auntie, tell me about eye contact.
Im a total lurker here only b/c I get so emotional when it comes to my DD. long story short. EI evaled her at 23 mo. slight communication delay (20 mo.) and everything else at or above. we didnt qualify. EI then mentions SDP just to look into it but thats it,we got an eval from private OT and she agreed to sensory issues. she gave us activities to do and Ive seen great improvment and its only been a week.
6 weeks ago she was tested for hearing and got moderate to severe hearing loss (ENT suspected fluid, although not checked b/c DD wouldnt sit for it) so we waited out the 6 weeks for our recheck. in the meantime we figured thats why DD doesnt look at us or ignores us most of the time. there are times where she will very briefly look at us, but those are few and far btw. after the recheck for hearing, it comes back normal, no fluid no hearing loss.
but she still doesnt give eye contact. this makes my sad and worried the most. other quirky things she does is mouth things (not all the time though) toe walk, for as long as I can remember. and Im assuming she stims when shes twirling her hair, fiddling her fingers or picking at crayons, play-doh, sand, uncooked rice, etc. pedi neuro said to just keep and eye on these things but dismissed it as "shes fine"
with all these red flags, I dont know what to make of it. but the most bothersome is the eye contact. and I did read a post from yours the other day to not worry about it. can you share with me your thoughts...Im so emotionally drained, what more can I do? thank you for "listening"
Re: auntie, tell me about eye contact.
Just butting in to tell you you're a great mom and it's very hard not to be an emotional wreck when we have challanges with our babies. Fwiw eye contact was a big concern of ours but one of many. After one official year of intervention the results are drastic. He makes eye contact much of the time but yes we still have a lot of work to do. My ds doesn't have a great grasp on language yet but it's coming. A friend of mine, after her son got language down and got older, was able to implement ques to remind her ds that he needed to make eye contact at specific times etc. Subtle ques that she was taught. you are treating every symptom. Best of luck she's a princess!
sorry to butt in on post
butting in too... Auntie will give you an excellent response... but in the meantime ---
I think eye contact gets a lot of attention as a red flag.... No matter what piece this plays for your sweet girl.... you are worried. Best advice is follow your gut. If your gut is telling you that the evals/professionals haven't quite satisfied your worries... push further. A full EI evaluation for concerns of ASD would include a group (Psychologist, Speech, OT, ??) and they would combine their expertise.
I will tell you that even though I really love our SLP now -- in the beginning she just didn't know autism if it slapped her in the face. And we went through 3 OT's before we found the right one. And the pediatrician wasn't concerned at all. YOU are the expert. The individual therapists have their niche. They have been trained over a specific period of time and likely don't have training in each specific disorder they treat. So, if they aren't 'up' on ASD's.... they aren't going to put that picture together if necessary.
You are doing such a good job. Treating the issues that are presenting is REALLY what EI is about anyway... so she is getting help in those areas currently - with or without an accurate diagnosis.
One note I will say on Eye Contact until you get the answer you're looking for is that it's just not a necessary piece for my son to communicate with me. When I am 'making' him look at me - like if I'm disciplining - it might make ME feel like he's listening better - but in all likelyhood he is having to work harder to listen to me because he is working harder to look at me. Don't make it a huge issue to 'work on' until you hear otherwise.
Oh - I said too much. Sorry. I hope you can get some answers soon. I know the stabbing feeling and the sleepless nights and the tears upon tears of wonder and wait. I pray that your child just needs that extra push with Speech and OT and this is not a lifelong 'disorder'. However, if it is, it is better to get started NOW. There are blessings beyond measure once you get that team in place and get those concerns sorted out.
Don't shy away from asking questions here. Giving us followups, etc... This group is SUCH a great support!
I know Auntie will answer your question more directly ---- and I pray you find the answers you seek very soon.
BOTH your children are darling!!
"But here's the thing, given you child's age watchful waiting may be the only option available to you. As delays ASDs are easier to pick up as a child is older and more sophisticated behavior is expected of them."
I have to say, I'm amazed at how well-qualified doctors can assess even the youngest of children... like you've said, "different" behaviors are usually easy to recognize in very young children, and experienced doctors (in my limited experience) seem to be able to sift through those behaviors to determine if a more thorough evaluation is appropriate...
I know that when I began calling around looking for people to evaluate Sylvie, a handful of doctors informed me that they didn't provide evaluations for children under 3. Had I ended my research there, I would've never found many more doctors who were able to evaluate my not-yet-two year old... just wanted to illustrate the point that early evaluations are possible; it's just a matter of finding the right doctors- and I'll concede, my location (Boston) probably affords me a lot more options for evaluations/treatments/therapies than other regions.
thank you so much ladies for the responses, support and kind words. and thank you auntie, I didnt mean to call you out like that but you, like many others here, share great insight and information and I thank you all.
I promise to share more and keep you all updated. for now Im gonna let my heart rest, its so heavy today.
I can't speak to the eye contact, but you mention your DD toe-walks. Have you looked into why? Toe-walking can be a sign of a few things, you might want to discuss this with your pedi.
I completely understand the greiving. It is so hard to accept that your child isn't the "perfect" child but I have to keep reminding myself that nearly every child has *something* to overcome, kwim?