. I didn't have the opportunity to be all giddy about paint colors, diaper bags and bedding sets. I tried hard, but I was more concerned about ensuring that both of us survived. After his birth (c-section / hysterectomy), I was trying to recover from major surgery, deal with all of my emotions AND take care of my tiny baby in the NICU for six weeks.

I know that adoption can be stressful, and full of ups and downs. I just really look forward to being able to experience some of the things I missed the first time around. I hope that makes sense, and does not offend anyone who has never had the opportunity to experience motherhood at all.

so1966 · July 2009

CaptainSerious:
Knowing that in making our dream to be parents come true, we are also providing a loving home to a child or children who would otherwise be raised in an orphanage.

this is my sentiment exactly!...

GLynn2009 · July 2009

My DH will get to be a father.

I have two children from a previous marriage that he takes better care of than their father. DH has wanted kids for a long time and can not have them. He has always said that he does not want a baby but a 2 year old. Well next week that is what she will be and we are just waiting on her visa to come home.

DH is very protective of my teenagers so DD is going to have a great papa.

ColoRxGirl · July 2009

1. No wrecked pelvic floor muscles. Every one of my friends who has vaginally delivered nearly wets herself when she laughs really hard or has a coughing fit. (I'm only half-joking here. . .)

2. The ta-tas are still magnificent! (Not joking at all here Stick out tongue )

3. Like PP said - the HOPE that was injected in our lives. Knowing that I WILL be a Mom someday.

Capricornbaby80 · July 2009

In my opinion the wonderful thing about adoption is that it gives people like me who struggle with infertility the opportunity to be a mother, because I might not have been a mother any other way. I just LOVE adoption!!!!!!

KatiesCats · July 2009

I have so many feelings about adoption. We are white and hope to adopt from Haiti. We are excited to be parents, more than anything. But we are also glad not to have to worry about unusual genetic defects in his family being passed along (notably Prader-Willi). I'm glad to never have to be pregnant...I've never had a desire to do that. And we know that we're up to the challenge (and rewards!) of adopting older children who do not have many opportunities in an orphanage. We are also going to be so prepared for transracial adoption and while we know there will be issues here and there, we hope to be the best parents our kids could possibly have.

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