Parenting after a Loss

Moms of around 1 year olds?

Is anyone really really sad that your baby is about to turn 1 or just turned 1?

The past few days, and today especially for some reason, I have been just down in the dumps.  I've been trying to figure out why, and I think its bc his birthday is almost here.  I can't believe my little tiny baby is going to be ONE.  These days he is looking and acting so much like a toddler and I can't stand it.  I mean, I LOVE IT, but I just can't believe his babyhood is all but over.  Damn it, I'm tearing up just thinking about it.

I've been VERY obsessed with wanting to get pregnant again lately, even though we have to wait until at least November.  I have dreams almost every night about either getting a BFP, being pregnant, giving birth again etc.  I'm sure its related to the fact that I just want my little baby back.

Am I alone in this? Its really really affecting me, I had no idea.


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M/c #1 - 10/30/07 - 5w3d, DS1 - born at 36w, M/c#2 - 12/7/09 - 5w, M/c #3 - 1/13/10 - 4w6d, 
M/c #4 - 3/16/10 - 5w1d, DS2 -  born via VBAC at 40w3d, M/c#5 - 11/5/12 - 7w2d
BFP #8 - 5/5/13- Looks like a sticky one! DS3 - born via epi-free VBAC at 39w1d

Re: Moms of around 1 year olds?

  • oh lordy no you are NOT alone!!!  E started walking on my EDD 7/7 - just 4 days before his b-day.  i cried and cried and cried.  then each day after that i would wake up thinking "this time last year.........this time last year........" and i would cry and cry and cry <<are you seeing a theme?!?!?!>>

    i made a shutterfly book with one page for each month of his life.  i looked through it again and again and YUP i cried and cried and cried!!!

     perfectly normal! 

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  • Totally normal! I went through that too. Well, without the wanting to be pregnant again part, lol! But I'll tell you that a bit after his 1st birthday passed, I got over it. It's such a fun age. I know, they say that about every age. But it's fun because they are a toddler without the tantrums (for the most part). More active and communicative, less fragile, more predictable, that kind of thing.

    I will admit though, when I see an infant, I get very nostalgic and want to cry, still!

  • Yes...I have very mixed feelings about it.  My husband thinks I am romanticizing her babyhood too much.  I don't know...I'm just so nostalgic.   
  • Don't get me wrong...he is a BLAST right now...so so snuggly and loving and playing with everything and imitating everything we do....its very very rewarding.

    I think part of it is also the video that I've been making of his first year.  I'm almost done with it, doing the final edits...so rewatching all these moments from newborn on brings it all back.

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    M/c #1 - 10/30/07 - 5w3d, DS1 - born at 36w, M/c#2 - 12/7/09 - 5w, M/c #3 - 1/13/10 - 4w6d, 
    M/c #4 - 3/16/10 - 5w1d, DS2 -  born via VBAC at 40w3d, M/c#5 - 11/5/12 - 7w2d
    BFP #8 - 5/5/13- Looks like a sticky one! DS3 - born via epi-free VBAC at 39w1d

  • I feel the same way.  I'm not sure we'll be TTC again, so it makes it worse.
  • Yes - I definitely went throught this! And even thought I'm pg again, I'm now and crying every other day thinking about him not being my only baby!!! I'm hoping it gets better soon!
  • It's so weird. Some days I'm sad and other days I'm so happy that he will be out of this extra-fragile stage. I think because DH is super excited that they'll be able to "play" more now, so that gets me excited. But then there are days like when he actually walked more than 5 steps and I cried. I also get said because I don't know when we'll start trying for #2 and I wish it was now. Yeah...with AF around the corner and Andy's birthday on Monday I have a feeling I'm gonna be a mess.
    DS Born July 2008
    #2 & #3 Due 8/25/12
    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
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  • I am! I'm getting more excited though with his birthday here next week and DH talking about TTC. Him growing up was harder on me when DH wasn't interested in TTC. Knowing that another LO could be around the corner makes it a little more exciting though.
  • I feel the SAME EXACT WAY. Aidan's birthday and party is Saturday, and while I'm thrilled he's happy and healthy and thriving, I'm tearing up right now just thinking about his babyhood being almost over :(
    Aidan Jake 7/25/08 Cooper Cole 7/27/10 Tessa Morgan 8/9/12
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