Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: How much do you pay for an infant spot at a center?
Varies widely by region...
When we were looking for DD, in northern California, we were looking at about $350-$450/week. We ended up going with a nanny share for $340/week (which included a little extra for the nanny to clean our house).
Here in Texas, for this baby, the two centers I have my eye on are around $250/week.
It does go down as they get older... we're paying about $150/week for DD's preschool right now. A nice change from $340/week just a little over a year ago!
Mommy to DD1 (June 2007), DS (January 2010), DD2 (July 2012), and The Next One (EDD 3/31/2015)
$230/week until out of diapers, then it drops.
You will get a wide range of answers to your question, it really depends on the area.
Yeah I asked my local board too. At an inhome I pay $150 a week.
And it doesn't always, but it can look like this including her ownkids: my baby, a 1 year old, three 3 year olds, a 4 year old, a 7 year old, a 10 year old, two preteens and a 17 year old. Granted most days during the year most of them would be in school but still. Yes, its legal. She could even take 2 more over age 2 if she wanted. A providers own kids "don't count" after age 6. I give whoever made that rule the Side Eye.
But the center close by charges $954 a month, or you can do a drop in of $55 a day. Their ratio is 1:3. It was phenomenal too. I only need 4 days a week most of the time, but there would be times where we need 5. We were paying for the extra day at in-home since it was only an extra $30 a week. But that's a TON of extra money for the center.
Other than these 2, I have ruled out all the other (very limited) options in my area.
Throwing leaves
Here in Boston we were looking at paying $1700 a month. That is not a misprint. Instead we are paying the same but sharing a nanny with our neighbors.
Also, it's nearly impossible from what I hear to find part-time center care for an infant - since the teacher to child ratio is so low they want all the $$$ they can get. A family setting would probably be more flexible; you can also find part-time nannies but ours definitely wants full time.
Ds starts his new daycare on monday (we moved)--$187 a week.
Old daycare was $263 a week.
So going from $150 to $220/week... hmmm, that is quite a bit of an increase. For me, it would just depend on how good I felt about the in-home situation. When we were looking here in Texas, I saw in-home places that charged less than $100/week. (See my post above... we ended up paying $200/week for a SAHM who watched only DD, and centers were about $250/week.) Most of the cheaper places took on a ton of kids, while the SAHM said that she would never take on more than three kids, plus her own two school-age boys (8 and 11) -- and indeed, for most the year that we used her, it was only DD + her kids. It was well worth the extra money for me to put DD someplace with a lower ratio.
I say get the best daycare that you can afford... that is NOT to say that more expensive = better (we just put DD in preschool, and it just so happened that the place we liked the best was also the cheapest), but in your case, it sounds like the more expensive place is the better place. If it's a choice between paying your mortgage and paying for the center, well then pay for your mortgage. But if you can afford the extra $70/week, do it. You can't put a price on your child's well-being and your own peace of mind.
Mommy to DD1 (June 2007), DS (January 2010), DD2 (July 2012), and The Next One (EDD 3/31/2015)